Altar of Twilight Never had so[M]eone to call my own

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No need to match length. Woo I got a little carried away.

Dark fur, large paws. Tearing up the ground. Red Eyes gleaming, staring into the night. There were thousands of stars above him, each one winking and glinting to caress his fur. Laying heavy on his scars, lighting them up for the world to see. Today he felt them, heard the voices, felt as each one was carved into his body and further into his soul.

The beast was not an emotional one, but on nights like this one, when all was silent, his mind took a journey into the realm of where he used to be and what he used to be and it filled him with something akin to regret and sadness, but he didn't have the words for this, at least he hadn't at the time.

Perhaps, there was hope for him once upon a time. Perhaps just perhaps, he could have been better, but here he was. Scarred. Heavy. Hard. Broken. Some would say.

His mind drifted to @Atka Tsimshian and a heavy feeling built upon his chest. He didn't quite understand what she was doing to him and he both adored and resented her for it. Then his mind went to the other scent @Heph that clung to her, that made his insides tighten and his brain fill with such rage, and then guilt. Because she did not belong to him. And he needed to remember that.

Suddenly he lifted his head back and he howled everything, every single feeling to the sky, it echoed around him and rang back. He didn't even know what it said to anyone, he didn't care.

The altar of twilight. A fitting place for his voice to ring out, as the moon caressed his body. He growled low, thunderous, angry. And growled again. There was a restlessness to his spirit, a itch beneath the surface that he could not and wasn't sure he wanted to rid himself of.

He wanted to tear and maim and rip, or honestly fuck something until he couldn't anymore. Until he fell to the ground, exhausted and spent. Anything, and something to get rid of these feelings that he was both curious for and hated himself for. Feelings got you killed, got you beaten and flayed. Emotions gave you the pit and the creatures that made their home down there.

There bugs that crawled and bit and burrowed in skin, and ears and eyes. The darkness that pressed on all sides, darkness of each and every body and soul down there. The way they took what they wanted from whomever they wanted and it didn't matter their age. They left the puppies broken and bleeding. He had been one. Used so viciously his body still bore the marks, but he had survived hadn't he. He had made it out. But what if that wasn't enough. What if.

Tonight was not a good night for what ifs. And he made his way to the wall that glowed and he stood beneath it. The moon light dipping down to caress and dip along every valley, every curve that made up his body. It touched on scars and blemishes, lit up his eyes with a gentler glow than usual. And he threw his head back to stare at the stars, the one solace he had always had. Anytime, he needed to escape and his father couldn't help him. He just looked up.