Stavanger Bay do any men grow up or do they only come of age?

the ghost had not ventured down to see embry in quite some time. they had shared a good sparring session before – it seemed – the man had disappeared without a trace. illidan had searched a good portion of the coast near to the sound, but nothing had come of it. he'd wondered if it was appropriate for him to visit the sandy man's pack in person, or if he would be scolded for assuming too much. surely, it was pup season; illidan had not known for sure, but he could safely assume that the ocean-loving fellow had a woman and children running through the sands of his home.

it was that pleasant thought that propelled him forward until he had reached the edges of the bay. something in the air had caught him off guard. he trailed the edge of the pack with a furrowed brow and a thin-lipped expression that creased his forehead. firefly's scent was there, and it was stronger than the boy had ever smelled it before. betrayal filled his heart faster than anything else. no amount of rationality could fix what he believed was true.

angry, illidan drew back his head and called – no, demanded – that @Firefly meet him at the edges of the claim.

The call surprised him, but as he made his slow and swaggering advance to where Illidan waited, no such expression was exposed to placate the boy. He was happy to see him. Truthfully, his face did eventually split in to the winning smile of a car dealership's top earner; had he the ability to swing his arms wide and welcome Illidan close, he would have. The boy was a bit tense and Firefly didn't know what to say to get him to chill out; so he was quiet, passive, until he was close enough that shouting would be useless.

Illidan! Welcome to ---- oh shit, he had no idea what this place was even called, and had to think fast, my pack! Never expected to see you here. Come on, I can show you around -- and he side stepped, motioning with his snout that he should follow. They could walk a while and talk like old times.

firefly was quick to approach, and he did so with... jovial steps. illidan watched him with squinted eyes and an unreadable expression on his young face. his friend was strolling up to him with a wide smile and an air about him that suggested there was nothing to be concerned about. to the young ghost, this all seemed like a wildly fabricated dream that had been concocted with only his mind. this was embry's pack... this was not where firefly belonged. more than this, the boy did not feel as though any of this could have been real when firefly had not even told him that he was leaving rusalka.

“hold... on a second,” illidan remarked in a choked voice. his gaze searched the features of his friend for a moment and begged him to slow down and hold still for a moment. he needed to ground himself before he fell off the deep end. “this isn't... this is stormrift? embry lives here – or he did – and,” then he paused and straightened himself up. what the fuck had firefly meant that this was his pack? nothing about that statement made sense.

“what are you doing here, firefly?”

His friend seemed to seize up. He questioned things that he had no reason to question, speaking names that Firefly didn't recognize. His grin began to falter - then slipped away entirely - as Illidan reached his real question. The man scoffed and tried to keep the nonchalance going as he explained, I went hunting for adventure but my partner in crime wussed out, thinking of Yami brought an edge to his words. Came across this place and thought I would have a little fun. You shoulda seen the other guy - didn't take much to win this place.

It was his now though. A place to rule, without any useless women to question him or bog him down with responsibilities. No Erzulie to fawn over, no Rosalyn to fight with. The rest of the pack would fall in line - it was all a game, and he would come out the winner. Bro, come on - I figured you would be happy for me. Think of our two packs as a united front.

all of it was confusing. there was a partner in crime? where did they come from and where had they gone in this great clusterfuck that firefly was describing? illidan wasn’t certain how this had come to be, but he wanted answers before he decided to follow the sun-touched male. everything inside of him screamed of betrayal, but he did what he could to think better of his friend. he knew firefly. he knew that the man before him was good… didn’t he? was there something that he had missed when recruiting the dark man to their claim?
 
“firefly, wait,” illidan pleaded with the man, his voice cracking and breaking with the emotion that had bubbled up from within him. “what’s going on? what about your children? you just left them… you just left your family,” he continued on, unable to prevent himself from sputtering further. before he could prevent himself from speaking again, the dark-hooded wildling looked to his friend with a deep sadness in his hawkish gaze.
 
“you left me…”

He was hoping to show Illidan around - maybe manage to convince him to stay for the long-term, and together they could rule over this stretch of beach much like they had over Rusalka; but before he could get that far the boy was stopping him. His voice held a pleading edge to it that made Firefly pause. He had his back to Illidan for a few moments but he didn't move, listening as Illidan brought up the children, the family he'd given up to be here.

You left me... the boy lamented quietly. Firefly felt his stomach clench, his chest seize with some tension, and he looked at the soot-capped boy with a flickering sadness of his own. It was the barest of shifts and quickly contained, hidden behind a stronger veneer as Firefly let out a humorless laugh to cover how he really felt.

Family? What family. He had meant Rosalyn and Erzulie; one woman who barely trusted him in the beginning and the other which, after his departure, likely would never forgive him for the abandonment.

what family?

illidan flinched at the sound of that. his heart sank into his stomach and he turned his gaze away from his friend in hopes that he could steady himself before losing his cool. he did not want to fight firefly. he did not want to add to the feelings of resentment that seemed to have festered beneath the man's dark coat. grief weighed heavily on illidan's heart and soul. he did not understand how things had turned so sour. he did not understand how the man had turned his back on everything that had been offered to him.

“rusalka,” illidan reaffirmed in a quiet voice. he still could not look at the scarred man. firefly seemed like a stranger to the ghost; this was someone that he did not recognize. “when we met on the beach for the first time, i'd told you that you would have a family in the pack and that we would support you no matter what... or did you forget that?” his lip curled as he spoke; the hair along his neck and shoulders rose into jagged spikes.

“your children will never know what it means to have a father.” in that moment – admitting those words – illidan felt the weight of them against his soul. would they turn out like him? would they carry that weight around inside of them forever? something seized inside of him, and he battled the tears that were working their way to his eyes. “this place? it has offered you something better?” illidan asked, gesturing to the bay.

The topic of family brought flashes of women to his mind, not men, not Illidan. But it wasn't because Firefly did not feel as if they weren't worthy of it; he thought of Rosalyn and Erzulie because of his guilt. He thought of Niamh too, but lacked the courage to investigate her claim to him. It went without saying (at least for Firefly) that Rusalka was home and that Illidan was more than just family, but what would it matter? The women ruled there, and they loathed him. He'd made the mistake of being emotional and letting his fear drive him off the beach when they needed him the most — there was no coming back from that.

When we met on the beach for the first time, i'd told you that you would have a family in the pack and that we would support you no matter what... Illidan spoke, and gradually Firefly came to watch him, until he saw the way his friend bristled and reacted; he did not want to mirror the agitation or cause a fight with someone he felt so close to - that would be the final bridge burned - but he couldn't just stand there in silence.

Your children will never know what it means to have a father.

That isn't my fault. He shot back. If you want someone to blame for that, blame those fucking women! His tail lashed behind him and settled high; he couldn't contain his rage as he spoke of the two new mothers. Rosalyn never wanted me to be their father, you know that Illidan. She doesn't even want to be a mother, she just used me to make Erzulie happy. It doesn't matter if I'm in Rusalka or not. They never wanted me to play that role. And he never wanted to be the father to their bastards, he'd always been in it for the sex.

Or that's what he told himself.

Firefly did not miss the glimmer that overtook his friend's gaze; he scoffed as he took notice of it, and was about to turn away, leave the sobbing child behind for good. But Illidan wasn't done; his voice halted Firefly's escape (as it always would). This place? it has offered you something better? 

He glared at the boy for that question — feeling the strength of his guilt, and finally taking it upon himself to bottle that up with the rest of his emotions, shoving it down deep. This is mine, came his frigid voice, claiming dominion over the bay which he stole — and the look on Firefly's face was chilled to match. He need not tell the boy to go home - that one look said it all.

something had changed in his friend and illidan did not know when it had happened, or why. all he could do was stare at firefly with a doleful expression on his inky face. the hurt was difficult to mask, so he did little to hide it. it didn’t seem to matter how he felt about any of it, though. firefly had made up his mind; he wasn’t a part of rusalka anymore. having to confirm that thought in his head, the ghost gritted his teeth and swallowed heavily, hoping to clear the lump from the back of his throat.
 
no matter how many times he had thought of the future, and no matter how uncertain he was of what it would hold for him… illidan always had imagined that firefly would be there. it was foolish, he knew, to think that he could keep someone in one place with only his thoughts. as he stood on the border of a pack, he knew nothing about, talking to the one person he never thought would leave, the young ghost felt the familiar prick of disappointment. that was what being a fool would get him.
 
unable to continue this conversation any longer, illidan lowered his head toward the sands and breathed a soft sigh. the look in his friend’s eye was enough to tell him that he was not welcome there – the invitation to enter the pack had been retracted. the wildling could hardly handle the pain that was pouring through his frame in every second that he stood there and listened to firefly speak the way that he had. the young man turned his back and pointed himself toward rusalka once more.
 
“i hope you are happy, firefly…” he remarked sadly before making his way down the stretch of beach and out of sight.