Emberwood Vilipending Loneliness

The moon's half light lit the tops of the canopy with a dull glimmer. The hour was late. Deer and many of their kin were sound asleep among well chosen encampments of bramble and tall grasses. Tracking such animals at night in thick forest was damn near impossible, as too many others were active and disturbed the pathways the animals had taken in the dusk. Taikon sneered at a set of hoof prints that had recently been smeared with raccoon paws. He could hear a family of either coons or some other small beast chittering among themselves, apparently entertained by how obvious a white wolf appeared in the darkness.
The wolf had meant to find cover much earlier than this. He had trekked far over the past two days, as usual for his loner lifestyle. The rain had blasted him while following a creek, but the closest forested area was many miles away. Though he was thankful to have been graced with balmy weather and only rare winds, his bulky coat was only just beginning to dry under the cover of trees.
Letting out a long, tired sigh, he sat in the moist dirt, abandoning the search for his quarry as he covered the tracks with a wet bum.
Taikon had always known that moving from place to place as he did was hardly good for his health. The best way to find food reliably was to truly know your environment. To feel the earth beneath your paws and expect the vibration of only particular animals in an area was powerful. More importantly, to know regional weather patterns and where the best hunting grounds were was a serious win. Taikon hadn't stayed in the same place for many years. Though he enjoyed the constant stimulation of the novel, he often had moments like this; they were moments that made him remember how difficult this choice of life was.
Come on now, don't be stupid, he thought, vilipending his longstanding loneliness. This is how it has to be. A pack is meant for beasts without minds. It is a prison where only the powerful prevail.
The predator stretched his body before raising himself up again, pushing forth at a reasonable trot, inhaling the cool air at each stride to test for potential prey. Deer had always been the wrong choice for this hunt; that was obvious.

---

The hours passed, and at last, Taikon launched from a carefully selected patch of weeds. A loud set of squeals was heard for nearly twenty, agonizing seconds as the wolf mashed his teeth into the neck of a very large rodent. The gnawing that had been heard moments before subsided, and all that remained was the burbling water of the creekside, many metres away.
The beaver was a solid prize for his hard and patient work. He did not hesitate in setting into his kill, enjoying the lovely snaps and cracks of sinew and bone. Occasionally, he would let out small growls, as though being forced to share with packmates. Each time he did this, he noticed it, and hated himself for it.
How odd it would be indeed to have another join him at this hour.

Ever had one of those moments where you know something is a bad idea, but then you end up doing it anyway for some bizarre reason? Yeah. That. Spook had heard something and so he headed that way, morbidly curious, uncertain what he'd find in the unfamiliar forest. This time he'd gone looking to make sure some of the wolves that had been a bit more scarce lately were just out scouting -- he worried now, and it had brought him to unfamiliar lands. He was finding his way home, albeit slowly, carefully. He knew he'd be missed, so he'd be home soon.

But what he heard had distracted him off his path. In darkness, noises outside quiet shuffles and night birds drew his attention quickly. What was going on? What monsters lurked? Until he had a clear view, his mind went wild with all kinds of creeping, terrifying things that might be out there. It had been a while since monsters haunted him, but here was a nice new nightmare.

Or was, until the sounds became clearly a wolf. Strangers were a different fear. Spook made no move to get closer than he was, but his brain had momentarily emptied of all thought -- he stood there, staring, for a moment or two before just saying, Um. Nobody would mistake him for anything other than a foolish yearling who was just plain confused about... Well, life in general, but right now let's just narrow it down to what to say when stumbling across some random stranger in the middle of the night.

Growling while he tore the leathery tail from the animal and threw it aside for later, Taikon continued his feast. Having rid the carcass of the choice innards, he focused now on stripping the rest of the exterior. Beavers had excruciatingly thick fur, and the wolf did not find that any pieces of the skin went down easily. So with each pull at the animal, there was left in a strewn array chunks of skin and fur. The spot in the woods looked like a horror film; or perhaps a wolf party, complete with furry confetti.
Such a party did not expect a guest, but there he was all the same. Glowing, strange eyes peered at Taikon in the darkness. At first glance in the shadows, Taikon was sure it was another lone wolf, come to try to scavenge from the male. He fiercely snarled and snapped his jaws hard into the beaver, shoving it into the enclave of his front legs.
But when the black and white beastie came more clearly into view, Taikon relaxed somewhat. It was a large, but young, male. He looked reasonably well fed and the expression on his youthful features hardly suggested he was here to be a nuisance. Oh, Taikon murmured.
By this time, the beaver had very little attached to it. What was sitting between his legs was a bloodied set of bones and some cartilage. The tail was..somewhere. Taikon looked about for it. Did..did you come for this? he asked. It was of course, always possible that the young male was out looking for beasts to scavenge from. I was hoping for a deer but, well, yeah. There isn't much left here, he babbled.
Taikon was not particularly friendly by nature, but he was also not one to look for a fight for no reason. Young males, being inexperienced and full of energy, resonated with him.

To Spook, the whole thin gseemed weird. He hadn't expected to actually find someone, he hadn't expected to have them be friendly -- apparently? It was weird. Give the youth a sort of deer in headlights expression through the whole thing. The snarls and tearing on approach had given a very different color to the whole scene so now he wasn't very sure what to think. But hey, Spook was generally a nonthreatening guy, right? At least his long legs were good for something -- he could always run if things changed, and he certainly wasn't afraid to do so.

No, um. Pause. Stare. Blink. A sort of twitch as he tried to make himself sure that he was even awake in the first place. What, you'd catch a deer all by yourself? Spook had thus far stuck to smaller, less dangerous things when on his own. It was, obviously, safer. But that sounded childlike to him, so he quickly added, That just seems like um, a lot. A lot of food, obviously. And work. And maybe too much danger to make it worth it, at least from the youngster's perspective.

The young two-toned wolf seemed flabbergasted. Taikon blinked back at him, unsure what to make of the reaction. This late at night, he certainly hadn't expected anyone to find him in the woods, but the wolf was here. There was no reason to chase him off; the beast was hardly a threat to him, or so he felt.
Could he catch a deer by himself? Taikon scrunched his face up, thinking, as if doing math in his head. Well, no, not an adult, unless there was something really wrong with it I guess, he admitted. It would be a lot, he nodded. But the youngsters from spring aren't too big yet, so I was looking for mothers and their... young. He let out a sigh, annoyed that his thought process had been challenged.
He'd probably deserved that.
What were you looking for, anyway? Now it was Taikon's turn to do the challenging. He continued gnawing at a hunk of vertebrae, chewing on the bits attached to it.

It wasn't like this guy had specified what kind of deer. Spook had just jumped to the conclusion that it'd be a big one. Adults could maybe do that, right? Arbiter probably could. Spook wasn't gonna try. He'd rather have the pack. At the response, his ears tipped back a little. It had been a fair question. My brother. And considering Spook was alone, it was probably pretty obvious he hadn't found a sign of Pike. I was going to go home. Unsuccessful at his goal, but at least it meant he could return home.

He had to wonder, would his mother want him to try to recruit random people like this guy? Obviously he could hunt, so it wasn't like Spook would be trying to bring back some totally useless person. He tried to explore the idea a little from a not-so obvious angle while he thought through what Arbiter would think, You aren't with a pack? It was sort of confirming, sort of asking why not. Spook had always been with his family, and wasn't exactly sure why anyone would want to leave, but maybe that just made him weird.

Ah, acknowledged Taikon, nodding as if everything now seemed clear as to why the young man had been walking alone at night. The white wolf had expected hunting to have been the answer, but it didn't really matter. He was here now, talking to a stranger.
Taikon had one brother. After what had happened with the Faruka, he did not like to think of or speak of him. Markus had been his only ally in that insanity. Unfortunately, he had also been powerless to do anything about it. There was no going back. Because of his toxic views related to packlife, there was also no real going forward for Taikon.
Thus, when the young wolf asked about a pack, the white male furrowed his brow slightly, looking past the other as though seeing something in the woods beyond. There was nothing. No, I'm not. He blinked slowly. Having dropped the bone he'd been chewing on, the subject stirred a nasty feeling in his gut, and he stood up to begin pacing to burn off the anxiety creeping. He puttered over to a tree and scratched at the ground with a paw, focusing on it as if he had some serious intention with the action.
Packs are just illusions of safety. They're nothing but a collection of fascist regimes and power structures that keep you from being you. It just wasn't for me, that's all, he rambled, saying all of it much quicker than he meant. He felt a heat rising to his chest and his ears. His breathing quickened as he looked at the young wolf, who no doubt had not expected such an overly argumentative answer.

Spook, of course, had not a clue what was going on inside the guy's head, but he felt like the atmosphere changed. He'd asked an innocent question but the responses? Not what he was expecting. Not that Spook often knew what he was thinking but he was in a dark, unfamiliar forest at night and there was this dude here who had been kinda creepy.

That feeling was coming back. He was suddenly really wishing he wasn't so far from home. And that last response? Totally foreign to him. Like this dude was basically an alien. Spook took a step back, even if it might not have been necessary. Um. Well. Mine's my family. So I should like.. Go home before uh.. Mom misses me. Probably. Another step back. If he could just be allowed to casually walk on out, that seemed like the best response. Spook was not equipped to deal with this sort of thing. 

After seeing what he'd done to the beaver, he was just not too keen to have it done to himself. There were still times when Spook still imagined himself a small pup, and this was one of those times.

Taikon did not like feeling exposed. He did not like the fear the boy was displaying, and he did not have the emotional know-how to bring himself back to reality. The yearling nervously replied, speaking of family. Taikon turned back around from his dark corner by the tree, raising a brow as he questioned the validity of a mother missing a yearling. Part of him realized the youngster was trying to excuse himself to leave. Perhaps it was the lack of sleep, but something made him feel shame, embarrassed by his own outburst.
He stepped forward, mirroring the boy's steps back. I'm not going to hurt you, if that's what you're so worried about, Taikon offered. He was so undersocialized from living alone for years that he'd plum forgotten what being young and with a stranger even felt like. Look maybe I shouldn't have.. He took a deep breath and let out a long sigh. I'm sorry. He stood there, the bloodied mess still about him, looking quite sheepish.
This is what happens when you talk, you idiot, he thought, cursing himself. He could feel self-loathing threatening to creep in. I-I'm Taikon, the white wolf offered again, lowering his head, mouth still bloodied, hoping with a weird desperation to get the boy to stay.

There was a reason Spook was named what he was. He had yet to grow out of it, either. Certainly he'd been working on it, but he wasn't the bravest wolf by nature, that part would likely never change. Faced with the odd, he'd rather just leave. In this case, he'd frozen, more because he was afraid and had also been told to do so than because he trusted the guy at all. Taikon had done a good job at weirding Spook out and now he was at that crossroad where was on the verge of fleeing but hadn't quite done so. Give him a reason and he'd be gone. 

He'd sort of failed to say a few things, mouth hanging open before finally saying, I'm -- I'm Spook.  Mentally fumbling a moment more, Then-- what do you want? That was the real thing. He sounded like he didn't like packs, and if he didn't like packs he probably thought Spook was somehow bad too -- or at least that's the train of thought that he was jumping to. It was likely entirely wrong.

As the moments passed, the terrified boy finding his words, Taikon took a pause to reflect on his actions. He flicked his eyes around for a brief second, noting the inherent violence associated with his hunt. It was dark, late, and he was nothing more than a ranting stranger to this young yokel. Taikon listened as the bi-coloured youth spoke his name, Spook, so befitting. Hey, Spook, he said more calmly, offering a small smile. His question gave the white male pause; Taikon blinked a couple times, unsure and undecided.
I mean I wanted to find food and I did, I guess, he chuckled. The joke wasn't funny, and he made a face at his awkwardness. Sorry, he paused for a long moment, until a raven called out in the distance. There seem to be a lot of packs in these parts, and I don't know my way around. I'm.. worried of unfriendly folk, if that makes sense. Do you know of people like that? Of.. people to avoid?
He'd asked a question to respond to a question because in truth, he didn't know the answer. The prince had long wandered in search of what he wanted — it was hardly a straight-forward riddle.

Spook still wasn't sure what to do or think about Taikon. The youth wasn't the sort who would so easily be won over once someone freaked him out. He wanted distance and safety and things to not be odd. Whether it was common sense to be careful or he just didn't have enough experience to realize sometimes people mess up was up in the air. Still, he'd answer, kind of obediently. Um. There's a pack called Ursus that my mom says we should stay away from. Their leader killed his mom and is all weird and sneaky and stuff. He was not very good at describing it. So, it was better to quote something he had a better grasp of, She thinks it's best to just be like, 'Yep, well, I gotta go' and then leave like everything's normal. In other words, avoid pissing off unpredictable people.

He paused then, awkwardly, I think that's it for like.. mean people though. I think other people are supposed to be pretty nice... Near here at least. It wasn't like Spook was some crazy adventurer who knew about the whole world beyond the horizon. Pretty much the opposite of that. Another pause, Are you just gonna like.. keep moving around then or something? He'd seemed awfully weird about packs, so he was just guessing.

Taikon felt his blood grow cold as a familiar name left the lips of the black and white boy. He shifted uncomfortably to put weight on his other side, looking gravely at Spook. Apparently, the leader of the pack had killed his mother and probably other unspeakable actions. This hit home for the white male.
The actions of his own mother had rocked him to his core. At first, Taikon had wanted to kill them. All of them. The Farukans were still, in his mind, an source of evil powered by a dictatorship that consisted of his mother and her new mate. When he had been exiled, he wanted to hurt them all for Cella's death. Now, he could not see himself harming them. While he saw the power structure that had been created as evil, he no longer felt that it was any individual at fault.
From what the boy said, it sounded like for the Ursus at Bearclaw, it was.
His thought process kept him from listening for much of what Spook told him past the Ursus. The boy asked a question, and the white wolf had to replay what had been said for a moment. He just remembered something about "mostly nice" people. Keep moving. Yes. Uh, he began, equally awkward, attempting to find his words. Yeah, that's how I've lived for a years now. It's not all bad, I move from place to place, see lots of land. Meet people. He was pleased that the boy hadn't jumped ship on him. He seemed unsure. Young. Nice.
And you? You live with your mom and your brother? Taikon wondered how he might have reacted to himself at Spook's age. He was much bolder as a child, but did not blame the boy for his caution.

What he said seemed to cause some sort of reaction in the guy. Maybe distraction? He wasn't very good at the whole figuring out people thing, let alone weird strangers who had already kinda freaked out a little. How much was someone just being weird and how much was something he could actually figure out and understand at a later date? He'd get better at it eventually... Probably.

But then he seemed to try to get back on track. Roughly. But then again, didn't variants on 'roughly' describe much of the conversation so far? But that wasn't to say he had any understanding why someone would want to stay on their own -- hadn't understood it with that one chick, didn't understand it with  Taikon either. Either way, he nodded a bit, And my sister, who from the tone of it, definitely wasn't his favorite person around. And some friends I grew up with.. And a few other people in the pack too. He didn't know the other adults that well, just the wolves his own age -- and his mother, obviously. He wasn't sure if there was anything else to say on that, he was still kind of lost and wary about this whole interaction.

Spook nodded, but Taikon was unconvinced that he had understood fully what he had said. He didn't blame the boy. Why would anyone trust his word? He had failed to relay that he had spoken with a member of the dreaded Ursus quite recently. 
A sister. Of course: that explained the boy's girlish demeanor in Taikon's eyes. Lovely, he said. It came out sarcastically, but he hadn't meant it that way, and sought immediately to rectify it. Honestly, that sounds good. He clarified. I should tell you; I ran into a person from Ursus a couple days ago. He said something about being an Ironclad or some such. Served the Bruin-witch. Taikon parroted what he remembered from the conversation. So, is who is "top dog" in your pack, then? He waited.

Curious head tilt. Were sisters really that big of a unanimous lame thing that he had to agree? It made him feel at least a little better that maybe the strife between them wasn't unusual. Or at least, that was how Spook was gonna take it because that was the thing that made sense, especially since he'd sort of backtracked a little. 

And.. He'd met someone from Ursus? His eyes widened a moment, but his expression shifted then into one more focused so he'd be able to remember everything that was said and parrot it back to anyone of importance back home. Were they all weird too? Or um. Dangerous or something? Spook wouldn't exactly stick around if someone was super duper dangerous -- as was obvious from the fact he'd almost skedaddled here -- but if they were all more sneaky than outright threatening he'd really have to be careful if he traveled more.

And then looped back to something he definitely had a handle on, My mom. Um. Arbiter. A guy named Kaertok helps too, not that they'd done much together, and Spook still had questions about him, but it's my mom's pack. End of story, there. If Taikon had any doubts about that fact, Spook wasn't sure how he'd properly explain how Arbiter was without it sounding awful -- she was a different kind of monster that protected them.

Honestly, he was kind of a dick. The summary was blunt. I didn't get his name, Taikon added, thinking back to the weird conversation. The dark male had basically warned him not to come near Ursus in fewer words, then wandered off. Taikon had met a number of wolves, but he was hoping that he wouldn't need to run into that one ever again.
The lone wolf listened as the boy gave further information on his birth pack. Ah, so that makes you a prince, then. The white wolf sat down, finally feeling comfortable enough after his earlier outburst to do so. He looked at the young creature, and his lip twitched for a moment. He hardly looks or acts like a prince, he thought, though he didn't have much to compare to other than himself. At this age, Taikon had been very bold and very stupid. 
And your father? Because he had focused all of his energy on not saying something rude, Taikon failed to recognize that Spook's parental situation might be a sensitive subject. That had been true for him for a long time. By the time he did think of it, the question already hung in the air.

Spook nodded. It was good to know, and though it didn't give them much new info just about that one guy, at least it probably meant a lot of them were probably awful. Well, at least they didn't try to kill you too or something. That was the impression he'd been given about them, and he'd rather continue thinking that because it sounded like the most safe option. Spook really wanted to stay all in one piece.

He crinkled his nose, sort of confused, A prince? But it was more to himself. Arbiter hadn't called him that before had she? No. He didn't even really know what that would entail, as Arbiter was one who scoffed at the idea of royalty. Wait, ew, did that make Brou a princess? Nobody tell her that. That was illegal, she'd start prancing around and they'd never hear the end of it!

Whatever, Taikon was talking again -- and then he moved on to something else that tore at the barely healed wound. His mouth opened and closed for a moment before he finally said, quietly, He's dead. Which pretty well ended things there. How was Spook supposed to just move beyond that?

These Ursus beasts seemed like not a force to be messed with. Taikon thought back to the unfriendly grey wolf, wondering how it might have been different had the other male decided he wanted a fight. He supposed he was rather lucky. Luck had been kind to him in general since his arrival in the Wilds.
A prince, the son of a king and queen, Taikon clarified. Every pack seemed to use different terminology to describe their leaders. As Taikon's family had invested heavily in the idea of a monarchy and royal bloodlines, he was more used to the idea that aristocracy and those of pure royal blood were "better" than others. Clearly, this youngster didn't have the same bias.
The news that Spook's father was dead hit his chest. The words briefly knocked the breath out of him, and he realized he should not have asked. Oh, he answered flatly, looking away.
Taikon's father had also died when he was young. He didn't like thinking about it. He thought about saying something, but when his words failed him, he could only sit there awkwardly. Time to go, said the lizard brain. The white wolf was good at few things. He was terrible at many other things, and one was talking about death. Taikon stood abruptly. I should let you get back to your search for your brother, it's uh..late, he said. I'm sorry about earlier, Spook.
He waited a brief second for a reply before turning away and setting off at a lope into the dark woods, leaving the boy alone with his...feelings.

He wasn't sure the titles fit at all. Sure, his mom lead the pack and his dad used to too, but Arbiter had likely only used the terms mockingly. But that and the topic of Terance were passed over soon enough. Perhaps it was the awkwardness, the finality? Either way it seemed like this conversation had come to an end.

The whole thing had been weird, and Spook wasn't exactly the most comfortable about it. But hey, he survived, that was good, wasn't it? Um. Yeah. I'll uh, see ya. He wasn't going to necessarily say he wanted to run into Taikon ever again, but maybe if he ever did it wouldn't be so bizarre. Whatever. He watched the guy go then headed off on his own track back to the pack.