Hoshor Plains I miss you so

@Rowan Dated 8/2

Steph wasn't really sure how she ended up on the east side of the mountains. She had just started walking and here she was. She had thought about going back to Easthollow but she wasn't sure if that was the right thing to do. It would always be her home, of course. But if she wanted to be an independent wolf in her prime, she felt she needed to make a name for herself in her own. Just like Valette had. 

So, instead of heading west, her paws had taken her east. She wasn't exactly sure where she was going or what she would find, but she supposed she would take it as it came. Her thoughts often went back to Sunny, and how this was supposed to be the adventure they took together. But if Steph wanted to look toward her future, she would need to find a way to let that dream go. Eventually. For now, she imagined him next to her, his eyes bright, his smile encouraging. For just a moment, her heart wasn't shattered.

They were making their way at a good pace to Blackfeather now.
He hoped Marisol was ok, resting for a moment with Tundra. He'd moved out to start hunting for them, and he expected Tundra would probably be doing the same; ever the hard worker.

The grasses sprung up around him, bright red and pink flowers too. There were many bugs flitting through the grasses, battering him as he passed.
He snapped up a few of the crickets, which were ok. He thought they felt like fish bones in his mouth.
His head poked up through the grasses, checking where he was.
Ahead, a dark wolf trod through the grass.

He chuffed, bounding up towards them, tail waving to show he was friendly.

She stayed in her blissful state as long as she could, but it would never last long enough. The real world would always interrupt. She did not react immediately to the chuff, instead her eyes stayed on Sunny as his form drifted away in the wind. Only when the last bit of him disappeared did she turn her head to eye the one that sent him away. 

The agouti-colored male showed he was friendly, and under normal circumstances, Steph would have readily replied with the wag of her own tail. But her tail had not seen happiness since the death of Sunny. Nor would it now. She did not smile; her eyes did not shine. But, she offered a dip of her head to the stranger, to show she meant no harm. 

Steph was nothing if not polite, but it was difficult for her in this situation to seek out another. They would want to chat, exchange names, etcetera. Steph did not even want to open her jaws, let alone fake an interest in such meaningless conversation. At least, to her, it was meaningless now. She was a lost soul in a vast world of uncertainty and she had no idea which direction would hold her new normal. Would she even ever find a new normal? Did she even wish to try and seek it out? 

She thought of her mother, @Valette, then, and what she had been through. If Valette had ever felt like this, she had not shown it to Steph. She only showed strength and the determination to move on with her life. Maybe she should return home. Maybe Valette could help her through this. Her mother had always been a beacon of hope. 

Internally, she still struggled with the decision of where to go from here. Home seemed like such an easy way. She could wrap herself up in her grief and mourn the way her heart wanted to. But, she feared if she gave in to it, she would never return from it. Somewhere, deep down inside, she did not want to be stuck in this dark place. At least her mind added some logic, but it wrestled with her heart, and there was no winner yet. They were still in the first round, and the fight would last for some time yet. 

But it wasn't so easy as to just let the time pass to see who the victor would be. She had to make a decision in every moment of every day. Like now. She could walk away from the stranger and never look back. She could wander her days away in the mountains. 

But, her heart and her mind were not the only players in this game. The basic instinct of survival showed itself in that moment. It did not care what the heart and mind wanted. It simply wanted to survive to the next day. Steph clung to that thought. She didn't need to pick the path of her new normal right this second. She need only to survive. 

And maybe this stranger could help her do that. She took the first step towards him, and then another, and then another, until the distance closed between them. Hello, she said simply.

The woman didn't seem responsive at first.
Like she was in a trance.
Like Maegi sometimes was.
He faltered, stumbling down onto a knee, but continued again.

He wondered if approaching was such a good idea now. Was this woman out of it? Would she start spouting strange things? He fretted internally until she turned to him, walking towards him.
His tail waved, level with his back.
Friendly, but won't take any shit.

"Hey," he chirped. Perhaps this will go well.
"Are you ok?" She didn't seem it to Rowan, so maybe asking was a good idea. Or maybe it was bad. He could only find out.

He stumbled, and momentarily, Steph's mind was brought to the present and she feared he had injured himself. But, he was back up instantly, and Steph calmed herself inwardly. He seemed young to her, but obviously not a pup. He still had a the innocent wonderlust that Steph could remember herself having. 

He seemed chipper, and normally Steph would have fed off that and matched his energy. But she didn't this time. She was relieved, at first, that he didn't go straight for the small talk. The she realized small talk was a lot easier to deal with than to answer whether or not she was okay. Was she? I... don't know, she settled on. Maybe she shouldn't have been so honest with a stranger, but her mind couldn't think of a lie fast enough. I'm just... lost, she added. And not sure where to go from here.

Sorry for the wait!

She seemed lethargic.
Slow and dim.
Not in the mind, but in spirit.
His tail waved unassuredly. Cautious, questioning.

Lost? Like, as in where they were?
His brow quirked as he thought for a moment.
"Well, uh, you can stick with me if you want?" He offered almost shyly. No, he couldn't be shy if he wanted to lead.
His head tilted up, "I'm going to start my own pack in those woods," he tilted his muzzle to the dark woodlands in the distance. 
He didn't know how to recruit someone, Marisol just kinda happened along and wanted to go with him so.
Aningan was right.

She regarded him, unsure of her own interest. She was not questioning whether he would make a good leader, or was able to begin his own pack or not. She did, however, question whether or not she was capable of giving her loyalty to anyone at the moment. I will consider it, she said. But I am unable to go now, I think, she added, her voice unsure. 

She was unsure of everything. The only one she was willing to make promises to were Valiant, because she knew she would never break a promise made to him. Or any of Sunny's children for that matter. They were the closest thing Steph had to children, though she had been careful to not try and replace their mother. She just wanted to be there for them.

His head tilted at her uncertainty.
Didn't she want like, help? A pack? Company?
He wanted to make her happier.

"You don't have to stay. I just won't feel right leaving you out here alone when you seem so lost," his eyes conveyed his concern as he assessed her.
He didn't want to leave her. He knew the wilds were dangerous now and all he wanted to do was get to the safety of his woods.
Oh, if only.
"Please?" He asked. Hoping she'd agree. Even if for a few days so he can get her something to eat. Lift her spirits. Maybe she'd stay.