Moonspear like a star that can't wait for night

So it wasn't all feeling.. but that and much more that Charon detailed well into the realm of greatness, even. He tried to keep this with him, no matter how overwhelming it did seem to conceptualize it out of nothingness. Jarilo scarcely knew what he wanted out of life's long run--so much that he had yet to figure out quite the companionship he needed around, besides what was just here thanks to other convenient reasons, so there were just a lot of places to start and maybe this talk could motivate him into figuring it out.

He wanted to think he understood at all. He did want to be proud and do his family proud at the same time too but starting from next to nothing, it seemed like a daunting, tall order right this very instant. Had his sisters ever wondered the same? Speaking of those siblings of his, he was mildly horrified at the thought of them all meeting some prospective mate of his, how nerve-wracking that could be.. and whether or not the faceless she in question could hold her own among them would surely be something he would wonder eventually... just like he had caught himself doing over Alya's three-legged speckled dude. But all of that was getting a little ahead, even if it was helping him make sense of this.

The yearling nodded anyway, despite the heavy look of concentration and how badly he wanted to mentally balk at all of this--especially when he had to bring rationality into the matter too, which he knew he should expect such a mention of logic from parents like his. Makes sense, I think. I'll remember.. he said, softer, and forcing it to stick with him somehow, hopefully. He supposed he could start at what did seem doable, as his father had put it: to get out and find out. Step one, he told himself. Do you think Mama and Alya thought about those things like that, too? he asked, head swimming. When did you know it was.. that for you? his brows scrunched, kind of vague about what that was. Mateship? Just courtship.. to the point of more than friends? Any of it??