Ocean's Breath Plateau The wreck of the day

Her thoughts whipped about inside her mind like stones picked up by a tornado, each of them a threat to her own wellbeing. So violently they were flung through her mind, she could not dwell on one for very long before it was replaced by another, one that brought her even more grief.

She made a fine victim of herself; a young woman often overlooked, now so desperate to be noticed that she had followed customs of a different culture without questioning what it meant to her. She had given her body to a total stranger, flirted shamelessly with a married man, and had begged another to wed her. 

She had thought she could potentially share her heart, so long as she had everything that she wanted…Chakliux made it seem as though both of his wives were content, without want for anything- and while she had never directly agreed that she would accept it if Dutch chose to marry another, she realized now that she might not have even been capable of telling him the truth. 

How blissful that blindness had been. She longed for it again, but knew that she could not have it. She understood now how jealous her own heart was- and felt her spirit spoil. 

She did not want to prepare her den, not now. While the thought frightened her, she wondered if she might feel relieved if for some reason she did not conceive. She tried not to think about it, tried to tell herself that she was over-reacting, but the whirlpool of doubt dragged her further in. She instead chose to hide, in plain sight- and wandered through Moontide’s territory wondering what she should do with herself now, and if she could summon the courage to talk to her mate about how she felt.