Ocean's Breath Plateau Out on the mira

Her heart felt bitter, and a sour taste worked its wat into her mouth. She remained pressed to his side, head canted against his shoulder, listening between her own ragged breaths to the story of his travels. It sounded as though she was forgiven for having given up on him; she felt shallow for not having the same kind of grace that he seemed to possess. 

She found herself wishing that he had turned his back on his brother, so that his son might not have suffered those hardships. She wished that he had left Valiant in whatever condition he was in so that she did not have to suffer the loss she had been certain was hers to grieve. She resented Valiant, and she resented Dutch's decision to delay his return for the sake of his brother's life. His selflessness was abrasive when she felt her own selfishness. 

I don't want to hear any more, She said quietly. She was tired; she knew she would not sleep yet, but she did not want to keep hearing things that would make her hate herself more.