Sleeping Dragon well, he talks like an angel but he looks like me
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She took in a metered breath and steeled herself against the storm she knew would come.  Everything was her fault of course; Terance could never take the blame for anything.  It was her fault for leaving, instead of it being his fault for not coming with her.  While on some level she understood that she had a hand in his emotional turmoil, she knew that he wasn't as faultless as he pictured himself to be.  He wasn't some kind of martyr for choosing his friend over his children.

Because that's what it came down to, wasn't it?  He'd chosen Sunspire over the formative months of his children, and he pitied himself for missing out.  He didn't hurt for his children, he hurt for himself. 

You had your chance to ask me to stay.  Her words came out as gentle as they possibly could, but there was not pity in her solemn gaze.  He had been so quick to make himself the victim even as the words had left her mouth.  He hadn't said, "Baby, no, please stay, we'll work it out," or "But you don't have to, there are other options," he had instead taken out his insecurities upon her — "Please send Okeanos and Ibis back when they're older.  It's unfair they have to grow up without a father, but I'd like to see what you make of them."  It's too late now.

It hit her then that maybe he'd never loved her at all, and very suddenly her heart twisted as she thought of @Lyra.  She had to wonder if she'd indeed been as terrible as Terance had made her out to be or if she as well had only been a victim of circumstance, touted as a villain when in reality, everyone involved had been at fault.

Where does this leave us?

There was no "us" anymore.  She'd co-parent with him as long as he chose to remain in the lives of Ibis and Okeanos.  But she had ruined "us" when she breached the subject of leaving, and he had ruined "us" when he had crafted himself into some kind of victim.  They are children, and they're hurting because their father isn't around.  It may take some time, but they'd be better off with you in their lives.  It isn't too late to repair what has been lost.

She takes in another breath, this one more unsteady than the last.  Her heart hammered in her throat as she gathered the nerve to speak.  But if you keep on the way you have, our children will grow up wondering why their daddy didn't love us enough to be around.  She did not yet know she was practically predicting the future, but it was the only one she could see.  You don't have to leave Sunspire to fix that.  He'd just have to grow up a little bit.

I'll move on the best I can, Terance.  But it's unfair to us both to keep going like this.  You can't heal if you don't want to.  She casts a glance over her shoulder.  I should be going.  The children need someone right now.  And if he didn't stop her, she'd leave, and this time she wouldn't be running away hurt.

She'd be walking away, healing, and able to move on.

[Image: 70c0c50922211f79c19a9fbb2dbe797a.png]
 
Messages In This Thread
RE: well, he talks like an angel but he looks like me - by Seabreeze - November 01, 2018, 08:13 PM