Deep in the heart of a never-knowing

Blue did not see the harm in the arranged marriage, if both parties were willing. However, when you were forced to marry another for the simple fact that it was desired of you. Well that was a ball game that did not fly with the black she wolf. Perhaps she had heard to many stories as she grew, of love and fairy tales. Blue was content, she was happy and she loved her children more than life itself. However, there was still a sadness there, of what could have been. Perhaps it would go with time. She hoped so for her sake and Lashers for it wasn't fair to him to be pining after one who was very probably dead.

Blue listened with ears erect. yes I will. He and I will have to talk, find out where we stand with each other. As i know we love each other in some capacity. It's very confusing I find. Although truthfully I don't think much of it. How about you my friend? Has any males caught your attention? Will they tame the wild wolf within? She teased her gently.

Have your life settled and quick to settle the one's of your friends too? Osprey's expression seemed to say, even though she didn't speak a word and lifted her eyebrows questioningly. Of course, she didn't hold this against her friend, nor did she thought that by asking that Blue willow had crossed and invisible border and pounced at very private matters. It was natural for her friend to care and, after all - hadn't Osprey been the one to start the subject?

"Decent males are hard to find," she replied, thinking of, how most of the people of the opposite sex she had communicated with were either females or males that were related to her in some way. "Maybe I am not meant to tend for the fire of the family, maybe my mission lies elsewhere," she mused out loud. "I mean we can all be "mothers" in our own way. You have your kids - as little, warm, cuddly and very much alive. Me - my stories are my kids. And in this aspect I beat you," she said jokingly and winked.

Blue gave her friend a smile. She would not have minded, if the question had been deflected. She was merely returning the same question in kind. Albeit a bit differently than the one she was asked.

Blue nodded her head, That is true. Blue listened, she didn't say anything at first. It was true though, family was not for everyone. Even love was not for everyone. She would have liked her friend to have it, but if she was happy and content with her life. Why push the issue. It is not for everyone, in that you are correct. I would love to see you with such things. But if you are happy with where you are, then I hold no argument.

Blue chuckled at the next part, yes my friend you have many more children than i.

"You never know, what will happen in the future," Osprey told her. People changed their minds constantly and even wolves weren't that different from them. You could have your routine boring life for many, many years. Then something happened and everything changed. A weakling and runt of the litter became and alpha. A strong and wise leader could die of very foolish reasons. A son turned against his father and a lady that had always been praised for her loyalty, suddenly cheated on them.

"I mean... the season is coming, I can feel that," she said, blushing beneath her fur and looking away, because this was a subject that she was not entirely comfortable to speak about. "Have you ever experienced "heat madness"? I mean - you live your life, you are all rational and smart and stick to the rules and then - wham - in a weeks time you throw it all out of the window and... yeah, enjoy life, I guess. Somehow rules do not matter then," she said with an awkward laugh.

Blue nodded in agreement. She knew that well, after all she had changed her mind. She had been traditional once upon a time. Had wanted it all the den, the husband, the kids. Now she had amended that, and in a sense she still had it all. She just shared her lover with other lovers.

Blue shifted uncomfortably, but nodded her head Yes I have. I usually try and stay away from others during that time. This year though I didn't and it's a most intoxicating madness is it not? Blue could not blame the males for their lack of decorum when a woman's season was upon the wind. They themselves were a few sheets of crazy, but it was instinctual. They could no more fight it than they could refuse to draw a breath.

"You can stay away?" Osprey looked at her friend incredulously, trying to decide, how much effort could this actually require from her, because in the gray she-wolf's case... "I am high during those days - I act like a lovesick fool," that had been her first heat two years ago. She would probably had ended up with a bunch of illegitimate cubs had it not been first for Peregrine, who had "shooed off" every suitor that had attempted to approach her, and kept her somehow in line. In the end it had left her with an impression that messing with men was a dangerous thing to do.

"And after it's over I can't remember half of the things I have done," she admitted. Though she had been pretty mad with her brother for interfering all the time at some point. "I hope that it gets easier with the years."

Blue chuckled and nodded her head. Yes I can, but I believe it is from my mother. She had taught me at an early age, that relations were not to be taken lightly. She also kept me hidden during the few times. After all we were travelers, any male could have gone after me. It's strange, though I will admit that I often fought her about it. Because I to was just wanting to go and carouse.

Blue frowned in thought, she wasn't really sure why it didn't affect her like others. Although this year it had, she had been on an intoxicating high for that week. Thank goodness Lasher had taken care of that need. Else she wasn't sure if she herself would have behaved. I hope it does too for you. Should I lock you away for the week? Like a princess on a mountain? Surrounded by guards and a moat.

"I would like to see you try," Osprey teased, having a good laugh at the image of Blue willow being the dangerous and not-so-friendly guard of her wayward friend's virtue. On the other hand - it was not that impossible. People, who were often looked down in the society for being too soft and caring, could do the most amazing things if their loved ones were in danger. And Willow - the most unlikely candidate for an aggressive fight - could be this person.

"But I am a big girl now and I can take care of myself. Maybe it won't be that bad either," she shrugged, hoping that all her worries were in vain and that the season would be mild and would not bring any big changes in her life. "Besides - you have your family to take care of and look after. What is the worst that can happen to me... I will have fun at least," she finished. The worst thing out of this probably was "getting buns in the oven", therefore she left this out on purpose. Also the fact that "unwanted pregnancies were easy to deal with" - she didn't want to upset her friend.

Blue Willow smiled softly, I would succeed I think my friend. Blue was not a violent wolf, she was not an angry wolf. She was however, a protective wolfess. She would protect those she loved with her last breath. She was finding out, now with children it was a feeling that was intensified.

Blue looked at her with wide knowing eyes. She knew what could be said after that, she also knew that they could be taken care of. She even knew many of the herbs to do it. Though she would not take happiness in it. If there came a time her friend needed those skills, she would offer them, regardless of how she felt about it. She would shed a few tears later. Just don't have too much fun. I do not look forward to dealing with Peregrine if something were to be too much fun. She gave her a cheeky grin.

"Is there such a thing as too much fun?" Osprey asked in an incredulous voice, but then burst out in merry laughter. "And you don't have to worry about Peregrine - he has his hands full with his wife and pack not to have time to run after his sister's suitors," though the idea was hilarious and - oh - how she missed him suddenly. A healthy dose of Peregrine... it was not there and then, but a little later, when she would go to see him and set things right.

"Alright, Blue," she said, getting to her feet and stretching out the stiffness of the joints and muscles. "I shall go and see, what can I fetch for you," if everyone else brought gifts than she was not going to be bettered. She was a decent hunter after you. "It was nice talking with you and - see you around. Soon," she leaned down to give an affectionate lick on her friend's forehead, then gave one last, loving look at the kids, and left the den.

ooc: last post from me. Thank you! And whenever you feel fit - I would love to have another thread with you.

Blue chuckled and nodded her head Yes there is. She knew there was such a thing as too much fun. It resulted in injuries and unwanted pregnancies. She shook her head at her friend. Thrilled with the way she was, she was a refreshing breeze.

She returned the lick to her friends face and watched as she left the mouth of the den. She enjoyed having her here, and she would look forward to seeing her again soon.

I would like that too :)