Verdigris Ravine us weirdos have to stick together, right?

Kusuma is still grieving and blaming herself :c coydrama

Days passed. Her belly grew louder and louder, as if her coming litter was a fire within her that no longer could be ignored. Kusuma had retired from her hunting duties, expecting new additions to tribe to come any day now. 

However, staying still was her downfall. More time not moving was more time to think and remember.

She lay in a shallow dip in the sand, shaded by the rock and hoping her pelt would hide her. A shadow, staring with golden eyes that drank every once of the sun into the dirt, the rocks. Letting the sound of wind pitifully drown her thoughts. Kusuma thought of Talisman, of all the words they never got to and never would share. Why had he defended her that day, and why did everything seem so very far away from reach? The only thing that she seemed to befriend was loss. 

One paw lay across her muzzle at the joint, curling around herself. She was the one whom he had come to find - surely his fate had been meant for her. And now, returning to the tribeland and feeling springsun on her back, darkwoman had barely talked to anyone since her arrival. A wolf had invaded and would have killed her if not for the coyjackal's lighter paws and better knowledge of the land, albeit it was a sliver of luck the one with more stamina was too heavy. Surely she had no need of announcing what could be smelt.

Unlucky.

Unwanted. She thought bitterly to the day black paw stepped once more to golden sand, K'oa's sharp words still biting her.

Unloved.

Dare she, unwelcomed.

Her nose ruffled the fur along her bloated belly, trying to comfort the kicking child and lull them back to sleep. It was her pup, more than she, that she was to be taken back. Was it not? K'oa looked angry enough to snap-bite her upon learning of Talis' fate. 

Darkwoman shook. 

Kusuma-litter would accept her, no? They would love her as much as Kusuma-love did. Maybe then, when they were born, she wouldn't feel alone anymore. She'd have a purpose. Maybe the holes in her heart would mend.

kusuma kept to herself, it seemed.

as he had done with s'ari, zoug meant to bring bits of meat to her den. but he did not want kusuma to fear as he followed her through the ravine, and so he left lizards and rabbit-meat and the occasional frog in the last known locations of the dark woman.

he found her this hour in a pitiful state, just as she moved to nose her own flank. zoug offered turtle meat to kusuma from a cracked shell and then sat back on his haunches.

the man did not speak, nor did he stare at her. he only took a vigil, watching the horizon in case she wanted to eat now.

And although she had no desire to eat, Kusuma found herself hungry. Must be the litter stirring inside her. They should eat, and in turn, she should. 

She picked up the turtle's meat in slender snout, gobbling it down without tasting. It would not agree with her later.

And she looked at Zoug, a man she once thought she wanted for half a second.

He, too, had chosen another, and maybe that was her own fault for not talking with him more, but a lot happened and frankly, his presence was not helping. 

Kusuma thanks Zoug. 

Just about the only act of kindness she'd gotten in recent memory that hadn't been clouded in an air of a freshly-painted image of despair. 

Its niceness felt hollow, as did she.

"kusuma have birth not in cave," zoug observed, the grunting tone of his voice leaving no indication as to his feelings.

he wished that she would. it was safer for them all.

but he knew she would not. there was a wound on her spirit, one unseen, but felt.

"kusuma let zoug close, bring more food? after?" if she wished to disappear into the ravine, then it would be so. but she could not nurse pups without eating. he could do this, at least.

Her eyes flicked with surprise. Kusuma has been digging den for litter. Not too far away. Maybe a short walk. Feels safer there. the admittance was painfully palpable to her tongue. Will bring back when Kusuma knows Kusuma is ready for litter to meet tribe. 

A soft wuff - a sigh out of her throat. all bad happen before litter takes first breath. No father, no ma to comfort Kusuma, wolf chase Kusuma halfway to wolfland and does not know how it affect litter. Kusuma wants litter to know quiet before bad luck finds its way to den.

her voice, smaller. but Zoug can bring food to Kusuma. Zoug will know when litter comes. 

Because Kusuma would disappear, and sun would dawn on the ravine without the black-furred coyjackal. Her scent shouldn't be cold, no? No. Not that fresh. 

Zoug could follow trail.

kusuma spoke more than he had heard. zoug was quiet. she wanted to be apart from them for her own feeling of safety. this he understood.

her frustration was clear. he did not know how to comfort her, and so only sat straight-backed and stiff with indignation on her behalf. 

kusuma trusted him.

"i find you," zoug grunted, answering her need for shadows, the pain she had faced, and the support she accepted from him with his rumble of assurance that he would provide.