Emberwood but you're still the same

Technically I'm tagging @Ibis because I wanna join UG BUT I would be super grateful if we could have a SEPARATE thread from this one so I can have the feels with Kavik! @Kavik

Grezig had no idea what she was doing back here. She’d been out of the Teekon Wilds for months. more months than she could remember now. She’d run into her daughter, Tizir, while she’d been away from the Wilds. This had been a happy event for her, for it had confirmed for her that her daughter was alive and had not been swallowed by the sea as she had feared. Like her son, Xizur, who was still missing, and assumed dead. Grezig sighed and pushed the thought of her son out of her mind. But that made way for her other son to come in. Illidan… She had forced herself not to think of him for a long time. She had no idea where he might be. She assumed he was still with Rusalka, if Rusalka was still there. (Grezig had left long before the natural disasters had affected the Wilds and so had no idea that anyone had moved).

The earth-colored wolf wandered nearer to the woods that were losing their leaves as winter approached. She had come here because she had smelled wolf activity nearby recently, and was hoping a pack lived here. With winter coming, she would need to join a pack if she hoped for better chances of survival. She’d been alone for a long time, but not in winter. There was some scent here, now that she was nearer the woods’ border, that was somewhat familiar… something from the past. But she couldn’t place her paw on it. She brushed it from her mind and tilted her head back to howl for anyone nearby.

sorry for the wait

He easily settled into his old ways, patrolling every chance he got in order to keep his mind from dwelling on all the things he'd rather not think about. And their borders were still new, so he wanted to make sure there was no question to whom this territory belonged should a stranger pass by. Before they had left the creek, the borders were so worn and his scent so ingrained in them, that he felt sure that anyone near them would know it was his; he aimed to do the same here—well maybe not solely his, but that it belonged to them. 

The howl made him lift his head from the rock he had been inspecting, and he stared in the direction of the sound as he marked the area. The voice sounded so familiar, but he couldn't figure out why. As he made his way there, a familiar scent filled his nostrils and it took a few seconds before he realized who it belonged to. Grezig. But how? How was she here now after so long of not seeing her? Did she know he was here? Dozens of questions swarmed his mind, and he increased his pace in response, his heart beating against his chest in anticipation of seeing an old friend. And when he arrived, there was Grezig; for a moment, it was like he was back on the plateau. Sadness crept into his chest, squeezing his heart painfully. He stopped in front of her, disbelief in his expression. Grezig? he murmured. How did you find me? He assumed that was why she was here; it was too much of a coincidence otherwise.

She saw him step through the trees and her mind spun. He looked… exactly the same. And the way he said her name… She closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath, half expecting that when she opened them, he’d be gone. But he wasn’t. When she opened her eyes again, he was still standing there, staring at her as if she were a ghost. Memories flooded her mind, though she felt too numb to be overwhelmed by them. The feeling most strongly coming through was shock.

“I…” she began. Her voice cracked, so she cleared her throat awkwardly. “I wasn’t… looking for you. I… thought there was a pack smell here and I… I need somewhere to stay in the winter.” What was she to do now? Ask to stay here? With him? After… after all that had happened between them and after she had left the Plateau? What if… “Is—is Liri…?” She could not even bring herself to finish the question. Was Liri here? What would she do if he said yes? Obviously she’d turn away and go somewhere else… but would she, really? Was it some kind of sign that the first wolf she had met on her return was Kavik? Not that she believed such nonsense, but… it couldn’t be ignored. 

And now that she had found him, she wasn’t sure she could let him go again, even if he couldn’t be hers. Her children were gone or dead. Illidan had still been with Rusalka when she’d left but… he had never been close to her, no matter how close she had tried to get to him. Her “mate,” such as he had been, was gone or dead. Rusalka… was far away from here. And she’d hated it there. She’d hated the ocean. No. She would not return to see what had become of them. She would stay here.

If he let her.

Oh, right, he quickly replied, feeling a little embarrassed about his assumption. Of course she had just been curious about the scent of a pack; her world didn't revolve around him. but he hated the thought of her spending the winter alone, and so he had to offer...You're welcome to stay here. I am one of the leaders, and I know you're hard-working...I can vouch for you. He paused a second before continuing. If staying here is what you want, he quickly added. He didn't want to make another incorrect assumption or make her feel obligated in any way. 

Her next question made him freeze, a wave of guilt sweeping over him at the mention of his former mate. She's not—we're not— he swallowed. There were too many thoughts running through his head, too many things he wanted to say. A lot has changed since the last time we saw each other. Liri and I haven't been together for a while. He wasn't even sure where she was now or if she was even still alive. Guilt swelled in his chest again. He vividly remembered the day she returned to find him leading the creek, another woman pregnant with his children; he remembered it like it had happened yesterday, and he didn't think he could forgive himself for how things had ended.

Grezig supposed she felt a little better, what with Kavik seemingly feeling just as awkward as she did, stumbling over his words the same as she had. It was strange. He seemed to be the only one on Earth who could make her trip over herself so badly. 

No. No, that wasn’t true. Illidan had done that to her, as well. Why did all the boys in her life cause her to feel such awkward feelings?

Grezig smiled, a fleeting, ephemeral thing that left her face almost immediately. “Of course I want to stay here,” she said. With you. Forever. 

But the look on his face once she mentioned Liri made her own face change. Now she was frowning, ears pushed forward in concern, body tensing. Was Liri dead? Or… or worse? What was worse than dead?

Oh. Grezig’s entire body relaxed, and she had to forcibly prevent herself from smiling or laughing. Oh, they had broken up. Oh, he was not with her. That… that woman. She shook her head. That woman who had taken her in and given her a home. It was not Liri’s fault that Grezig had fallen in love with Kavik. But still. She wouldn’t say she was happy about it, especially given Kavik’s facial expression when he mentioned her, but… she had to admit that she was relieved. Relieved that she didn’t have to face her.

Grezig set her face into what she hoped was an unreadable mask. “I’m sorry,” she said. “You don’t have to talk about it.” She swallowed. “I lo—“ She shook her head, hard, at that Freudian slip that she’d almost let out. Her skin burned in embarrassment beneath her fur. Get a grip, woman! she admonished harshly. “I know you loved her,” she went on quickly, hoping he hadn’t noticed.

Good, he said with a dip of his head. You shouldn't be alone for the winter, he added. And it might help to have someone here that he was comfortable with, or at least he used to be comfortable with. Things hadn't exactly ended well for them back at the plateau, but that all seemed like so long ago. Right now, all he could see was his friend, someone he cared about, needing a place to stay. And he felt like having a friend around might help make the winter less difficult somehow. 

He shook his head at her apology. He didn't actually want to talk about Liri or anything in his past, not right now, and he appreciated her not pushing for anymore information. And he did notice the words she started to say, but he didn't let her know that. Instead, he took a step closer. He wanted to offer a reassuring touch of his nose to her cheek but decided against it, unsure how she would feel about it. How are you? he murmured into the space between them, eager to change the subject and to make sure she was doing okay. Why are you alone? With everything that had been going on, it wasn't safe for anyone to be on their own, he knew that all too well.

Kavik stepped closer to her, and she couldn’t help but reciprocate, moving closer towards him, as well. The fact that he felt comfortable moving toward her made her feel a little better and less awkward. He hadn’t brought up anything of their past yet, and it didn’t seem like he would. She hoped that meant that they could just… pretend it had never happened, maybe? Maybe they could just go back to being friends and pretend that nothing awkward had ever occurred between them.

’How are you?’ he asked her. ’Why are you alone?’

She let out a scoffing laugh, a simple puff of air escaping her nostrils. “Alone,” she repeated. “I’ve been alone for some time, Kavik. A lot has happened since we last saw each other, as you said. I lived with Illidan and his mother for a time in her pack. I had two children by a man I did not love, but was willing to give me pups. My son disappeared one day without a trace, and my daughter left the pack lands to go off on her own adventures.” She said all this with little to no emotion in her voice, as if she were reciting it from some boring book. “Illidan and I were never as close as I tried to tell myself we were. We drifted apart. So I left. I left the Wilds all together, met up with my daughter once to see that she was all right, and then wandered.” 

She sighed, a long and endless breath escaping her as if she would collapse to the ground and die. But she remained upright. “I do not know why I came back,” she admitted, looking at the ground between them. Slowly, she looked up again, into his green eyes. “But I’d like to think that meeting you immediately upon my return means something.” She fell silent then, holding his gaze, as if willing him to agree with her.

It sounded like her time since the plateau had been nearly as turbulent as his. He watched her with concern and empathy as she told him of her family, losing them, losing Illidan, and then leaving the wilds to wander. He was glad that she at least knew one of her children was alive and well; he knew well the pain of having no idea where your children were. I'm sorry you have been alone, he offered quietly. And I'm sorry about your son. As for the father she was not in love with, he felt a twinge of anger at the whole situation. He obviously didn't know all the details. But where was this man now? Maybe he died or was separated for some reason, but he couldn't help the irrational anger he felt at Grezig being left alone to deal with her missing children. 

He wasn't sure he wanted to bring up his own children since it was sure to bring the mood down further, but she would meet his daughter eventually, and he didn't want her to think he was keeping anything from her. My daughter, Lainie, is here with me. There were other...children. Five other children, but—they were all killed by a landslide just before I found my way here with my only surviving child. There, it was out, and he didn't want to say anything else about it. 

Her statement lightened his sudden despair some, and a smile curved one side of his mouth. I think it does, too, he answered softly. You're probably tired, he quickly added. Follow me, and I'll help you get settled in. He turned and glanced back over his shoulder, waiting for her to follow before moving any farther into the territory.

Kavik offered his sympathy, to which Grezig merely nodded silently. She was thankful of it, though she did not need it. She had long ago resigned herself to having essentially lost all three of her children, two to their own wandering souls, and one—probably—to death. 

Kavik then told a bit of his own story. He, too, had had children. Five! So many. So many more than her. A twinge of jealousy stole over her heart for but a moment, until he told her that he had lost them all. This knowledge nearly swept her paws out from under her. He had lost all his children… All but one. A daughter. Lainie. “Lainie,” she repeated, murmuring the word almost silently. 

It seemed that after speaking of his children, Kavik no longer wanted to speak at all. He admitted that he also felt their meeting meant something, but afterwards, he turned away to guide her into the pack lands. She nodded numbly and followed after him, her mind reeling.

[Exit Grezig w/ Kavik]