Hideaway Strath too soon

Rakas — oh, how he savored the sound of her nickname for him even in the maelstrom of his grief. He savored it greedily as if he knows he is about to sink to the crushing depths of the ocean and it is his last breath. It is the sweetest sound in the entire universe and the worst because he knows that this is the last time he will ever hear her say it. “Save your strength, my nightingale.” My nightingale whose song had been enchanting and alluring and captivating. Arturo trembles as she gasps out a sentence, like the ending of a love letter. Love always, Nightingale. A closure. An acceptance of an end. The end of the Teaghlaigh’s Queen. As Lotte drew in her last breath and became eerily still, Arturo wrenched his head away from her and Hemlock and vomited up his stomach’s contents, because his heart is shattering beneath the weight of the sky as it crushes him. He is no titan, no Atlas and he is not designed to handle this force. He has seen death time and time again, delivered it himself time and time again but Lotte’s death was not something he’d ever wanted to witness. Not something that he can take.

The Nightingale’s song fell to silence and that silence was deafening, pushing in on Arturo at all sides.

His breath is hollow and he nearly jumps out of his skin when he feels Hemlock bury her face against the crook of his neck. Because he sees but he is blind, hears but he is deaf, feels but is numb. “It’s not your fault, Hemlock.” He hears himself murmur to her mechanically: and it wasn’t. It wasn’t Hemlock’s fault, it wasn’t his fault…it wasn’t anyone’s fault.

All he knows in the moment is that he will never be the same again. He already feels it, feels himself being ripped asunder. If it meant not having to face the grief he realizes he would welcome the witch doctor back with open arms. His grief is great and he is ready to tear the Wilds apart, stone by stone if it would make any sort of difference.

“I can’t stay here. I don’t want to. I don’t want Teaghlaigh anymore and I don’t want it to continue on.” Why would he? In Arturo's mind, his reason is sound: it was his creation, and even so, it is a cursed legacy. It has been ever since Furiosa’s death. Besides, his only heir had failed him time and time again, disobeyed and done whatever she wanted to do without a moment’s pause to what her actions might cause. If the gangster was cruel before now he must be an absolute monster. Then so be it. If he’s expected to survive Lotte and continue on then he’s going to be the tyrant he’s been painted as to do it …because it’s the only way.

The old Arturo can’t come to the phone right now. Why? Oh, cause he’s dead.