Golden Glade in a house that's not a home

once-white paws tread through the underbrush with careful constitution. the air was strangely still, not a whisper of a breeze in earshot, leaving the heat of the summer bore down on his dark pelt. pike took to the forest to shield himself from the sun, traveling most frequently at night to keep cool. not that it mattered much anyway, his days back in the teekon wilds were quiet, lacking a soul to miss even in the light of the afternoon.

today was no different than the last, except perhaps that he was traveling in the daylight. he'd repeated positive affirmations to himself when demons settled around his skull, piercing daggers torturing the happiness he longed to protect. fighting needless guilt in silence as he travelled. he still hoped of finding his mother, one of his siblings, but each day seemed to take a little more optimism from him. he continued along, one foot after the other. 

he'd find something --  even if it wasn't family.

The trail he traveled endured forever. Yet, that was an obvious situation a homeless wolf agreed to. He had accepted his fate long ago, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t seek to alter the future. Collision had decided to forgo the wooded regions come nightfall. Last he did that he was ever conscious of the rattling the night brought forth. It was safe to say he found little comfort in the creatures that came to life at night.

The wafting scent of another had become stronger and stronger as he moved. He wasn’t sure around what tree he had picked it up and he was no longer sure which way to go to avoid him. Collision continued to eye every twist and turn that he could–alas his eyes fell on the gray silhouette that entwined with the shadows as easily as he himself did. Rays of sunlight occasionally entangled with the stranger and brought him to life. It was unlikely he was ignorant of Collision’s own near-by presence.

“Excuse me,” his voice echoed louder than he intended. As though his baritone needed time to catch the other. His pace drew to a halt and there he was–shouting at a strange man in the middle of a forest. Aye, it could go either way at this point.

if pike had not been a behemoth, broad and old enough to know better, he perhaps would have shuddered at a call from a another man -- a stranger. instead, he paused, ears flicking back towards the sound before his head followed its lead. his nose twitched at the scent that fell around him now. another loner. like himself.

need something? came the hoarse response, from two weeks of silence surely, i'm just passing through. his body turned with his gaze, facing the stranger fully now. a peridot hue flashed in the sun as he took a single movement into a small patch of sunlight, eyeing the stranger curiously. he made no other movements forward, giving no indication of hostility. he simply waited to see what the other wanted.

Collision wasn't certain of what he expected. Golden eyes observed the stranger. He was large like himself. Held the same darkened cloak. And according to the standard of the species--a nameless vagabond. His voice was a raspy croak. Perhaps he was dehydrated. Perhaps, also like himself, the abandonment of home rendered him alone for too long.

Legs reclined so that he could sit before the stranger. He meant no harm. Judging by the almost casual stance the foreigner held he doubted he was of malicious intent. While perhaps his words could be mistaken as a justification for his arrival it was also safe to assume he was explaining he sought no rivalry. Collision nodded in understanding, "I didn't mean to stall you on your way to--wherever," He gestured his head in the direction he had been travelling. As if to grant him permission to leave if he so chose.

Toes prodded the Earth and he found himself urged to engage in at least mild conversation. To ease the drumming silence he carried with him every other day, "I simply don't find too many loners. Pack wolves and their comrades--more so," He stated this matter-of-factly, "Where are you going?" Was there a destination? Collision found himself wondering if he was the only one with no direction whatsoever. Additionally, he considered if he was being rude, "Apologies, my name is Collision,"

as the trees shifted in the canopy above, the sun fell to-and-fro along his face. he studied the man opposite him with the same curiosity, noting his similarly gifted stature and the much-too-thin waist he head. pike noted it as the other sat back on his haunches -- confirming his status as a loner just as the man verbally announced it. 

wherever was certainly a better destination than pike had planned out. 

a battle waged as he contemplated his next words. careful but not collected, bordering on the edge of overthinking. his still face gave no mention of the war, which was simply over what to do. stay? or go? it was not often like pike to stay, finding solitude even amongst the camaraderie of a pack. but he promised himself he'd turn a new leaf, and so the dark wolf sat back himself. i guess i haven't seen much of anyone at all, he returned in agreement. truly, it had been radio silent much of his journey, even the small portion he'd had since arriving in the teekon wilds.

wherever, he added, a small try at a joke. if his destination was family, he wasn't sure he could even name a place. they'd find him if they were here -- somewhere. and i'm pike -- don't s'pose last names would benefit me at this point. 

pike wondered if that was a weird thing to say -- he only was justifying in his head not claiming his parents names after all these years. he moved on swiftly. you headed anywhere?

Collision was unashamed, though exhausted, of being a loner. He had spent years in a space of purposelessness. Something he would not digress to a perfect stranger.  Furthermore, the feat of discussing his emotions was lost on him. A typical male struggling with feelings. A cliche.

 There was something to be said about the scarcity of others. It was almost comforting, yet somehow, equally daunting. The vacancy in the plain meant he was all the further from a pack. All the further from ending the persistent self-sufficiency. The questioned remained: would finding just any pack be the answer to his timeless lack of duty. No. He couldn't just go anywhere. Risking another Reneian Empire fiasco would only delve him deeper into the throes of abjection. 

 Wherever. At least that was an answer. One that didn't carry the same weight as Collision's mantra of 'nowhere'. Inked lips turned upward into a ever-slight smile. An amusing thought to himself. Perhaps he would begin to claim the same. 

 "Don't suppose they would matter at all myself," Collision held little weight here. His family had all been those he housed himself with. There was no blood to mar his name, "Unfortunately I'm a lost-soul myself. If there was a destination I doubt they would take me back," As if he hadn't tried to return to the area he had once called home. They were all one. Perhaps, for him, it was for he better. Too many broken promises. 

 "Does it get to you? The quiet? I find myself adjusted one moment and miserable the next. You might be the most interesting thing that's happened in weeks," A chuckle--though tepid found itself coming to life. The confession, likewise, was grim. If this was the highlight of his week he needed to get a life. He needed to get one anyway.

in his own world of travels, being a loner was only an avoidance tactic. pike himself had spent many months within a pack just to keep nature's cruelty at bay, and he imagined his stomach would be caving in had he not resided at the last pack for as long as he did. it was amber that he stuck around for past winter, and amber that he'd left to travel alone once more. this time, maybe with less self-loathing -- for pike's content-ness with being a loner never had anything to do with his love for being alone with his own thoughts.

if he had been more of a people-person(wolf-wolf?), perhaps he would have pried at the mention of being a lost-soul. instead, pike merely wondered if that was how he could describe himself. if angst could befall a grown man as hard as it did him, perhaps his soul was lost. that's too bad, pike replied, in a manner that maybe could have been construed as encouraging or apologetic. 

a chuff of a laugh rippled from his chest, just at the notion that he could be so interesting. i can't imagine i'm a sight for sore eyes, he said back, a rare gleam sparkling from his gaze -- amusement was so fitting on the son of terance. i think i'm used to the quiet, it lets you hear everything else. then a pause, as the summer cicadas sang their melodies in the distance. 

what's stopping ya' from finding somewhere new? he asked, ever the conversationalist and ever the hypocrite, if you're miserable, i mean.

It was fair to assume they had both, metaphorically, dropped the ball in one way or another to end up in the predicament they found themselves in. While the outcome of their beginnings was likely same--there was no telling the depths of depravity their stories went through to end up, well, here. Collision's was a story of hope. Dreams crucified by misplaced trust. At the end of the day he had gone from the betrayed to the betrayer and was the last to forgive himself.

Pike was right. It was too bad. Collision shrugged his shoulders and tossed the thought away. It didn't matter any longer though. Did it?

  "I can't imagine you would be either, but here sit two grown men discussing the woes of their own tragedies, no?" Perhaps Pike hadn't quite indulged to the depths Collision had already ventured, but he still showed some form of remorse--perhaps apprehension at something so simple as a surname. There was something to repel a more caring individual. Collision's knowledge of The Wilds was much more limited than others--at least he assumed.

  

The question was one Collision had arrived at plenty of times. He had also tucked tail and run from it like a scorned child, "Myself," The answer was quick. Only so because he knew the answer without any thought. The next laugh was awkward. As though he had overstepped. Regardless, the door had opened, "I suppose I'm a walking contradiction. To be in the open arms of a pack would be, honestly, endearing, but I'm in search of a cause-to serve. And that cause must, also, serve me," And it was rarely a two-way-road. He didn't want to owe his everything to someone that owed him nothing, and yet he wanted something.

a half earnest smile was earned to the comment about tragedies. pike could certainly call his fathers death a tragedy, one he'd spent 3 years grieving in the unhealthiest of manners. privileged he was to have such an event be his only one, and ask did he not about collision's own tales in any specific detail. who would've thought, he returned with a flick of an ear.

cause to serve... pike echoed as collision's sentence came to a close. perhaps that sat well with the tiger shark, amber had always said he needed purpose. family felt as good a purpose as anything, but maybe he was sitting too long with with feet in the past. maybe? no, positively. thoughtfully, he responded, i think that's what i'd like too. 

he glanced off through the woods with another flick of his ear. have you met any of the packs around here? maybe it just takes one wolf you find worth in to bring you into their ranks, he asked, gaze returning to the man opposite of him, ya know, a friend to fend for and vis versa? truly, pike didn't mean anything by it, but there was a question that could be found as he shifted his weight. 

He, admittedly, found himself enjoying Pike's company. While they did nothing at all they were accomplishing quite a bit. Occasionally being afforded to say things out loud with another allowed the thoughts to root deeper. As in most things their species thought better as a unit. They were never intended to live the lives they had been henceforth assimilated to. Collision, for one, admitted he felt adrift in an endless sea.

"It does sound nice, doesn't it?" But sometimes the cause you chose to serve didn't need any input. There would be no chance or change. Collision was well aware. Maybe it was fate or some other spiritual intervention. He didn't like that idea and stirred from it.

He hadn't met a single pack. A boy that had been roughed up by family--a loner. A man that shared the same poor storyline as himself--a loner. Perhaps he was on the cusp of finding one, but "No, admittedly I'm only half-decent at conversation and probably less than decent at appealing on my own behalf despite my needs," Again. A walking conundrum, "So, it leaves me to assume neither of us have any friends. It is sound advice, but we're not doing anything about it," Collision chuckled but briefly and darted his eyes away.

A constant walk holding the hand of insanity. They wanted change and yet would do nothing to change it.

oops, sorry! i got so distracted lol

mmm, came a thick, thoughtful hum from pike, who was in no place to judge. still, maybe a part of him was -- but it came from self-loathing rather than a disdain for the stranger opposite him. 

the world's smallest violin played softly in the background as pike took time to consider what to say. truthfully, he felt this man was better conversation than he could ever be -- proof in the silence that slunk around them. both of their eyes averted, a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach. guilt? shame? just avoidance? the goliath took to his feet, gaze falling back on collision with a small smile, the whisper of one, at the corner of his maw. perhaps the next time we cross paths things could be different, he said with an earnest tone, green eyes narrowed, i should return to my uh, wallowing, i s'pose -- i'm sure you've got some to do too.

Pike seemed friendly enough, truthfully. Collision needed to swallow his pride and metaphorically jump in. If he drowned then so be it. He was choking on the lingering lonliness anyways.

"No, I think it's time to stop my wallowing," Collision looked at him. There was a resolve in his eyes, but to be fair there was concern as well. What was next?

  "I do need to go. I wish you the best of luck, Pike. You seem like you've got some good in you. I wish you the very best. I hope our paths cross again on a better day,"

  Collision would leave. Parting ways with a man that was still considered a stranger to him, but admittedly, it had been nice to bounce his thoughts off of someone other than his reflection. The short company was appreciated and the future held answers for them both.

[exit]