Broken Boulder the curse of delight singing-sunlight

haha he's totally a mood killer isn't he. he doesn't believe alarian but he wants to -- oh does he want to -- so he smiles anyway, trying to make his expression brighten, because he wants it to be true, so maybe if they're both willing to pretend it's true it's close enough. to this point he says, "i am too," and he does mean it -- well, sorta -- he likes being here, he likes alarian, it's just the despite everything. it's always the despite everything.

alarian's sometimes gets a half smile but no other acknowledgement. unlike his friend, delight is build for emoting. uncontrollable, unstoppable emoting. "i'm sorry," he says abruptly, sucking down a deep breath, "for, uh, y'know. all of it, and being kind of -- being -- i haven't been present. i feel like i'm a fog or something, it's hard to -- well. still. you've been great and i've been kinda shitty, is what i'm getting at, so." delight weakly smiles, but his moonsharp eyes are big and anxious, self loathing writ clear across his delicate face. it's not like it's untrue -- the other members of bracken have made their feelings about delight's presence pretty clear. and he knows, too, he's not himself, watching as if out of body as he floats through conversations, untethered. god he misses seabreeze or anatha or gracious or jomyo -- and okay, maybe he'd been a little spoiled by all the kind women in his life keeping him on track, and maybe he's overdue for this treatment, but still. it fucking hurts.