Hushed Willows Does it mean anything to you?
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#1
All Welcome 
At the nameless Moor.


So, this was home.

She didn't know for how long, since they apparently kept on moving. Ibis decided upon setting foot in this new place, she wouldn't get attached. It would just hurt more when they left again.

As she moseyed along, head downcast and body slumped with an early onset of prepubescent woe, she found that the ground turned red. More than red, really. A hearty crimson took hold of the earth where the flowers began, and soon she was surrounded by blossom after blossom; any other time, Ibis would've been awed by the beauty.

Right now, she was thinking about daddy. But she didn't want to. With a huff, Ibis kicked at a bushel of flowers and watched them split in to a gush of petals; she felt a sharpness catch against the palm of her paw and winced backwards with a squeak, and stared down at the puddle of ruined roses, as if they'd bitten her. Or made her daddy stop loving her. Either way, she was unhappy.
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#2

She hoped that they were done moving.  It had been hard enough for her to leave Sunspire behind (and the Sanctuary as well, although it'd been easier with the ever-present scent of cat urine).  She couldn't imagine how difficult things were for her beautiful children.

Ibis did not seem to be acclimating.  She knew that her baby girl wanted her father; she wished that they had been good enough — important enough — to make him stay.  But never would she let these feelings rub off on the moments she shared with her children.

She caught sight of her little sprite near the communal dens, in the rose-covered moorside and trailed towards her with a gentle smile, but it breaks as her beloved cries out.  Her pace quickens as she moves next to her babe, and her nose finds its way to the top of Ibis' crown. 

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#3


She's staring at her open palm when her mother approaches, and doesn't look up until she feels the soft boop on top of her head. Ibis glances at her mum but doesn't reciprocate the physical affection, and glares back down at the thin red line that's forming. She flexes her toes, tests her paw against the ground, and finds no issue. The thorn might've knicked her but Ibis doesn't feel the sting of it anymore.

Ibis holds it out for her mom to inspect, and murmurs, Flower bit me, mummy.
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#4

She's failed as a mother.  She knows it in her heart.  She's taken this beautiful singing child and ruined her.  Ibis doesn't even move to kiss her back!  Seabreeze's heart twists painfully in her chest but her countenance remains calm and steady.  Her children need nothing else to worry about.  Not now.  

She peers at Ibis' wound and licks the bottom of her paw.  It seemed that it wasn't too deep, and it was hardly bleeding anymore.  It didn't even really need treated, but she wanted her daughter to feel special... she wanted her daughter to feel loved and valued.

Do you want mommy to take care of it? she hums, pulling her head back to gaze lovingly at her growing baby girl.

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#5
She didn't say anything when her mother offered to care for the cut, but she didn't stop her either. Whether Seabreeze tended to the tiny sliver of red or not, Ibis was being her usual self — emotional, bereft, over-the-top dramatic, the works. She refused to speak again until after her mother made a show of carefully easing her pain (real or imagined).

But afterwards, she blurted: Why didn't daddy want us.
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#6

She tends to the wound upon Ibis' paw with all the love and tenderness in the world, and when she'd finished she made to pull Ibis close.  To feel the warmth of her daughter against her was the most rewarding gift she'd ever been given.

But even in this paradise, everything cannot be so.  Ibis' question causes her mother's ears to flatten, but she is quick to regain her composure.

She wants to say — "Oh baby, he does want us,"
to say — "Daddy will be here soon,"
to say — "It isn't so!"

But she could not lie!  If they had been good enough for him, Terance would have been here with them, like she'd asked.  If Terance had followed, they might still be in love.  Their family might be whole.  But Rannoch or the Sunspire had been more important to him, and there had never been a question about whether or not Terance would come.

He never would.  They'd never be good enough for him.  She gathers in a breath and licks the top of her little bird's crown once more.  To tell the truth now would save her daughter a world of heartache.  Daddy loves you, she says, for she knows that much to be true.  But sometimes, people make choices that .. don't have the best interest of other people in mind.  Daddy chose to stay behind with his best friend instead of coming with us.  It doesn't mean he loves you any less.  It just means his priorities aren't straight.  I'm sorry, baby girl, that I couldn't make him stay.

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#7


The attempts that Seabreeze made to fix things, or at least convince Ibis that things would be alright, fell a little flat. Not for lack of trying—but the more she listened to her mother's voice, the less she believed her. If daddy loved her, and Okeanos, he should be here. What could possibly come between them that was more important? Her eyes became glossy as she thought of this (albeit in more basic terms), although no tears fell. She was getting tougher.

I sorry too, mama. She cooed, wanting to dwell in her anger and her hurt for a bit longer but finding it too difficult. Things needed to get back to normal. It wasn't mama's fault that this had happened and taking it all out on her was unfair—but Ibis was still a selfish little girl. She wanted to commiserate with her beloved mother but instead she let the conversation die there, unaware of the implication of her tiny comment—almost like she was agreeing, and blaming Seabreeze for all of it. 

Really, she blamed nobody. Ibis had no concept of the struggle between her parents, and was merely caught in the middle.
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Lucky for Ibis, Seabreeze did not take it that way.  Instead she breathed in the smell of her daughter and noted the way it had changed over the season.  No longer did she smell like her mother's milk, or the mountain, or her siblings (as much), but instead she had begun to take on a sweet smell of her own.  How long until this one changed, too?

I want to tell you something, though, she said, soft gaze pointed down at her baby.  You're entitled to your hurt.  You're allowed to not understand what is happening, and you're allowed to ask questions about it.  Mama will help you through it.

But you can't hold onto it forever.  It's not good for us to always have this seed of hurt in us, because after a while it grows and becomes part of us, and then it's harder to get rid of.  Sometimes, it changes us forever — for better or worse.  So you hold onto it for as long as you need to, but when the time comes, mama will help you let it go.

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#9
Her mother had some advice for her, and even if she had wanted to avoid it there was no way to do so. She didn't understand most of what Seabreeze was saying but the tone of her voice, that motherly affection and careful sort of love, came through clearly enough. She listened. Ibis tried not to think too hard about things; her hurt was too much, but mommy said it was alright. Ibis did not have any questions though. If she did, she would be sure to ask her mother — but the girl was a bundle of emotions and couldn't properly formulate how she felt or what she wanted, in to questions. At the tail end of her mother's pronouncement, Ibis squished herself against her mother's legs and burrowed her nose against her fluffy side (or tummy, whatever part was fluffy and nearby) and murmured through her fur: Lob-oo-mehmeh.
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#10
She wasn't sure if Ibis understood or not, but it really didn't matter.  Seabreeze knew she'd be here for her children no matter what, unlike her blind, selfish ex-husband.  What mattered was that Ibis seemed to calm at the words (or the tone of the words) and buried herself into her mother's fur.  I love you to, little bird, more than you could ever know.
[Image: 70c0c50922211f79c19a9fbb2dbe797a.png]