Whitefish River To make you feel my love

@Malila @Mohe @Emrik @Spica @Syrma
others are welcome once emrik and the pups have all posted at least once
some pp with emrik, lmk if i need to change anything
set for 6/10, early morning, just before sunrise

The last few days had been spent resting and preparing thanks to Hieronymous generously helping with Ira. She still made sure to stop by once every couple days just to make sure everything was still going well, but mostly, she had tried to finally listen to everyone and rest as much as she was able. She had taken a lot of naps, often with her mate who also seemed very happy to see her finally taking it easy. She really had no choice this last week as she had almost no energy. Preparing their den for the arrival of their children had taken her the better part of the last week since she took frequent breaks to eat or sleep, but last night, she finally felt like things were ready. Emrik had helped her make a bed of leaves and pine needles that they had been sleeping in, so now it was soft and broken in and would be perfect for delivering the puppies. She had plenty of plants nearby in case she needed them, and she had taken to eating borage leaves the last couple days to make sure she had plenty of milk. So now all she had to do was wait, which was far more difficult than it seemed. Without tasks to take her mind off things, her thoughts would often turn anxious as they drifted to the upcoming delivery. She tried to take her own advice and not worry about the things she had no control over, but it was difficult. 

What made things even more difficult for the healer was the fact that her daughters were still so angry with her. She honestly hadn't expected such a reaction from them; she thought they would be excited to have little brothers and sisters to help take care of and teach things when they were older. Now she had no idea what to do about it and often found herself reduced to tears over the whole thing. It only made things worse that Acheron left. He told them before he left that he was already planning to leave because he wanted to explore the world on his own, which she definitely understood, but deep down, she couldn't help but think it was all her fault. First with the stuff about their father and then with the news that there would be new additions to their family—it was hard not to think she was to to blame. She could only hope that the girls would eventually come around and that Acheron would visit soon like he promised. But until then, her daughters' anger was like a storm cloud over any happiness she felt as the family neared the puppie's due date. 

Still she managed to sleep most of the night, sprawled out on her side against Emrik; it was the only way she could sleep and still be able to breath. She had felt some contractions the day before that were far more intense than the cramps that were normal with late pregnancy, and so she was expecting the puppies any day now. So when she woke in the early morning darkness to a squeezing pain in her abdomen, she wasn't at all surprised. She hadn't quite remembered how painful the contractions were until now, strangely enough. The one currently working its way down her abdomen made her sit up and suck in a breath. She held the breath for a few seconds before remembering to let it out and draw in a deeper one as she rode out the pain. When the pain subsided, she reached over and nuzzled her mate to wake him if he wasn't already awake. Emrik? she said softly. The babies. She gave him a look mixed with excitement and fear; she had done this before and knew what to expect, but fear still lingered in her mind—she worried about them all being delivered safely, and she worried there might be problems, but she tried not to focus on those things, something that would be made easier once the labor progressed. 

It was an hour or so before the contractions became more steady and frequent. She had gotten up and lay down multiple times, sometimes preferring to pace the den and sometimes preferring to half lay down with her front half propped up against her mate. She was immensely grateful for his presence. 

It wasn't much longer before the pain and instinct guided her to push. She braced herself against Emrik and did as her body urged, pushing with the contraction. She repeated this many times (she was too focused and in too much pain to really count) until finally their first child was born. Speedy immediately reached over and cleaned away the sac and bit through the umbilical cord that attached the little puppy to her placenta, which she promptly took care of as well. The first was a little girl, delicate and cream colored and perfect. Speedy pulled her close and waited for her to start feeding before collapsing back against her mate. She knew she wasn't finished, so she savored the break while she had it, the tiny sounds of their first born warming her heart and bringing tears to her eyes. 

It was maybe half an hour at the most when the pain started again, and she shifted forward again, bracing against the contraction and breathing through it. The need to push came more quickly this time, and she leaned back a little against her mate again as she began to bring their second child into the world. She had to push a little longer with this one, but with one big, final push they were born. She repeated the same process—clean and detach from the placenta. When the puppy was clean and everything taken care of, she pulled him to her as well. Their second was a boy; he was a rich dark brown and just as perfect as his sister. Once she felt him start to feed, she relaxed against her mate once more. Her weary gaze drifted to the den opening where the soft light had just started to illuminate the floor of the den, and then they closed as she took the time to rest. 

She ended up falling asleep, exhausted from what the birth had taken out of her, but she woke with a start only an hour later. She looked down to the children, and they were nestled against her, content and sleeping. She released a soft sigh and lay back against her mate once more. I think it's just these two, she told him quietly. Malila and Mohe? she asked him with a yawn. She was still exhausted but she wanted to watch them sleep for a bit—admire them with her husband next to her presumably doing the same. They were so small and she already loved them more than she could bear. The tears came again, but she didn't care; she just rested her head against her mate and continued to watch their son and daughter sleep. Maybe once Spica and Syrma saw how perfect their new brother and sister were, they would have a change of heart. Speedy held on to that hope for now.

it was warm here. comfortable. he felt everything and yet was unaware he had yet feel anything. it was dark, yet he also did not know the warm glow of light. sounds had made their way to him in his residence and they had been exciting. the gentleness of his mother's voice something that would soothe the babe when he began to writhe and wriggle. the different tones of others that came and went. he had no idea what any of it meant. he had no idea that soon he would become another part of the unit he had silently experienced. all he knew was that, for now, he was happy. 

 then things began to change. the environment he had been accustomed too seemed to move around him. what was going on? the babe signaled alarm in the only way he knew how. he began to move himself. swimming and struggling. then it all seemed clear. where he must go. and go he did. 

 there was instantly so much going on. his first breathe of raw air as his mother's tongue danced across his wet body. the loss of the safeness he had been feeling. the warm, and yet somehow still cold, air. he squeakd a dramatic squeak until he felt the grasp of his ma. her grasp guiding to him to what he yearned for, but did not recognize. she offered him food to quell his hunger he would take to it. hungrily, easily: mother's milk. and then the babe would slip into slumber against the warmth of his mother's body and the other familiar that was his peaceful sister.

 what was all of this for? what was happening? but minutes old and nothing more than a brown blob. he was enduring experiencing things he had not yet made associations to. one thing was quite clear. everything was going to change. suddenly, it already had.

His easy slumber had been interrupted at Speedy’s much deserved insistance. Despite the sleep that cling to his eyes, Emrik smiled broadly when he realized what was happening. Their children! They were coming now. There was a knot in his stomach. Of course he was nervous, and worried about Speedy. But he trusted her, she had done this before, and she was a medic.

He didn’t show his nerves, keeping as calm as possible as the woman paced back and forth, settled against him for a couple minutes and then started the cycle all over.

When the time finally came to push, Emrik whispered words of encouragement to her. Remaining stead and strong as she braces against him. He hadn’t thought it was possible to love Speedy any more than he already did. But he was proven wrong in this instance. His admiration and affection grew as she struggled, even as guilt at himself twisted his stomach. She was in pain, and he had contributed to it.

When his daughter was finally brought to the world, Emrik couldn’t stop the gasp that slipped from his lips as Speedy cleaned her and nestled her against her belly. Sifting slightly to get a better view, Emrik watched his little girl with such love and caring. That was his daughter! His daughter! ”She is so beautiful.” He spoke the words in awe, but not to anyone in particular. He simply could not hold the scentence in any longer.

Again the pain started for Speedy, and Emrik continued his kind words and encouraging noses. His son was second. And Emrik was once again taken with the boy instantly. A boy and a girl. His Malila and Mohe. His children.

Of course he loved step children very deeply. And just like the latestest additions to their family, Emrik would do anything in his power to protect them. But he knew, deep down, that this was different. Not in the way he would treat them, no he saw them all as his children, even when he wasn’t wanted. But these two. He could do right by these two. He hadn’t been a large part of Speedy’s previous litter, he had always felt like he had abandoned them. But these two. These little ones would never experience life without him. He was sure if it.

As Speedy relaxed further against him, he smiled down at her and their pups. ”I love you Speedy. They are perfect.” Casting a glance down at the sleeping pups, Emrik nodded, ”Malila and Mohe.” He confirmed.

Peacefully wrapped in the warmth and safety of her mother's womb, it was the only world Malila knew. Everything was constant. The distantly felt presence of another beside her, the muffled vibrations of voices from beyond. Even the faint pulse of her mom's heartbeat, unheard yet resonating throughout her being.

But then things changed. The space around her tightened...grew cramped. Suddenly she felt too big for this vessel, and she didn't like it. As the world seemed to shrink around her, tugging her forth with an invisible force, the golden child followed along. Pushed from one reality into another, the warmth that she loved so much was suddenly gone! A wave of ice washed over her, something solid and wet beneath her new body. A tiny, delicate mouth opened, lungs expanding to inhale the very first of life-giving breaths. Out came warbling cry of protest, yet also of declaration that she had made her debut.

The ushering sweeps of a tongue warmed her, dried her. Ceased her terrible shaking to mere faint trembles. Nestled then against something warm and dry, Malila instinctively huddled close. This was much, much better! Finding a teat blindly but easily, she latched on and was rewarded with the thick, rich sweetness of milk, warming her to her core. Oh, now this wasn't so bad! In fact it was wonderful! Soon someone else...perhaps the other from that same shared space, had joined her side. Swiftly she was satiated, white little dribbles foaming at the corners of her mouth. Thoroughly exhausted, she drifted off into slumber.

making assumptions over Syrma, pm me if I need to change anything and I will edit :)

Like usually, Spica was hanging with @Syrma when the scents of newborns filtered into her senses. It wasn't like anything she had smelled before -- that she knew of, anyway -- and she cast Syrma a puzzled frown before going to have a look. Do you think that's...? she wondered, not usually one to cut her sentences short, but now not sure what to say. the pups? them? the little bitches? ... our replacements? Anyway, a lot of things to say, but none of the words crossed her lips in the end.

Just as Spica arrived, she heard Emrik's voice come from the den. I love you Speedy was about to send Spica into a roll of her eyes and a joke gag reflex in her twin's direction, but the next bit of the sentence cut her short and she stopped just a few meters short of the den.

They are perfect.

Of course, she and Syrma already knew the pups were their replacements, the real deal this time, made with the mate she actually loved instead of some distant father who was Alpha of some pack and whose entire family hated them with a passion. She looked at Syrma, a look of hurt seeping through to her face. Spica wanted to shout something mean and nasty towards the den, but she decided against it because the words just didn't get to her. She just kept mulling over Emrik's words and hearing them again and again and again in her head --

They are perfect.

-- And then she just bit down hard, clenched her jaw and turned away, assuming her twin would follow suit. Spica just wanted to be alone -- alone with Syrma, that was -- and she just wished she could un-do the birth of these stupid puppies so that they could be mom's number ones again.

Maybe Speedy or Emrik might realise that their smells lingered outside the den later, that they had visited, at least, even though they hadn't stayed.

Syrma had nowhere else to be besides with her twin, and though the thought of it scrunched her nose, the scent on the wind certainly inspired a bit of curiosity. She still didn't like any of it and did not expect that to change, especially in light of how alienated from the family it made her feel thanks to their reception of the news--and since then, she had largely steered clear of them to help make her point, not wanting anything to do with them. Thankfully, them all keeping busy with the pups already in the pack and such made it all very easy to avoid.

It must be... she sighed, answering her sister with a growing scowl and hardening look about her as it slowly began to set in. So the day had finally come then, and that was that; nothing they had to say about it was going to change anything for anyone besides themselves, that she had already accepted as begrudgingly as possible. To her, they had already set their sights on their picture-perfect little family, only needing to be made complete by the official arrival of these puppies to come.. which for all their resistance, left Spica and Syrma (with their controversial beginning, the enemies they had never even met, and new sibling-hating, make-mom-cry ways..) on the outside, or at least it certainly felt that way, even before she went avoidant about the matter anyway.

The yearling followed along and swiftly realized it had been a mistake to come here at all. Familiar voices murmured from the den and while her nose worked over the odd smells, her ears couldn't help but catch it too. Her heart sank to a new low then, and she shot a wide-eyed look at Spica as if to say really?? The twins had known it all along of course but to find it actually becoming reality hurt worse than she had been prepared for, even in all her anger towards them, and the distance she made. Now, it was just official and that was that.

She had no concept of what their own birth had been like, or what sort of welcome they had come into (probably no one going on about how perfect they were, given what they knew now!) but this just made her all sorts of uneasy all over again. Their father had been miles away probably, not caring, and they were the mistakes, hidden here away from his family that just wanted them dead. Not exactly.. a perfect scene, very much unlike the one waiting for their brand new siblings, who Speedy and Emrik welcomed wholeheartedly, without doubt, into a life that had so much waiting for them. Syrma's tail gave a nervous lash and she bumped her nose against her sister to steady herself, somewhat.

After, she only wanted to get far away. Further than before, if possible--it suddenly didn't matter where, exactly, just not here and not with anyone but her beloved twin. Her eyes stung and she felt tense.. just strange, overall, as she joined Spica on their leave which couldn't come quickly enough. She was determined to not look back and tried desperately to keep her mind off it, but that one especially was not easy.

She sniffled quietly and nuzzled Emrik. I love you too, she told him, her bleary gaze drifting over their son and daughter. Yes they are. And so was her mate. He was her one constant through this all, the one wolf she knew she would be there for her no matter what, and she couldn't imagine having this moment with anyone else. She leaned into him, resting her head half on her paw and half on his. 

She had just started to drift to sleep, comforted by the presence of her children and her mate despite the sadness lingering in the back of mind. But the scents of her daughter made her quickly lift her head; she could pick those scents out anytime and anywhere. Her heart began to speed up in her chest. Had they changed their mind? Did they come to see their new brother and sister after all? She looked to Emrik with a hopeful expression wondering if he had scented them too.

But they never came in. She wanted to get up and go outside to look for them, but she was tired and sore and she hadn't planned on getting up and doing anything until much later in the day. She looked to her mate again. I think the twins are out there, she told him. Would you mind checking? Maybe they were waiting to be invited in? Things had been tense lately. They had been avoiding her, and she hadn't pushed anything, so maybe they weren't sure they were allowed in.

omg! I thought I responded to this (?)

Emrik looked down at the two bundle as they drifted to sleep. They reminded him of Acheron, Castor, Syrma and Spica. When they were born. He remembered fondly how he had curled around them to give Speedy a break. God. To think that was a year ago. A year ago, they had been in a similar position, and they’re eldest children were curled against Speedy.

He too had caught the twins scent, and he smiled back at his mate. He hoped and dreamed that one day they might see him as they had when they were puppies. He hoped they would accept them as they’re father, that he could be there for them. Love them, and cherish them. Just as he would love and cherish Malila and Mohe. He tried not to let the sting of their words and the hurt of the actions affect him, but it was painful.

When they didn’t make an appearance Emrik grew worried, nodding softly at Speedy’s request. Emrik stood and headed out, but found only their scent on the breeze. They were no where to be seen. With a deep frown, Emrik took a few steps away from the den. Out of ear shot, Emrik sighed heavy sigh he sank into a seated position. His head hanging, and eyes falling shut. What were they going to do. He felt hopeless in this situation. He wanted them to all be a happy family, but it seemed that everything he did was wrong. He said the wrong thing when they were happy, he did the wrong thing when they were sad. And now. Now they didn’t even want to meet their siblings. Did they truly hate him that much?

Emrik surprised himself. He had never thought they actually hated him. At least not until the pregnancy reveal. Perhaps they really did hate him. But how did he fix that? He couldn’t leave Speedy, he would never abandon her, or any of their children.

On this day, which should be one of the happiest days of his life, Emrik cried. Something he hadn’t done in years. He was quiet. Mindful of his wife and newborns. But painful sobs cracked his chest, and air struggled to fill his lungs. His daughters, truly hated him. For now he needed a moment. He needed just a moment to compose himself before returning to Speedy.

She waited and waited, but her mate never returned. She grew worried, wondering if something had happened. But she quickly tried to reason that thought away; she hadn't heard anything outside to suggest a fight or anything really. Still, she worried. Maybe he had just gone to get food? Maybe he was just talking to to twins and they would all three come strolling through the den entrance at any moment. 

But no one ever came. She was curled around her newborn pups, golden gaze glued to the opening of the den for any movement. Eventually, she grew too worried and since she wasn't in the condition to get up and go outside just yet, nor did she want to leave her hours old children alone, she lifted her head and softly called out: Emrik? Where had her husband gone? Sweetie? Are you still out there? She waited for a response as the chirping of busy early morning birds filled the otherwise silent air.