Sleeping Dragon the things i do for love

*Hug2everyone!*

One thing that she never would have dared say outloud is that every wolf had their flaw and that even Queens were no exception. Lucani, of course, with her frustratingly ever-present tone of self-righteousness, had sundry flaws to her personality, and was unable to hide them as she faced her Alphas. Gyda's and Thuringwethil's most prominent flaws in her opinion were related to their youth, and exacerbated by their positions of power. Gyda was one of the most intellectually and emotionally competent wolves she'd ever met, of any age, yet now she stood with wilful naiveté, insisting that Lucani would recover (even though the four-year-old healer knew and had said otherwise) and, even worse, insisting that Lucani was of use now. The grey wolf was physically very weak and slow now — restoring medical caches would take a long time, and she needed them personally if she was to try and get better. She would deplete them faster than she could grow them. Furthermore, she couldn't fight or hunt anything other than fish. She could stand and spout knowledge, but other than that the valuable Gamma had become pup-like when it came to her useful attributes. In a weaker pack that might be fine, but in Sleeping Dragon there was a good chance she'd be killed for it by one of the wild survivalists that roamed the ranks.

In her medical opinion, that had almost happened already. That was why she was here. The poison sat heavy in her veins.

Thank you, Gyda. I care very much for you bo—. But she was interrupted.

So Gyda was in denial. But Thuringwethil's hiccup naturally came in a more aggressive form: pride. Lucani had seen it every single day she had encountered Thuringwethil, and it had never negatively affected her respect or love for the girl. Nor did it affect it today. She did believe one day the Heda would understand that this truly was the best thing Lucani could do for Sleeping Dragon — the alternative being ageing alone in a darkened cave, taking hours to reply to summons, unable to join fights or hunts, using up herbs and meat, taking up her Alphas' time, and by her very presence encouraging an atmosphere of disrespect as packwolves began to realise that dead weight was welcome among their ranks, all because of heart. She actually believed a tiny part of Thuringwethil had wished Lucani had died, to avoid all of the above and also to avoid the pain of her leaving. All the black wolf could see was a loyal packmate abandoning the pack. Lucani had been poisoned, and as a result had volunteered to remove her dead weight from the pack. Her reward was shame, disrespect and aggression.

Sadly, Lucani had expected nothing less from a youth so proud — in sacrificing her place here, Lucani had also sacrificed Thuringwethil's respect, and she had not been so naive as to not see this coming. That is correct, Thuringwethil, she replied calmly. This is what I do to repay you for your kindness. It was the very highest price she could pay. The very best thing she could do for her and for Sleeping Dragon.

But she had hoped to have more time to say goodbye... she needed to speak to Gyda of medical matters, advise her on the best plants to use for war wounds, and other such things. Leaving Sleeping Dragon without a healer had not been something she'd intended to do at all. But she had a long journey ahead of her, one that would be difficult already given her state — and Thuringwethil was on edge. She wouldn't put it past her to attack Lucani physically if she didn't immediately obey. She was sacrificing much for Sleeping Dragon, yes, but would she sacrifice her life in the merest hope she might be able to stay for a few more hours as a tutoring healer?

No. No, that was where her selflessness fell flat. It was only then that Lucani felt a little ashamed.

She gave a low, weak bow of silent respect to her Queens, and with her eyes still cast downwards she said one last thing. One final thing I feel I must inform you of is that I strongly believe I've been poisoned by a wolf among your ranks. I don't know who. That's the extent of my suspicions. With that, she finally turned away from the regal pair, and Lucani felt in her heart that all three were joined by a feeling of helplessness, despite all three believing that what they did was for the best. As she turned from Gyda, she caught her eye and hoped she could convey all the gratitude and expressions of her heart right there in her own gaze. And then — goodbye, Queens of the snow, she sad sadly, and walked with quiet pain towards the borders of Sleeping Dragon. Just as she'd once done from the other direction.