Mudminnow River fiend

here! have a novel :>

as stigmata expected - and perhaps serving as the thing he both hated and loved most about indra - she mightily rebuked and cut him immeasurably deep with only a look.

she seemed to swell before him, like a fire taken to kindling, and despite himself the warhound felt a need to go on the defensive with her...

he stood still instead; a wild-eye statue made to resemble the muted ferocity of some cavernous, long-dead god. and he took her serrated ire without a single flinch or waver. only when she had finished - with an ending that came abruptly by the soft and punctuating click of her teeth - did stigmata reanimate, lifting his chin to put emphasis behind what he said then.

"you are only half right, as usual," he scoffed, unable to restrict the lashing of his tail as a tendril of provocation clawed its way down his back. "my pride may be an issue, but the idea that i have refused to- to ingratiate myself with those wolves, simply because i do not want to be led, is absurd! and i will not apologize for believing in us more than you did."

the former dragoon narrowed his eyes and seemed to grit his fangs in a moment of restraint before slipping his grip and spiraling angrily into a tirade. "i will not stand underneath those wolves because this whole event has been a bad choice from conception, not because of some petty affectation you think i am beholden to. their leaders reek of mistakes and i was given no option but to heel to this choice without prior.. anything! i was told that i had no right to question any of this, when you, not long before, had assured me that i was needed - wanted even...

"it was the most delicious piece of baited lure i ever have had the displeasure of falling for, and i walked right madly into that wolftrap - eyes closed and throat exposed." a growl had bubbled up in his chest, taking on a life of its own until he was vibrating and the cracks in his stone facade began to distend, allowing his bitter basalt core to trickle out in bright threads.

"with that lie, you made me think it was safe to bind myself to you, and then you   forced me - unfairly, without discussion - into a position where i either must bow to strangers indefinitely, taking their consummate nicety for competence and strength while blindly forgoing my chances to court you, or - on the other paw - risk disrespecting the generosity they had so recklessly shown you by being myself, which they would have had every right to construe as threatening, because they do not know me and it too-fast approaches the season for me to compete." he took a breath, exasperated but wanting to douse her (unreasonably) in his virile perspective.

as well as a perspective not tainted by the typhlotic loyalty she felt towards laurel.

"those... kind wolves deserved better than to wonder  if i was coming for them or not - and i would have, do not have any doubts - but i wanted to avoid the misunderstanding that anything i did was personal, and newcomers do not have room to be misunderstood. so i did what i thought was right for your family," he continued, putting an unwitting emphasis on the wound delivered by the redleafs that had cut him deepest; "because i did not want my actions within the hollow to reflect badly on the rest of you, i chose what i thought was best to preserve my sanity, as well as honor your decision to show your belly and take shelter like a frightened pup.

"call it pride if you must, but your way seems just as absurd to me as mine might seem to you. and if having pride means that i must sometimes struggle - be cold or hungry - just to get the things that i want, then i accept the challenge, without question."

by now he had deflated somewhat, an icy hard glint returning to his countenance as he expelled all the things he had held tightly inside his chest - like a good soldier - but he seemed far from defeated. the opposite, in fact. he looked inflamed, even despite his carved, resolute posture. "i thought that until the season had passed, or i had amassed enough followers to lead us on our own again, that i would be able to linger nearby as your..." he didn't know what he wanted to say there, so he conceded the point. "but on top of everything else, you treated me like a derelict. too blinded by your sister's tarring of me to realize that i was trying to be respectful to them and still keep my promise to you."