Swiftcurrent Creek ishq risq

the pain would not slip away, the terrible pains of childbirth a tangible memory and the constant ache of her body numbing. she cared for her children, loved them, but not in that sharp, almost painful way that was custom for her. no, this was a softer love, and should she be stolen away from her she would not feel the flames of grief but the heavy weight of sin. and yet.

here and again, snatches of that same dream - dawn-touched fields before her, the taunt anticipation, the smell of sweat and earth and fear. the knowledge that she was inches from sweet victory. and other dreams, too, of deep wealds and sun-brushed canopies, simmering twilights and petrichor. flashes, snatches of memories turned dreams, but they brought her strength. 

she rose at the sound, which in itself was unusual for large part of her wished to remain lodged in her den. the movement felt stiff, as is she navigated a body not entirely hers, her lackluster pelt and sharp ribs seemed as if they belonged to another, too, but she did not notice them. she eased back down onto her stomach when she stood half in, half out of the entranceway, and fixed waning gaze on him. "I am fine." came the answer after a moment, and her gaze twisted back to where her children played.