Herbalists' Cache patience and restraint

She had more faith in him, and his ability to act, than he did- but the vote of confidence gave him just enough reason to hope that she might be right, and that he could pull it off. He might have had a better chance, had he not allowed his heart to soften at the sight of the children. He’d have to harden himself a little, if he hoped to watch them grow.

She looked as if he was praying for a moment. He’d never asked her if she had any beliefs, but he left her to her silence, dropping his gaze to watch the pups at her side. 

The sound of his name was warm, welcome, but his faint smile faded when doubt reached for his conviction. What did Sun Eater know of him, after all of it? Twice now he’d proven himself to be a coward by choosing not to fight- would that reputation keep him safe, or make him a target?

Her next words, meant to reassure him, instead reopened a wound she wouldn’t have ever seen, like a scar hidden beneath fur. He wouldn’t likely recognize the faces of his own children, now- had he turned his back on them, or had he done the right thing by sending them away? That question would haunt him forever. 

He felt as if he aged and grew weary from the weight of it all. Morwenna, and her shining gaze, was the only light at the end of this. Again, he would be giving up everything he’d had, with the chance to start over- but if anyone could convince him it was possible, it was her. 

I’ll be back. When the time comes, He said. When their plan could be fulfilled, they would be reunited again.