Overture Downs I got strippers in my life by they virgins to me

@Akuti; set directly after this thread

It was a lot brighter in the open space beside Easthollow's territory, where Grayday was hoping to find more of the wild turkeys that seemed to thrive everywhere but the land that they'd claimed. He'd been toying with this idea for a while, thinking that if they could just herd some of the turkeys toward Easthollow, they could keep them safe and tended and fat there to be used as back-up, should another famine strike the lands.

He had plans to leave in the springtime, but that didn't mean he wouldn't worry about the family he was parting ways with. He would come back, after all, and he wanted them all still alive and well when he returned.

"When I joined this pack, it was in the middle of a terrible famine," he said to Akuti, his voice pitched low despite the fact that they were completely alone. If he'd shouted, he doubted even the wolves back at Easthollow would hear. "We were called Silvertip, back then, and we lived on this mountain - and Steady told me that he'd feed me to the others, if I didn't pull my weight."

It hadn't been funny then and it wasn't funny now, but Day couldn't help but look back on those days in wonder. He'd been a different wolf, back then, and it was hard to think about how he'd gotten himself here.

They were trotting through the dead, muddy grasses, heading toward a small stand of trees a few hundred yards away. Grayday had been stiffling yawns since they passed the borders, but he still kept going, determined to do something useful before heading back home.

Akuti didn't mean to be rude in the ignoring of Grayday's comments, but she was too zoned out to really consider one of her snarky replies. Rather than saying anything, she followed behind him as she silently awaited his lead. Perhaps he knew of some special place where life thrived, but from Akuti could tell, it was only the two of them. What are we looking for? she asked, a curious look on her face. She didn't want to spend more time alone with him than she needed to, but this seemed more like it would be an extended tracking endeavor than an immediate meal.

Grayday glanced over when Akuti spoke, a small measure of surprise present in his features - as if he'd only just realized he was not alone. This was not the case, of course. How could he forget her presence? It seemed like he was always aware of her presence in the territory, and he had the sneaking suspicion that the night's debacle would only reinforce this strange phenomenon.

He was more surprised that he'd spoken at all, for the words had come from so deep in his mind that he was sure he'd meant to think them, not say them.

"Turkeys," he said after a moment of silence, having realized that he'd been asked a question. "I've been thinking - if we herded them into the territory, they could be our salvation. If the famine were to return." And if the turkeys didn't die with it. There were a lot of ifs in this plan, but he felt as though he needed to do something before he left.

And what better time than this? When he need to clear his mind, anyway. When the night was still young, and despite all that had happened, he could not yet find it in him to want to leave Akuti's presence.

It won't, she'd said, but Grayday couldn't help but feel there was still more to be said. By him, maybe, but maybe by her. Maybe by the night itself.

"They like sparse trees and small clearings," he went on, nodding toward the blurred outline of trees he could see just ahead.

Where Akuti came from, they rarely had a shortage of anything, despite their large numbers and collective family groups. The idea of having to prepare for a possible famine seemed strange in her mind but she did not speak on this thought as she knew that things were different (much different) in these Northern lands. Are you sure we can do this? With just the two of us? She looked up at Grayday, slightly worried and insecure about her abilities. It wasn't that she couldn't herd the birds — her small stature might actually serve as an advantage — but the thought of embarrassing herself in front of him again gave her a grave feeling of anxiety.

Grayday paused as the wind shifted, and he finally caught a whiff of the birds they were searching for. One ear leaned in that direction, listening for other signs of their quarry, while the other twisted toward Akuti to better hear her voice.

"Of course," he said, surprise and confusion coloring his tone. He looked toward her. "Why wouldn't we - "

For a moment his eyes seared across the slim, runner's cut of her body, and he remembered how small she'd felt trapped underneath him. Tiny, but sturdy, too. And warm. Alive, sweet-scented, doe-eyed -

"We can," he said firmly, gaze cutting quickly away from the dimunitive woman. "But tonight, I thought we could just find out how many are out here. See what we're working with. We can chase a few back tonight, but mostly, we need to find out how many wolves and how much time this whole project is going to take."

Akuti caught his gaze and looked down with a nod of her head, confirming that she'd heard his plan. This was a job for a tracker which was exactly what she preferred to do, and she was glad that this job was well within her reach. I can do that. She continued onward, allowing a strange silence to settle between them once again. Is it always going to be this wierd? she asked herself, though the thought was quickly pushed away when she picked up distant clucks and yelps. Akuti's eyes shifted to Grayday as she stopped and waited for him to direct her, as she was unsure of what he wished to do next. 

Did you hear that? she asked, her voice a bit lower than it had been. They sounded fairly far off, but one could never be too sure.

Day's ears swivelled uncertainly between the distant gobbles and the sound of Akuti's voice. He, too, could feel the weight of his blunder like a funeral shroud over the whole of the meadows. When he opened his mouth to try and dispell it, his heart jumped into his throat as though trying to save him from himself. You'll only make things worse, it warned, and Grayday had quite enough experience with running his mouth to know that this was true.

"Let's split up and check it out," he replied, after swallowing down the knot in his throat. "I won't be able to see you, so keep your eyes on me, and try to stay upwind. We're gonna count 'em for now and then meet back a couple hundred yards away. We'll decide together what to do after that."

He levelled her with one long look to make sure she'd understood, ready to answer any questions or clarify any points. It was a simple plan, but when hunting with new partners, it was important to understand each other.

All of what Grayday had proposed seemed simple enough, though there was one aspect of it which Akuti just couldn't seem to swallow.

He was going to leave her alone.

Whereas she wasn't necessarily looking forward to spending this entire night at his hip, the thought of him leaving her defenseless was much less comforting than one might have thought. She had no idea where she was or what else could have been lurking in the night, scouring the land for a tiny woman to snack on for the night. Akuti could defend herself, but when it came down to it, she was at a strong disadvantage.

A look of anxiety washed over her face as her tail stub started an uncomfortable whipping wag to keep the whine caught in her throat from escaping. This was one of the instances which she hated most, as she knew just how childish crying over this small ordeal would make her seem. Despite being a bit hurt by Grayday's previous words, Akuti was afraid to be left by herself and there was no one else around to protect her in the eery evening glow.

Okay, she said after taking a deep breath and averting her eyes to hide the glossy sheen. Keep your eyes on me, he had said, and perhaps being able to see him would provide a bit more comfort in their endeavors, but she was still fairly unsure. This shouldn't take long, right? There was an innocent tone to her words, as if she were a child about to sleep alone for the first night, without her father there to hold her when dusk came to life.

His ears went back at the sound of her voice - something about it was off, but he couldn't say exactly how. And then she went on, asking if it would take long, and Grayday realized that there were a million other things she could be doing, that he'd hurt her feelings that he was probably the last wolf she wanted to be spending extended amounts of time with.

With a tired groan, the beta flopped over on his side and then twisted onto his back, where he then wiggled appealingly at the smaller wolf.

"I didn't mean to growl earlier," he said, speaking the first words that came to mind. "And what I said - " he paused, shut his eyes against the pale haze of moonlight. He couldn't say he didn't mean it, but maybe, "Maybe there were better ways to have phrased it. I mean... I don't know what I'm looking for. I'm not - I'm not looking for anything, and that was..."

Not even his words were making sense anymore, and the greyscale male fell silent with a soft huff of frustration.

"I'm sorry," he said after a moment. "You don't deserve to be treated like that - just 'cause I don't have my shit together."

Akuti twisted her lips into a half smile, though her brow was still furrowed in frustration. He flopped onto his back, which she took as an invitation to approach, albeit with a bit of hesitation. She took a few steps forward before lying down on her stomach with her paws in front of her where she decided to place her head. I feel like you lied to me. Grayday hadn't explicitly said that he was interested in anything, but it was in the way that he acted which told Akuti all that she thought she needed to know. She sighed, wondering if she should continue to expose herself further than she already had.

And I know that we just met a month or two ago, she continued with a sigh, but I think I was starting to really like you. I even told Phiipa about you, dude. Plus, I know that you've noticed how I acted around you, so why didn't you warn me before I got all caught up in this mess? She was trying her hardest to keep eye contact with him, though it was hard with the wave of emotion quickly coming over her. Another whine became caught in her throat and she looked away, not sure if she was ready to hear his response.

Grayday thought back, excuses already jumping into his mind. I just thought you were weirdo or  Wolves flirt all the time without meltdowns like this! And it could've been true - all of it. But Grayday knew the truth.

"I did," he sighed. "I wanted you to like me, I - "

That whole motherhood thing really turns me on.

Did you know we fit together like we were made to?

Have you ever been this frustrated before?

"I was lonely," he said in a low voice, as if sharing some great secret. "I am. And I wanted to see..."

if I could love the right kind of wolf, a grown woman

if I could be happy with someone else

how it felt to just let go for once, to take a leap and see what happens

"I thought I could make it work," he went on, swallowing back all the truths he could've told. "But I don't think I'm ready for that. My wife - "

His throat closed once more, not in grief over Amber, but guilt over the lies that were spilling out of him. Clearing his throat, he tried to go on with more half-truths, still toeing the line.

"Well, she's gone. And I spend every night in a den full of kids I don't even know how to raise. I love them like crazy, but I'm going crazy. And then you were there, and you liked me, and maybe I... well, I took advantage of that."

Despite getting that off his chest, guilt still weighed heavily on the silvery beta. There were reasons sleeping in his den was difficult, and being surrounded by children wasn't the worst of them.

Akuti opened her mouth to speak but all that came out was that same suppressed cry wish she had been holding back. Embarassed and upset, she moved so that she was sitting back on her haunches rather than lying down. She took a deep breath and huffed in frustration, unsure of how to word her thoughts. In the moment, all she wanted to say was that he was an inconsiderate asshole who could only ever think of himself, but she knew that it was deeper than that. Or at least, she wanted to believe it was.

This is so unfair, you know that? Her voice was thick and heavy, carrying light whimpers behind it. It looked like she was devastated, she was sure. She looked like a broken woman with no direction and a lost love, when the true drive for her tears was the immense anger blossoming from her chest. None of what you are going through is my fault, and yet, I'm being punished for it? 

It wasn't her fault that he'd sired his children, or that their mother abandoned them, and yet she was being condemned? Another frustrated huff and a bit of scratching at the ground, and Akuti's thoughts began to intertwine her fury with her sorrow. I keep getting my hopes up and being let down, and I was hoping that you might be different. Obviously, I was wrong, so I'm sorry for thinking that anything could have come from this.

Every word hit him like a bullet, but Grayday couldn't find the energy to flinch. Part of him felt that every word was true while another screamed that they were they same, couldn't she see that? They were both trapped in this endless, crazy cycle. And he was so sick of feeling this way, so sick and tired off it. Earlier, he'd thought Akuti would provide escape, but so far, all she'd done was yell at him.

The beta rolled to his paws and lumbered a few steps away, turning his back on the dimunitive ball of anger before him. Maybe she was right and maybe they were both wrong - he was too tired to think it through tonight.

"Can you find your way home, Akuti?" he asked.

Now that the rant was over (or so Grayday thought), Akuti took a deep breath to compose herself and stood back on her own paws. Yeah, she said, her voice low and a bit raspy from the emotional encounter. She walked past him and began to track their scents, her den providing all of the motivationt that she needed to push her way back into Easthollow.

"Good," he said softly, though he could not say whether it was before or after she'd left his presence. He stood there a moment longer, wondering what to do. It seemed that their most recent spat warrented some kind of contemplation, or barring that, a good run to help keep such thoughts away from his sleep.

Instead, he lowered himself awkwardly to his belly, curling in on himself as though against his own will. Another huffy sigh passed his lips as he closed his eyes, but it brought the male no sense of relief.

It was late, he was tired, and he should've been in bed hours ago, curled around Adeline and his two beautiful children. He wondered if they were missing him, but then decided that they probably were. The nights were still chilly, and they all slept better with him there to fill the empty spaces in the den.

A long time later, though he could not quite say how long, he picked himself up and wandered back in the direction of home.