Ouroboros Spine Choices

@Angel Oak @Ponderosa 

It was nearing evening when Raindrop decided that she would talk to her daughters about the possibility of getting together with Valiant. She had found a cool shady spot by Lake Anik, and had set out a small sampling platter for dinner. There was fish, berries and rabbit.

She had called for them, telling them that dinner was ready.

Ponderosa had been tracking a scent when she heard her mother’s call. She was quick to respond, as she was very hungry. She was still a growing girl. 

She arrived with a smile on her face, her yellow eyes bright. “It looks delicious! Thank you mom!” She exclaimed, and then took a seat to wait for Angel to show up. 

Lately, she felt that something was different about her mother. She didn’t know what, or why, but perhaps this was why the two sister were called to dinner together.

Angel Oak, fresh from her humiliating encounter, slunk toward the call in something of a temper. She had, perhaps, a better idea than Ponderosa what they were being called together for, and in truth she had no desire to entertain it tonight.

She'd tried to encourage Valiant, subtly, toward courting her mother. The payout, however, was not something she'd quite prepared herself for.

Angel arrived and felt all the familiar wash of peace and happiness as she saw her mother and sister together. Some of her anger at the strange male faded away, and she heartily agreed with her sister.

"It sure does — but what's the occasion?"

She darted a quick glance in Rosa's direction. Was this what she thought? What would her sister think of it?

“There you two are!” She greeted them happily, her tail swaying as she reached to place a kiss on each of their foreheads. 

Now, as a mother, she could sense the tension that clung to her daughter. Upon Angel’s and ‘Rosa’s arrival, some nervousness surfaced. She tried her best to keep it hidden.

“Well, to tell you two the truth… there’s something I want to talk about.” 

She didn’t know how to continue, wanting to be careful with her words. But, she also had to be honest with her daughters. 

She took a deep breath, and blew it out: “How well do you two like Valiant? He’s been a friend of mine since before you girls were born.”

Ponderosa could easily sense the tension her sister carried upon arrival. The glance that Angel sent her way, along with their mother‘s words, made her feel uncertain.

When her mother had asked about valiant, she replied openly honest. “I remember him visiting us once or twice when we were little, but I don’t know much about him.” “And he hasn’t ever given me any reason not to trust him. I think he’s fine.”

“Why?”

Angel saw her chance to take a nibble of food, stealing from the plate if she had to. She needed something to chew on, was all, so that she could really think about her answer before she had to respond.

So Rosa went first. She thought Valiant was fine. Angel chewed slowly while she thought about what she would say, stretching out the silence too long, really.

"I think..." she began, hesitating. She thought about her father, suddenly. He might come home tomorrow. Worse, he might come home a month from now, when Raindrop had already... moved on... Or, worst of all, he might never come home, and they might wait for him all for naught.

"He's fine," Angel went on. "I mean — he's good. I like him. He taught me a lot. He's... Yeah. Good."

She stole a worried look at her mother. Could she truly be thinking about giving up? Could Angel truly support her? She suppose she had been all this time, even if it was hard to confront it now that it might be coming to pass.

"Why?" she asked, her voice very small.

This had made an anxiety flare in her chest, so much so that she twitched her tail. 

The girls spoke openly, yet she could see the hesitation that came from Angel. She knew that Valiant had spent a lot of time with her, and had taken her on a journey. 

Ponderosa didn’t know much at all, so perhaps she would be more easily accepting of the change. The many ways it could go wrong plagued her mind. What if they didn’t want this? What if they didn’t want to give up on their father? 

“Valiant and I have grown close, as friends. I enjoy his company.” She began, “Both of you know that your father left to find family, and Pine went with him. I think it’s safe to say that we all miss him.”

Grown close? As friends? Her mother’s anxious energy managed to find Rosa, who was naturally more introverted anyway. 

“You like him, don’t you mom?” She asked, her voice genuinely wondering, non judgemental.

“But, what if dad comes home? What if he finds you with another man?” 

She loved her father, even though he was only part of their lives for a short time, before he left. Why couldn’t Dad have stayed? Why go find family when he had one right here? But, she wanted her mom to be happy.

You like him, don't you mom?

It hurt to hear those words. Angel blinked, her eyes burning and her throat tight. Inside, she was screaming. Yes. Yes, mom, what if? What if he comes back? What if you're not there waiting for him?

But she'd been thinking about this for a long time, now. She knew all the answers. But she wanted Raindrop to answer anyway. She wanted her mother to have a better answer, because the pain of Sumac's absence was too deep to comprehend. Why wasn't he here? Nothing would ever make sense until he came home.

But he should have been back a long time ago.

"What if he gets home tomorrow? What if he never gets home? What if my legs turn into tree trunks?" she murmured, her voice rough. 

She felt bitter. Angry. Afraid. She wanted so desperately to be happy, and for her mother and sister to be happy, and she didn't know what path might lead there most faithfully.

"Dad's not here," she said, blinking a tear out of her eye. "We don't know if he ever will be. We don't even know why."

She could understand the anger and discomfort this brought up, and it was important that the girls had as much as a say in this as she did. She too, was unsure, she didn't know what the future held. She didn't know what had become of her husband and daughter. Maybe they were fine, maybe they weren't.

She answered 'Rosa first. "I do." she answered, a bit of guilt in her tone.

Then, she answered both of them: "You are both right. I understand. I'm just as confused as you are." Her words were true. "I don't know. I just.... don't know." There was a sad glimmer to her eyes. She then reached a paw out to stroke Angel's cheek. 

"I want you two to be as happy as possible. You are my children first and foremost, you're part me, and a part of your father. He loved you children dearly, and I wish I knew where he and Pine were now. But for now, it's just the three of us."

Everything was confusing. Each one of them made a good point. And, she trusted her mother, trusted that she knew what was right, what was true. She wouldn't do anything to hurt them in anyway. They've come this far, given everything that they've been through.

"I really miss dad. And Pine. But, what if they are happy out there? What if this was what they wanted? You, mom, should find happiness too. I trust you." 

She then look to her sister, watching closely, anticipating Angel's next words.

A little sob broke its way through Angel's walls. Another tear rolled down her cheek, and she buried her face quickly in Raindrop's chest. It was that past-tense, loved, that really got to her. Dad had loved them, but perhaps he didn't anymore. Angel Oak could only believe that he must be dead now, or otherwise permanently waylaid. But what else could have waylaid him for so long?

"I trust you," Angel agreed, glad that Rosa had landed on those words. "I trust you, mom, and I love you so much — I... I don't know, either. But you should be happy. We should all try to be happy."

She wiped at her face, trying to choke down another sob. Instead, she ended up holding out an arm to Ponderosa, trying to pull her sister into a three-way-hug.

She now had begun to cry, proud of her daughters, proud of the young women they have become. They deserved everything they wanted in life and then some. 

She embraced both of them, holding them tight. She managed to squeak out an "I love you."

And they stayed there, holding each other close. holding tightly onto them. "Thank you." "You girls are amazing. As long as you both are happy, then I am happy." "And, if your dad comes back, we will be honest, tell him the truth and figure it out. But until then, we will hope for the best. This down mean I don't love him, but.... I'm sharing my love."

After wiping away their tears, and getting the sobs under control, with a lighthearted chuckle she said "Now, let's eat. We don't want the food to sit for long. Eat up."

Tears were shed by all three of them, but when they embraced each other, it made most of the pan go away. Hopefully, Dad and Pine were alive and well. Maybe they had found his family, and were staying with them. Wherever he was, she would never stop loving him. She would just have to learn to love another. And it was okay if it took awhile. Love and trust aren't built up in a day.

"We love you too, Mom. Everything will be okay." She croaked, then wiping her nose with her paw. In many ways she was like her father, she worried, but, she was just as much like her mother; always looking at the positive.

Once she was done crying, the last thing Angel wanted to do was eat... but she did want her mother to be happy, and Angel had known all along that there would need to be a certain amount of keeping up appearances on her part in order to facilitate this. So she took another bite and forced it down and... yeah, actually? She was famished.

Meat and berries and the company of her two favorite women bolstered her spirits. She'd spent more time with just this as her family than she had with a father, really. Perhaps the rub was not just in Sumac being "replaced", but in her mother coming to belong not just to them, but to a strange man as well.

But Valiant wasn't... well, he was a strange man, but he wasn't a stranger.

Everything was going to be alright.