It had been such a long time since the fight between the Creek and Sunspire. Even at the time it had occurred, the boy had little understanding of why it had happened at all. Some dispute between Jace and Ferdie had led to an insane decision from their prior alpha, so they had left. That should have been the end of it, but that crazed woman had come to their borders to defile them, abandoning two of her own to save her own skin.
And then there had been Magpie, and for a few days, Summer had known what it was like to be free of what ailed him without the use of herbs or witchcraft or whatever it was he had been dabbling with that made him feel so unnaturally at ease. Just like that she had been gone, though. Returned to where she belonged, at the Creek where he was forbidden ever to go again. Perhaps his body was restricted from returning, but his mind went there often. He wondered about her, thought about her, wished he could somehow see her again. But the many moons that had passed since then told him it was not to be.
But why?
Summer sat idly upon the crest of the Oasis, gazing out at a spot only he could see in his mind. He wondered about Magpie. He wondered about that other girl he had met--so full of anger that just.... didn't fit somehow. Both were gone, and he couldn't find them. His own alpha was gone and he couldn't find him, though he had come so close. So many packmates too were gone now--Koda, Red, Fang... The boy shook his head as it grew fuzzier and fuzzier with all of the faces and emotions that began to swirl, wanting to clear it but creating a mash up of fog and color instead that he somehow could feel expanding through his head and swimming into his veins like a poisonous smog.
The boy gave a shudder. He needed a distraction. He needed another hit.
She moved quietly, head low and gait suited to curve a path across the mountainside. The destination was inevitably the Oasis or further up possibly, as she had grown jaded on the borderlands and tired of marking the mountain's foot. However there was little hurry pressing her up the slopes. She was preoccupied, somewhat tired, and carrying the weight of the matters; not finding Ferdie, and only vague reminders of something dire having happened, did not sit well.
Yet this did contrast something else, some bizarre satisfaction these last few weeks had given her. This shade of instinctual self-satisfaction inspired its own sort of strength, one that had never filled her lungs before which surpassed the thrill of a successful hunt or battle. She chalked it up to being thrust suddenly into this role, and having not yet been unable to meet its demands or run headlong towards issue -- aside from the missing piece that was the very reason she was allowed this opportunity in the first place.
So she slicked back her ears and found herself on a trail. Of wolf, of familiarity, and certainly of interest, her paws went that way until she loomed from cover into the expanse of the Oasis.
She could see Summer clearly now there upon the edge, and the silent question lurked in her expression: how was he? Amekaze guessed these recent events and changes had their impact on him in some unseen way, especially since he and Jace had been the ones to sniff out any cougar and Ferdie at all. But lately there just had been no time for one on one.. which was to be remedied right here and now.
![[Image: 5ifpFkc.png?1]](http://i.imgur.com/5ifpFkc.png?1)
i want to bleed in the 「r a i n」
Summer was debating on whether to look for somewhere to rest or just fall down right where he sat when his senses caught hold of his alpha's scent. For paused for a moment before turning, wondering at how quickly and easily his mind had turned to thinking that the alpha was approaching as opposed to Ame was approaching. He chuckled softly at the realization, then finally turned to give his alpha a tired smile.
"You're back," Summer said, his tail wagging softly. "I guess I'm not doing so great at Warden-ing if I didn't even realize that." Like many in the Spire, Summer knew that Ame had been out searching for Ferdie. No one had seen or found any sign of the man since he and Jace had tracked the cougar. Many were worried. Summer found he was in a place often that was beyond worry. It unfortunately was not beyond confusion, curiosity, and an inexplicable itch to keep moving that switched without warning to unbearable lethargy in a matter of seconds. Mood swings were another problem--as worry started creeping in.
Mhm,
she grunted softly, for indeed, she was back but was not particularly happy about it. Which was not to say she was sour about the Sunspire itself, for she still loved the mountain wholly. However the circumstances at play here were the unfavorable part. But with nothing to show for it. The trails.. they yield nothing,
she murmured with a frown that edged on a grimace at times. Were they supposed to keep going? Searching endlessly with so little to go on? Or, when did they simply... accept it? That Ferdie was gone, and for good. She dug in her heels at the thought. It still did not sit well and she took this as a sign to not stop. Not yet.
Perhaps not. I do move quietly, and like to go unnoticed when I can,
she smirked tiredly. She did pride herself on this to a certain extent, so it was not a discredit to the youth's growing skills from the way she saw it. Ame knew that Summer, like many of them, did what he could. How has it been here?
Peaceful, she hoped, as she assumed no news was good news on the home front.
i want to bleed in the 「r a i n」
Summer listened wordlessly as Ame told of her travels and how they had failed to bring her any closer to finding their wayward leader. A small frown twitched across his lips. He still cared very much for Ferdie, but he was swiftly moving beyond the hope that the man would return to them. In truth, he was beginning to consider his hope to be more a symptom of denial. No, Ferdie was gone, leaving behind the pups he had boldly claimed as his own (even though they weren't), and the woman he had brought to their Spire to become his mate (even though she wasn't).
"As do many predators who would mean us harm," Summer replied with a tired smirk of his own, "Maybe I should practice trailing you." He had little doubt that the cougar who had brought all of this stress upon the pack moved with just as much stealth. Perhaps tailing the alpha really would do the boy some good.
"Quiet," he said, allowing his gaze to drift up the mountain, "Very quiet... Sometimes I wonder if it's not too quiet--" Summer paused, turning his gaze to Amekaze apologetically as he realized he was doing it again; saying too much, stepping too far out of place. That was another problem with the poppies. While they took away the self-awareness that often caused the boy insufferable anxiety, they also tended to remove all inhibitions, including those that kept him conscious of what he was doing or saying how whether or not he should be doing or saying them.
She mustered a small wag of his tail and found herself appreciative of his outlook. Quite true,
she replied. I would not be opposed,
she then said, finding herself interested in bringing him a good challenge. Perhaps she ought to be even more careful of her tracks. Then again, such was not always possible when her day's duties were literally marking her claim to make it known to outsiders.. Probably why she was not a big fan of the task.
Nevertheless, she knew that Ferdie's absence stung him as it did herself. She had admittedly grown attached to him. Maybe just too much so, and her mind wandered casually to the possibilities of the great many what ifs that followed. It did not help that Ferdie had left them in the middle of something somewhat bizarre, with a decent handful of matters all of his own creation left open-ended.. which reminded her that she had yet to even meet this.. Hawkeye. Amekaze only knew about her through Jace; she'd had enough to do otherwise and rarely thought about it, honestly.
It is a very ominous silence. I first thought it may only be winter's approach,
she shifted her weight; it was on-going that she was inexplicably uneasy about its arrival. Her eyes followed his towards the mountainside. The days shortened quickly and the winds grew crisp. But there is more. I.. feel it too,
she squinted, having once written it off as odd paranoia. She had not known before that Summer was aware of such unspoken, utterly intangible notions. He seemed different from the last time she had been with him, and probably not just because he could breath. A part of me still wants to search more yet.. if it is only a waste, efforts are better spent here in the event something ever does happen, winter or otherwise..
she growled softly and dissolved the note to a huff. It was because moving on without Ferdie was not easy.
i want to bleed in the 「r a i n」
It was then for the first time that Summer began to wonder if there had been something between his former alpha and the current. When he had voiced his concerns to Jace, the male had been all for giving up the search and focusing their efforts on finding the cougar. But Ame seemed still determined. Perhaps she was not as bitterly angry towards what Ferdie had done as the beta, or maybe she like Summer once had never thought of what consequences may follow if they did find Ferdie. Or, maybe when Ferdie had disappeared, a little piece of the female's heart had gone too. Summer thought then of Magpie and the other girl and knew he could not fault Ame for not wanting to give up if that was indeed the case.
"I hate to say it," Summer started slowly, "But I think the pack needs you here now more than Ferdie needs you to continue searching for him." The words tasted foul upon his tongue, but he let them go even so. "If Ferdie has survived this long on his own, then he won't need us to help him find his way back. The pack, though, cannot band together and become strong enough to survive the winter without an alpha to make us whole..."
Summer glanced at Amekaze's face as he spoke, wondering at how she would feel about his words. This was the first pack he'd been a part of since he was only a month old, but he knew that this was not how it was supposed to be from his father. A pack was close, spending most of their time together--not bits and pieces hiding in the far reaches of their lands and even others not within their boundaries at all. They'd spent too much time apart looking for Ferdie. Perhaps instead of searching so hard for the one who'd made the mess, it was time to clean it up.
I know,
she replied with a slow exhale at the ugly truth. It is why I am here, after all.
Instead of still out, wasting away the hours and the miles looking for something well beyond reach. It was the mountain and its wolves that made her keep a limit to it, but there was no denying the itch to keep looking that she could not yet shake. Time was making it easier to justify her inaction, for as Summer said, if he still persisted out there, he may be fine.. and the trails only grew colder on their end; obviously, he was not here.
And as she had said, this is why she was here -- to keep something together in his absence and from here, guide them towards strength, survival and camaraderie. While not prepared for the role, she had seized it anyway and now a whole pack looked to her as their center. Her ears flicked; this notion seemed so weighty, and made her shift her own posture subtly. I have known Ferdie for so long, to suddenly not have him around has been.. strange to adjust to,
she huffed. This was a change even she was struggling with for reasons not quite understood.
He had been so steadfast all that time and she had always known where to find him, even when she had been a loner. But it is what it is. I just cannot yet deny the want to search still, although the Sunspire's priority outweighs it majorly. Especially now when there is nothing to go on.
Brows furrowed, she decided to shift the topic. I now wonder if perhaps the cougar he evidently met up with may lurk closer to the mountain soon. Several weeks back there was one -- an eerie albino one no less -- hunting at our base that needed running off.
i want to bleed in the 「r a i n」
Summer eyed his alpha as she responded to his words. The frustration and displeasure was there in her tone and in her eyes and the sympathy it brought out in him only strengthened when she went on to discuss how strange it was for her to not have Ferdie around anymore. His suspicions of some sort of romance between the two also intensified, but truly it was neither here nor there at that point.
"Maybe we should be looking for the cougar instead," he said thoughtfully, not actually intending to do so out loud but it sort of happened anyway. "I haven't uncovered anything that suggests that it or any of its kind have been around lately, not since... you know." It wasn't of much help, he knew. But no news was good news. And yet, he couldn't help but want to do more. Protecting their borders was one thing, but it felt somehow wasted when there was consistently nothing there to protect against.
She had always tried not to think too in depth about her relationship with Ferdie, whatever it was. She knew she brought out something.. else in him, and she always felt at ease in his company. That and she had known him longer than any wolf around here. Many of the other faces she had met and formed any connection to many moons ago had either died or moved on. For so long, he had been an exception.
Anyway, she mulled over the idea of pursuing cougars instead. Perhaps it is worth considering.
There were goods and bads both that came to mind with this approach. Her expression was stern with concentration. But should we find it, are we ready to confront it without major consequence..
she murmured thoughtfully. They could kill wolves easily and her and Jace were the formally titled warriors here (and he had that limp still).
But there were a decent handful that came to mind that she thought could hold their own. But with winter so close, wounded pack mates was not inviting in the least. And she knew the pack probably wouldn't fancy her running headlong at it alone, either. If only we could know somehow and with certainty which one did it.. As much as I would not complain if all the cougars in the area were gone, though, since I suspect they may come here in winter to hunt our goats. The albino one was, and it was not even winter then.
She was thinking the goats would stay nearby even in winter. Maybe move more into the forests or down the mountain, which could just make them easier for other predators (wolves and cougars alike) to pursue if they traveled too far from the Sunspire itself.
i want to bleed in the 「r a i n」
Summer felt the stirring of self-importance swell slightly in his chest when Ame suggested her agreement with him on how to handle themselves from there. It was such a strange feeling, and he really rather wished it would go away. It made him uneasy, although if he'd had his head on tighter he would have been more capable to realize that it was merely instinct pushing him to assert himself and let free to dominant characteristics he had no idea were a part of his personality. For now, the feelings were just an uncomfortable clench in his stomach that too caused his head to throb as he tried to figure out what was wrong with him.
"If only we could find the trail again," Summer replied slowly, "Or if I could have gotten the scent of the albino. I'll never forget its stench as long as I live, nor will Jace I'll bet. We'd know the cat if we came across it." He shut his eyes in an elongated blink, suddenly finding himself feeling a little dizzy. He did not sway or show any outwards signs of this other than the brief closing of his eyes, however.
If only..
she agreed with a slow sighing exhale. It would be so much easier if they just had a trail to go on, a real one that was able to be tracked to some kind of result. Yet, they remained with nothing. I have tried finding trace of the ghost cat, but turned up nothing. It was.. not too long after our founding that it was here last, so there is a good chance it lurks here no longer, but there is no knowing for certain.
As she understood it, they could maintain large ranges and truthfully, hoped it had gone away. Far away.
No matter what happens or does not, Ferdie's poor choice in confronting.. whichever cat it was, was so ridiculous it makes my head hurt.
Speak of which, she shook her head. She was leery of him and Jace's potential reunion, knowing that his leave had wounded the dark-furred Beta likely more than he let on. And she knew good and well that those two could go at it with reckless violence if it came to that point. She didn't want to see it happen, though, and pushed the notion aside promptly.
i want to bleed in the 「r a i n」
He blinked at her as her commentary came to a close, unsure of what to say and somehow losing grip on what she had said at all. He shook his head lightly to brush off the thoughts that were scratching at his tongue, wanting to be said. He had had enough of them for now, and he suspected that Ame likely did as well. "You know what..." he said slowly, bringing himself onto all fours, "Why don't we hunt for something we're sure to find? I saw a flock of geese resting at the river by Sunshadow Rock just this morning. I'm sure that they'll still be there..." He eyed her hopefully, eager to escape this gloomy topic and to try and outrun the looming aftermath of his high.
She chuffed softly, humored some. That sounds good,
she replied, and quickly latched onto the notion of a hunt with a decent chance of a reward at the end of it. There were other times to consider the cougar, and with nothing to go on, there was no point at this time anyway.
Amekaze sprung into motion and swept her head for him to lead the way, although she would be right on his heels towards the geese. Anticipation welled as she already began to think about the thrill of the hunt, and when the time was right, her gait kicked up to a lope towards the destination.
i want to bleed in the 「r a i n」