Larksong Grotto Send in the Clowns

"i want to go!" he exploded, jerking away from his cousin so they would not feel it would come to anything physical. "i've wanted to go for months, masque. you don't know what the fuck it is like, to lose your dad, then your mom, then your brother, then — literally anyone else who knows you, for who you are. not what you do."
"i don't want to mediate anything. i'm done, masque. i really am. lilia has been — someone constant. and your mom won't even give her a chance. that's why i'm still here. don't forget we were here when she wasn't."
wounded, knowing he had said things he couldn't take back, ancelin didn't leave. he waited, wilting, wanting to drum his head against the dirt and stay there until this was over. "we were leaving, dude." he couldn't get over how sideways his world had tilted since then. "and you should too." his eyes blazed suddenly. "you're here. no one else is, masque."