Twisted Slough sempre

Mature Content Warning

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The participants have indicated the following reason(s) for this warning: tw for suicide, tried to think of how his character might move forward but icly I couldn’t come up with something other than this
Also this song for some reason just hits ;.;

When he found the plants and recognized them, Ashlar knew he’d found his solution.  The other conclusions hadn’t been right, but this… this was the ending for a coward.  A failed medic who had never brought life, only watched helplessly as others died.  Even helped, when that woman had come seeking death for the pups inside her, but she’d only had pain afterwards.  He’d never once truly helped.

This was right.  The poison wasn’t strong, but he had enough that there wouldn’t be any doubt.  Then there was no turning back.

It was neither quick nor painless.  It took agonizing hours for it to run its course before he finally suffocated, twisted, rigid with pain and entirely unaware of the world around him.  Then he was gone.

There were no songs.  If there’d been a future where he could have seen happiness again, he’d been too wrapped in darkness to see it.  Too compounded with failure, with lost hope, with the fleeting and broken promise of more.  In the end he didn’t have the strength or desire to overcome it.

As he died, a single tune played across Ashlar’s memory, one that only he could hear.  His mother’s voice was beautiful as it beckoned him into the welcoming darkness.  There was peace there from the pain and suffering, and her face was the last thing he saw as reality slipped away.  He deserved to die alone, but her presence was a mercy he needed in that moment.  Then there was nothing.