Redtail Rise [m] bolero

Ashlar had loved so many things in his lifetime - his parents, Avicus, Chacal, and Ratio were only the foremost. None of them were typical love but they were all key aspects of his happiness. He never imagined ever having to choose. He knew he couldn't promise not to see her.

She's different, he repeated, some of the hope dying from his expression as he took in what Ratio was saying. How could he think he was less? Or that it meant something different, or something smaller, just because Chacal existed as well?

Ashlar felt as though he'd been asked whether he preferred air or water. There was no answer.

She doesn't take away from you. Time with her wouldn't mean I wouldn't want this. He looked down and took a moment to steady his voice. He didn't like this, but he wouldn't hold it against Ratio regardless of his answer. They could go back to the way it was and Ashlar could pretend for the sake of their friendship. Just as he'd done with Avicus weeks ago. If it isn't enough, that's okay.

Ashlar didn't see a world where he could simply choose to set one love above the others. Perhaps this was just how it worked - that others would make the decisions for him. The idea of that only made his stomach sink.