Ankyra Sound a gunslinger knows pride - that invisible bone that keeps the neck stiff
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Ooc — Fira
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#12
Inspired by “Nightcall” by London Grammar

As Illidan continued speaking, Grezig came to the realization that this was, perhaps, one of the longest actual conversations they had ever had. This made her happy to some small degree, yet the subject matter of the conversation made her feel a deep sorrow, the feeling of staring down into an abyss on a dark night and being unable to see the bottom. His soul seemed so… hard to reach. Grezig had grown emotionally so much since coming to the Wilds and she wondered now if she had been this emotionally unavailable when she’d first arrived… How sad…

I’m giving you a night call to tell you how I feel…

“I’m glad I can talk about my children with you,” she admitted quietly. She took a breath. “You know I think of you as my son.” She let those words sink in for a few moments before continuing, “Some months ago, I think when I told you I was leaving the Plateau, I lashed out. I told you I was not your mother. Well. I’m not. I won’t take that title away from Caiaphas. But… But I am, all the same. At least, I think of myself as your mother. One of them, anyway. I did not birth you, but I helped raise you, alongside Kavik and Liri.”

I’m gonna drive you through the night, down the hills…

“There’s something I’ve always wanted to tell you, Illidan. But I’ve always been afraid it would push you away.” She looked up at him, into those yellow eyes that often avoided her gaze, or looked back at her with defiance instead of softness. She took another breath.

I’m gonna tell you something you don’t want to hear…

“I love you, Illidan,” she said, forcing her voice to remain even. Kavik had been the only other wolf she had ever said that to in her entire life. As pups, her parents had never said such sentimental things. She supposed it had been known instinctively that her parents had cared for her and her siblings, but no one had ever said it, and she made the choice then to always tell her children that she loved them. “I love you,” she repeated. “You are my son as much as you are Caiaphas’, and I love you as any mother loves her child. And I think, one day, you will find your happiness.” That was her hope for the boy who was now a young man. She just wanted him to be happy, to feel love and to feel loved. That was all.
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RE: a gunslinger knows pride - that invisible bone that keeps the neck stiff - by RIP Grezig - April 24, 2019, 10:23 PM