It was early in the morning when Ali slipped away from the others, assuming they were still asleep.
He needed some time to think, somewhere away from them; not too far, but far enough that he couldn't see their faces. Far enough that he couldn't see the torn nub where Korei's ear once was or the exposed, ruined muscle of Lennon's leg, far enough that he couldn't see the anger flashing in the latter's eyes every time he looked at him.
The boy acted like he didn't notice, for fear of what the results of the inevitable confrontation would be. For once in his life, he didn't want to leave.
By the time he reached the creek, fear had transformed to anger. Anger at himself, at the strange wolf that had tormented Korei-- mostly himself. He huffed and kicked a rock hard into the water, ignoring the stinging pain it sent through his paw. Then he wondered what he would do, if Lennon told him to leave forever. The boy stared down at the water, shivering now, though he could not determine if it was from cold or the sudden return of that crushing fear from earlier.
He would go as far away as he could, he decided. Somewhere he wouldn't be able to mess things up again; somewhere away from others. The thought ached, but he knew it was the only logical course of action. He had spent so long trying to belong somewhere, or maybe to someone-- and all he had succeeded in doing was hurting others. Upsetting others. Spreading destruction and death where he went, despite his best intentions.
Maybe the boy was cursed; or maybe it was something more sinister than that.
Ali began to sob, unable to stop himself from directing his question at the water below him.
And then he was babbling, confessing to no one; no one but the wind and the water.
He curled up by the water's edge, exhausted from the outburst, and fell into an uneasy half-sleep.
He needed some time to think, somewhere away from them; not too far, but far enough that he couldn't see their faces. Far enough that he couldn't see the torn nub where Korei's ear once was or the exposed, ruined muscle of Lennon's leg, far enough that he couldn't see the anger flashing in the latter's eyes every time he looked at him.
The boy acted like he didn't notice, for fear of what the results of the inevitable confrontation would be. For once in his life, he didn't want to leave.
By the time he reached the creek, fear had transformed to anger. Anger at himself, at the strange wolf that had tormented Korei-- mostly himself. He huffed and kicked a rock hard into the water, ignoring the stinging pain it sent through his paw. Then he wondered what he would do, if Lennon told him to leave forever. The boy stared down at the water, shivering now, though he could not determine if it was from cold or the sudden return of that crushing fear from earlier.
He would go as far away as he could, he decided. Somewhere he wouldn't be able to mess things up again; somewhere away from others. The thought ached, but he knew it was the only logical course of action. He had spent so long trying to belong somewhere, or maybe to someone-- and all he had succeeded in doing was hurting others. Upsetting others. Spreading destruction and death where he went, despite his best intentions.
Maybe the boy was cursed; or maybe it was something more sinister than that.
Ali began to sob, unable to stop himself from directing his question at the water below him.
Am I a bad person?
And then he was babbling, confessing to no one; no one but the wind and the water.
I try so hard to be good. I try, I try.The rest of it was incoherent, devolving into whimpers and sniffles when he was done crying.
He curled up by the water's edge, exhausted from the outburst, and fell into an uneasy half-sleep.
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Messages In This Thread
i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Alarian - January 18, 2018, 01:39 PM
RE: i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Lennon - January 19, 2018, 06:22 PM
RE: i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Alarian - January 19, 2018, 06:37 PM
RE: i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Lennon - January 19, 2018, 09:48 PM
RE: i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Alarian - January 19, 2018, 10:46 PM
RE: i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Lennon - January 21, 2018, 03:50 PM
RE: i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Alarian - January 21, 2018, 04:27 PM
RE: i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Lennon - January 21, 2018, 04:44 PM
RE: i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Alarian - January 21, 2018, 05:13 PM
RE: i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Lennon - January 21, 2018, 05:29 PM
RE: i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Alarian - January 21, 2018, 07:31 PM
RE: i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Lennon - January 21, 2018, 07:48 PM
RE: i always make such expensive mistakes;; - by Alarian - January 21, 2018, 08:31 PM