Broken Boulder so it seems i'm someone i've never met

The sound of his sister's approach startled him; for half a beat he tensed further, prepared to whip around with a snarl and blazing eyes. Unbidden, his mind conjured this image— he was shamed immediately. The boy deflated, guilt and fear replacing anger before he had time to draw another breath. What am I becoming?, he wanted to ask, but the words were stuck in his throat.
Alarian turned pleading golden eyes to his littermate, glistening with tears and starlight. Lanawyn— why... why am I like this?
He knew even as the words escaped him, barely a whisper, that she had no better answer than he did— none but what their mother had pressed upon them so young. The clinical explanation of his roots— of his potential to lose himself— had been carved into the foundation of his person; written like words in fresh concrete. He knew his mother had put them there to always remind him— this was his forever.
Perhaps it had been necessary— or simply cruel. In this moment, he deemed it both.