Broken Boulder you have just decapitated shia labeouf

uhhhh i'm sorry about ali
apologizes for him 50 times

Maybe they just weren't meant to be friends. The sharp edge to Lily's words brought him back some; he almost flinched from her touch, struggling to calm himself. Of course he knew this wasn't ideal— as if he wanted it any more than she did!
Alarian had once thought to himself that the quickest way to earn his affection was to allow him to be an idiot without making him feel like one. He was learning the quickest way to lose it was to do the opposite. And that was all he could feel, now— like an idiot. He wanted to disappear.
Finally, he snapped: You could talk to me— without the judgment, for once, and maybe I'd be able to handle it. Maybe I'd want to tell you things. The words were half-snarled, but somehow raw; defensive, reactive, a clumsy blow not really meant to hurt, but to announce his own hurt, a grievance that had begun as far back as Lennon's disappearance. He was trying, in the best way he knew how— trying to find a way to correct his own mistakes, soothe the hurt he had caused. But maybe he would never understand how to do that, and maybe Lily would never even understand that she had hurt him at all. Maybe that was just how things were.