Falls of the Hinterlands and if you don't love me now, you will never love me again

Blackbear accepted the nudge with a gutsy sigh that turned into a startled squeak at Tegan's language. "She wasn't - " a bitch. "Don't say that. I'm just a mess, is all." She didn't blame the woman for being exacting, and she certainly didn't blame her for the way Blackbear had run off.

Honestly, she didn't know where Tegan was getting his estimation of her. She wasn't a good wolf, and she was ashamed to have claimed to be one. Being unable to back up her claim had led her to the realization that she wasn't one, and then almost using her father's death to gain sympathy had really been the icing on the cake.

"She's right, Tegan. I should have been there when he died. Maybe if I'd been around..." But she couldn't go down that road. Hating herself for not being there was one thing, but blaming herself for Daddy's death would definitely have made him mad at her. She felt he would at least understand where she was coming from about the first thing.