Arrow Lake Hold it, even though it kills you slowly

His closeness confused her just as much as it soothed her hurt, but she would remain close for as long as he would allow. The silence was tense, heavy with all the things she didn't want to ask and all the things he couldn't say. But finally he spoke, and she was surprised at his admission. She knew he didn't usually reveal his fears to just anyone. 

It was a complicated situation to say the least. Any hope she may have felt at the implication behind his words was quickly doused by the mention of Stigmata. He was right: they had no way of knowing how the general would react if they became something more. I have the same fear, she answered, leaning back some to meet his gaze. It had been one of the reasons she had initially kept her feelings from Mahler. The bond between the three of them was important to her, and she wouldn't want anything to jeopardize that. But it wasn't exactly like she could just force her feelings away, even if she hadn't admitted them to the Kapitän I wish I could say things wouldn't change with Stigmata, but I honestly don't know. And it went without saying that she, too, feared change. But wasn't this the kind of change you were supposed to take risks for? 

I don't know what we do now. Her words were hesitant and she couldn't hide the vulnerability she felt now that he knew her most closely kept secret. She shouldn't have said anything; it wasn't fair, but there was nothing she could do about it now.