The Heartwood i've loved everything about you that hurt

He wonders about Lily, then; whether she's dead, too, or if she'd had a part in Mal's complaints — but the thought stings, and he locks it away as thoroughly as his hopes for Delight. They have been dead to him for a long time, he tells himself. What matters is the present.
Still, he cannot help having his regrets. I guess I shouldn't have left the pack to them, then, He says a little wistfully, remembering when he'd been a leader. A leader, but shackled to his pack more than anything. He does not miss it... but he misses Bracken Sanctuary, or at least some parts of it. He misses Eris and Zamael and Korei Julia, such important figures reduced to phantoms in his dreams. He hardly even remembers their faces now — but he remembers Lily's perfectly, and Delight's too. Suddenly eager for a change of subject, he adds, You mentioned your own pack — are you the leader?