Neverwinter Forest But this is the song I wrote you in the dark

@Mal
set for early morning 4/25

She had been gone all night, wandering in an unknown direction until she literally had no energy left. Then she had fallen asleep near a stream she didn't know in a place she didn't know. It was not a safe thing for her to do and she would not have normally been so reckless, but grief messed everything up inside her head. All she kept thinking was that she couldn't go through this again. It was too fucking hard. She couldn't keep anyone from dying, obviously, but she could protect herself going forward. She had let her guard down, and now she was paying the price. The universe had swooped in and stolen her happiness in a matter of minutes. 

The sun had woken her in the morning, and eventually she pulled herself up and made her way back home. Part of her wanted to run and start over again. But she kept thinking about Mal and how sad he must be too. Matty was his brother, even if they hadn't known each other very long, and her leaving would only cause him more pain. She wanted very much to to run and never come back to deal with everything, but her loyalty made her return. She couldn't betray Mal like that. 

She shuffled over the borders, feeling completely exhausted despite the fact that she had just woken up. No amount of sleep would make her feel any better, she knew that. She paused once she was back in the forest a short distance from the edge of the territory. What the hell did she do now?