Broken Antler Fen I could fight forever, but life's too short

new one for @Eljay whenever you want <3

It was night, the deep part of the night where pretty much everyone else was asleep and the quiet felt overwhelming. As was the case more and more, though, Maia was having trouble sleeping. She still couldn't believe about Ibis, but she knew immediately what that had meant. It was so easy to throw herself without any hesitation into being a mom to now five pups, but at night, when they slept, her mind just wouldn't shut up.

You aren't their mom. You have no right to be. You should've been there for her and done more, and now she's dead just like Wraen. There's always so many more important things to do, right? Useless. Pathetic. They are going to hate you. They already do.

After a while she couldn't take it. As quietly as she could, Maia extricated herself from the sleeping puppies and slipped out of the den, then moved to sit down a small distance away.

Everything felt so overwhelming these days and she wasn't sure how they were going to get through this. They kept asking where she was and Maia kept lying, but she knew that she couldn't lie much longer. They needed to know that their mom wasn't coming home. Telling them was going to break her heart, and she wasn't sure she had a whole lot of unbroken pieces left in there.

Silently, she felt tears start to roll inexplicably down her cheeks. Her chest tightened with frustration and the weight of everything, but she wouldn't wake up the kids. Instead she just looked up and stared at the stars through eyes blurred with tears.