Redhawk Caldera There's just us. People. Doing our best to get by.

At first it seemed as though Reyes was going to give the answer that he thought Eljay might want to hear. Something starting with 'I'm', which usually would result in '.. fine', '.. alright', or something similar. Then he paused, though, and Eljay trimmed his gaze ahead, allowing Reyes to take his time to process his thoughts. There was no rush.

When Reyes said 'I don't know', Eljay glanced at him briefly, but pushed his gaze back to their surroundings when he saw that Reyes was avoiding eye contact. He mirrored a lot of Eljay's initial thoughts and feelings about being back at the Caldera, there. Eljay admitted, I get that. It's weird for me, too. For another moment he was silent, but then, after what seemed to be a moment of hesitation, the Auspex elaborated. I don't know if I ever told you, or if anyone else told you what happened, but I didn't leave the Caldera in a very good place. I just felt pressured all the time, and everything going on... It was just too much. When I left eventually, I didn't even tell anyone about it. He sighed as he thought back to collapsing into Maia's arms and being asked to be brought to Brecheliant to live with her instead. He wasn't proud of it, wished he'd owned up to leaving, but he also knew that it had been one of the best decisions in his life. And he knew Towhee might've convinced (or guilt tripped) him into staying if he had decided to tell them. He had not been strong enough, then.

Eljay looked out into the Caldera's landscape as he added: I didn't realise how bad it had been for me, how mismatched Towhee and I were really, until I found a new family at Brecheliant. I guess I never really realised when I lived in her pack that no matter how hard I'd try, well... Nothing I could do would ever really, truly impress Towhee. Maybe it was unfair towards Towhee to think of it this way, but Eljay'd always felt like he wasn't good enough for her. When she had trained him after the battle at Blackfeather Woods — trying to get him to be something he was decidedly not. Towhee had come to appreciate him as a healer over time, he knew that, but he felt that even that appreciation had swiftly turned into being taken for granted, and being expected to excel again, more, in other areas. He'd never felt good enough, for her.

Maybe his personal story wouldn't be of much use to Reyes, but Eljay hoped it could be used to forge a better bond between himself and Reyes, and maybe help him open up a bit about his own experiences, too.