Broken Antler Fen PeachPuff
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a hundred mini dreams and a healing scar ♥
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#14
Even though theoretically Eljay knew that, it was hard to determine what was fair towards others. He ideally just wanted to put everyone first, but it seemed like that was a very hard thing to achieve. Perhaps unrealistic and impossible, he realised in that moment, as it hadn't really occurred to him before that that was what he was trying all along.

He definitely didn't want to put others before Maia, or before their future children. Just as how he had always put Weejay and Elfie before everyone and everything else, even though he hadn't been in the best place when they were growing up. Somehow having a family made the focus more singular and clear (even though it was still mostly a diversion from having to put himself first, by putting those closest to him first instead).

Wraen shared some wisdom then, and the words did hit a chord with Eljay. If you are a happy and content yourself, it's very easy to share with others and feel no loss of that. Eljay hadn't been in a very good place a lot of moments in his life. He was in a pretty alright place right now, actually, which was why the meltdown impacted him so much more, because it made it even more unexpected (for him, anyway; those around him might've seen it coming). He wanted to make others around him happier, but it was hard to think about making himself happy before that because somehow it felt selfish.

Left with little time to process those words Wraen suggested they find a place for the Blackthorn spirits. For mom and dad... And Elfie, he thought grimly to himself. Yeah, he agreed with a nod.

Even though Eljay didn't think that his mother was really a ghost (after all, like Wraen said, she would've totally haunted them, if not just for shits and giggles rather than impatience) the words of having to hurry still somehow made him feel rushed. He tried to shrug off those feelings and grinned. Oh, yeah, you don't want to make her impatient. I mean — I do think that if she was haunting us, she would've pranked us by now. Or at the very least, the wolves around Eljay; he wasn't too sure she would pester him, but she would certainly let him know she was there some way, and her way wasn't sending sweet symbols or drawing hearts in the clouds in the sky, but probably, yeah, pranking those around him when she was mentioned at least. Just so that he'd know she was still there for him. But better safe than sorry. Got any places in mind..? He tried to think of what his mother liked. Elevation, he felt, would suit her well, but then again, she'd been an explorer at heart and it seemed that she mostly liked a place with varied landscaping.
Messages In This Thread
PeachPuff - by Wraen - March 14, 2021, 02:37 PM
RE: PeachPuff - by Eljay - March 16, 2021, 05:05 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Wraen - March 17, 2021, 04:43 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Eljay - March 17, 2021, 07:07 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Wraen - March 20, 2021, 04:34 PM
RE: PeachPuff - by Eljay - March 23, 2021, 04:43 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Wraen - March 23, 2021, 01:07 PM
RE: PeachPuff - by Eljay - March 24, 2021, 04:39 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Wraen - March 28, 2021, 09:34 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Eljay - April 01, 2021, 08:56 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Wraen - April 02, 2021, 02:27 PM
RE: PeachPuff - by Eljay - April 07, 2021, 08:47 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Wraen - April 07, 2021, 12:32 PM
RE: PeachPuff - by Eljay - April 09, 2021, 01:56 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Wraen - April 10, 2021, 04:40 PM
RE: PeachPuff - by Eljay - April 16, 2021, 07:51 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Wraen - April 23, 2021, 03:16 PM
RE: PeachPuff - by Eljay - April 28, 2021, 02:09 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Wraen - April 28, 2021, 03:33 PM
RE: PeachPuff - by Eljay - April 29, 2021, 02:04 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Wraen - May 02, 2021, 04:00 PM
RE: PeachPuff - by Eljay - May 04, 2021, 05:42 AM
RE: PeachPuff - by Wraen - May 11, 2021, 03:02 PM