Sunbeam Lair and he, of his high comrade sorrow dreaming

forward-dated a little bit

There is an aching familiarity to this place, and it keeps him longer than he'd intended on staying. He doesn't even know what has drawn him so far from home; it simply feels right to wander, like he was made for it. So he's here — far from the only place he can draw up in his memories, yet somehow feeling crushed by the weight of the familiarity of the cavern he stands in now. He takes in a slow breath, trailing along the jagged wall with the tip of his tail brushing its rocky surface. It's a magnificent sight, lit up by fragments of golden sunlight spilling in through the broken ceiling — and it fills him with a deep, aching sadness for reasons he can't put a name to. He moves toward the center of the vast space, settling back on his haunches with his tail curled around his paws. His ears fold back slightly as he glances around, shivering and wondering if his memories will return to him. Maybe if he stays here a little longer...

He had wandered far from the forest his leaders had claimed, but he had to get away. The trees and the other wolves made him feel suffocated and further fed the ever-burning anger inside him. So, he had left the artificial borders and headed south through the flatlands, moving into the mountains when the scent of the blackfeather wolves grew too strong. He honestly had no issues with a violent run in but thought it might complicate things and so avoided that area. The mountains were quiet and combined with the snow and freezing temperatures, made him feel utterly alone. He preferred solitude most of the time, but if he remained that way for too long, tendrils of intrusive thoughts began to creep inside his mind, poisoning his thinking even more than it already was; these were the times he sought out violence for violence-sake. Usually, he needed a reason, even a delusional one, but when his mind turned against him, he had yet to find any other cure. 

That was why now, as he neared the opening of the cavern and scented a stranger he didn't turn and walk the other way. He wasn't social and didn't care to expand on that set of skills, but he needed a distraction from his thoughts. He moved through the cavern threshold and padded across the stone with cat-like grace, the sunlight catching the shiny blue undertones of his fur as it intruded through the holes in the ceiling. He saw the small, sandy male sitting not far ahead and could tell even from this distance that he bore many scars. He stopped--the other wolf was surely alerted to his presence at this point, at least if he was any kind of capable. With his face wearing its usual blank mask, he waited silently for the other to address him.

His ears perk with the approach of another wolf, gaze fixing on the midnight-cloaked stranger only moments after he enters the cavern. He cuts a striking figure, from the captivating blue undertone of his fur to the languid grace of his movements. Yet something about the male chills him; perhaps the coldness he notes in the startlingly purple gaze, the emptiness in his expression. Hello, He offers, rising slowly and taking two unhurried steps forward. Some long-buried instinct still lurking within him shrieks wordlessly, urging him to turn away. There is a part of him that cannot help but recognize the danger this beast oozes; here is a creature of destruction, of shadow and terror, and he knows he should leave well enough alone. Yet there is a magnetism to this danger — an easy addiction to form, perhaps. Or maybe he's just lonely.

Their gazes met, and the beast was offered a better look at the stranger's face and the multiple scars that were there, one in particular ran across his left eye, the hazy blue of the damaged orb a clear indication that it had been rendered useless by whatever or whomever was responsible for the healed injury. Midar studied the other man with a suspicious curiosity made evident by the slight scowl that briefly formed on his face, the expression gone just as quickly as it had appeared. The stranger's greeting remained unanswered as the melonii stood there a little unsure what to do now that he was here. A fleeting thought entered his mind that he could easily kill this wolf. They were out here all alone in the mountains--no soul in sight as far as he could tell. But, that wasn't why he had sought out the other man. For now, he could see no reason to kill him; his mind wasn't that twisted yet--it was close, which was why he was here in the first place. Besides, whatever happened, at least he would get some relief from the tendrils; even temporary relief was worth it. 

He was still not sure what to say really. Most of his encounters had been strained at best, and casual conversation was not something he wished to partake in. So, what now? His ears fell a little as he grew irritated by his own discomfort. Finally, he opened his mouth, pausing a little before eventually uttering one word-- Hi. He fell silent after, waiting and watching, wondering what was next.

The stranger's studying gaze sends a chill down his spine, hackles prickling imperceptibly. Silence settles between them for several moments. It feels like an impossibly stretching length of time, confined as they are in the quiet solitude of the cavern. When the silence finally breaks, it almost startles him. His head tilts slightly at the hi, ears pulling forward expectantly — but nothing follows. Are you looking for something? It slips from him without thought, and he realizes a beat later that he's not sure why he asked; perhaps he's searching for some hint of himself in this unknown wolf. He takes a slow breath and watches the man, ignoring the tiny voice in his head that says he shouldn't ask such questions.

He wasn't sure how to answer that question. He was looking for something, but it was hard to explain, and the truth would certainly scare him away, which he found he didn't really want; he was probably close to doing that very thing with his strange ominous silence. I guess so, he answered, violet gaze softening a little. I haven't seen anyone else in a while, so... he trailed off, not wanting to come out and say the words. It wasn't that they were a lie, at least not completely. He was searching for a temporary remedy to his isolation, but there was more to it than just being lonely, and he wasn't willing to explain that part of himself to a stranger--especially not if he wanted him to stick around. 

Cautious curiosity filled his gaze. What are you doing out here all alone? he asked, continuing to study the other man as he spoke.

The answer only leaves him with more questions, but it seems the other wolf has his own question. He shrugs slightly, relaxing a little against his better judgment as the conversation continues. I felt like traveling — and this place seems... familiar, It's the best answer he can offer; the dark stranger isn't the only one unwilling to share parts of himself here. Another shiver runs through him, and he's reminded of how much he hates winter. He can't seem to get warm no matter what he does, thin as his coat is, and wandering does little to help that. He swallows and pushes the feeling away. So you're alone, then?

His eyes filled with confusion. What do you mean it seems familiar? he asked. Either it was familiar or it wasn't. Even in his confusion, deep down he knew he had felt that way more than once since waking in the woods with most of his memories gone, but that was because he actually couldn't remember half of his life. He knew when he was somewhere he had been before or hearing something he knew he had experienced; the sensory memories were still there irritatingly enough, but it was like it had happened in a dream, and the more he tried to remember it, the less he actually remembered--it was an incredibly frustrating feeling.

The other male's shiver did not go unnoticed, and Midar wondered if it was due to the cold or if he was making him feel uneasy; maybe his body recognized the monster that stood in front of him. The beast's face darkened a little with the other wolf's next question, and he took a few steps closer. I am, he answered in a low voice. Although, I guess not so much anymore. He took a few more steps, stopping when only a couple feet separated them, his purple gaze slowly moving over the male's small frame as he moved.

He can't help but shrug again in the face of the male's second question, a little caught off guard. Before he can answer, the stranger is moving closer. He tenses again instinctively, another shiver creeping down his spine; this time, it isn't the cold. Yet he's rooted to the spot, watching the man warily and struggling to find the will to speak. I... He trails off, swallowing hard. It would be easy to name this feeling purely as fear — but he can't deny the crawling heat across his skin, the icy spike of anticipation lancing through his chest. He's terrified of this man in a way that gnaws and burrows deep into his bones — and hopelessly attracted to him.

His question was answered with only a shrug; something that may have irritated him had he not been distracted by the way the other male tensed and shivered. He looked worried, an expression Midar was used to seeing on the faces of those around him--it was amusing to see other's respond in such a way usually, but it was not his intention to scare the scarred male away; he had other plans.

He watched as the other wolf tried to speak, the word cut off by a hard swallow, and Midar inhaled deeply; the smell of fear was a favorite of his, and to his delight this wolf's fear appeared to mixed with something even more appealing. A somewhat nefarious chuckle rumbled from the beast's chest. Don't worry; I am not looking for violence today. He risked another, slow step. They were close enough to touch noses if one of them were to reach out, but he did not touch yet, afraid it would startle him. It was hard to restrain himself, especially with the scent of the other's anticipation making his heartbeat quicken with his own excitement, but he refrained for now, attempting to gauge the male's receptiveness.

Oh. His breath catches, eyes widening slightly, and for a moment he's not sure he's understanding the situation correctly. The fear is suddenly overwhelmed by a rush of white-hot desire, though it lingers as a heavy undercurrent. He can only blink once in response, feeling some of the tension leave his body yet finding he still can't bring himself to move or speak. He lowers his head slightly, ears sweeping submissively against his crown. It feels so wrong to offer himself like this, to willingly be at the mercy of such a creature — but he'd been right; it is such an easy addiction to form.

He watched as the other male finally relaxed a little, but it wasn't until he saw the lowering of his head and the pressing of his ears against his skull that he took another step closer, liking the eventual submission. If allowed, he would touch his nose to the junction of his jaw and neck, further indulging in the combined scents of fear and desire emanating from the male and enjoying the warmth he could feel from their close proximity. He lingered there though, as he was not fully convinced this was what the other wolf wanted. Midar did a lot of bad things, but he had never forced himself on another. It wasn't needed; he could always find a willing participant. He wanted the other wolf of course, but he needed some kind of concrete sign that he should continue. He would oblige the other with just his company if needed.

He can hear the frantic drum of his heart, can feel it pulsing through his ears as the other male steps closer. He sucks in a sharp breath at the contact, trembling slightly but making no move to pull away. This strange, intoxicating combination of emotions is so, so familiar —
And suddenly the man is no longer midnight-cloaked but painted in rich earthen hues, and he no longer feels the gentle touch at his throat; instead he feels the harsh ache of forelegs gripping him too tightly, the breathlessness of unexpected weight atop him. Please, He murmurs, echoing the memory rushing to fill him like icy floodwater, and he doesn't truly know what he's asking for. Please touch me, he thinks; please get away from me.

The plea caused a tightening in his stomach, and the beast took it as permission to continue, too ensnared by the situation to notice if it sounded off or not. He ran his nose along the other male's jaw and down his neck to his shoulder before turning his large body so that he was standing next to him. He nipped the back of his neck and followed it with a soothing swipe of his tongue. He repeated the motions higher up on his neck and then again at the sensitive spot below his ear. He moved back down to the other male's neck, gripping the skin more firmly, testing out his company's receptiveness again before he took things further.

want to fade over this? we can conclude or continue ❤

As the man moves, he notices belatedly the purple marking dyed into his fur; somehow, this pulls him from the haze, and he is reminded all at once that this is not the past. He shivers again under the stranger's affections, a soft whine slipping from him with the first nip. His touches are so gentle — not at all what he would have expected. The last of the tension leaves him slowly with this realization. Maybe it's stupid of him — maybe he'll regret this later. Right now, he doesn't care. He surrenders himself fully to his desire, whining again breathlessly at the feeling of teeth on the back of his neck. It occurs to him that this is out of character for him; lacking most of his memories, he assumes this is the first time he's done this with a stranger, so he can't bring himself to feel ashamed. It's only one time, right?
If only he knew; old habits die hard — even the ones you can't remember.

Yes, let's. We can conclude and start something new if you'd like. I'm good with whatever. :)

At first, he wasn't sure if the soft sound he heard was meant to to stop him or urge him forward, but then he felt the other wolf's body finally relax, and he grew hopeful. He responded with a hushed whine when the beast firmly grasped the back of his neck, making it clear what he wanted. Midar needed no more clarification after that; he swiftly took his  place, connecting them without anymore hesitation, craving the relief from his dark thoughts even if just for a short time. 

Afterwards, he rested silently beside his lithe mountain companion, still feeling a little high. He realized then that he had not offered his name nor learned the name of the other wolf. He wasn't even sure they would see each other after this but what the hell. Midar he said, clearing his throat. That's my name. He didn't ask for a name in return, deciding he'd leave it up to the other male tell him or not.

alright ❤

A raw vulnerability has settled over him in the aftermath of their coupling, and he finds himself further drawn to the man. He presses closer to him hesitantly, ready to retreat at the first hint of rejection. If his touch is well-received, he quickly grows bolder in his affection, nestling against him and pushing his face into the other's chest fur; otherwise he only lingers near. Part of him is desperate for the comfort, but not desperate enough to risk whatever shaky, fleeting connection they've formed.
Unexpectedly, he's given a name. Midar. He's quiet for a few moments as the reality of the situation sinks in fully; they hadn't even exchanged names. Alarian, He offers softly, mind wandering to the spider dyed into the man's fur. He wants to ask, but he doesn't want to ruin the peace currently between them, so he goes silent instead. He's content to enjoy Midar's company as long as the male allows, though he knows eventually he'll need to head home.

Midar tensed slightly when the other wolf pressed against him, but only briefly. He relaxed into the the other's warmth, using it to anchor himself; maybe he could keep the darkness at bay for a little longer. He allowed the the other man to bury his face in his chest but didn't offer any affection in return, his acceptance hopefully proof enough that he didn't dislike the contact. He offered his name in return much to the beast's surprise. He felt a strange draw to Alarian, and it confused him a little. He wasn't sure if it was his easy submission or the fact that his mind felt oddly clear with the other man pressed to his chest, but he didn't care to look too deeply into it right now for fear he'd find an answer he wasn't prepared to deal with. Part of him wanted to get up and walk away now, but the selfish part of him, the part that dictated most of his actions, wanted to keep him for a while and explore this attraction a little more. He knew he would have to return soon as well, but for now, he stayed in the cave next to Alarian, remaining silent and occasionally drawing in the scent he knew he would crave later on his journey home.