Broken Boulder i can't tell if the want justifies the need

vagues thru the gay

He thought for a moment that he'd done it— he'd ruined it already— but then Delight spoke, and then his ears flushed hot at his tongue over the corner of his mouth. He let himself melt into the places where they touched, skin burning deliciously where each returned kiss fell. Only Delight existed right then, and that was all he needed. His breath hitched again when he heard the whine, and stopped entirely for a couple beats at the suggestion to follow.
He blinked. Wait, don't be gentle? For a few moments he didn't think he could manage that— couldn't imagine being anything but gentle with Delight. Yet, the thinly-veiled request sparked some darker desire within him; something that had already shown itself, but so infrequently he often convinced himself it didn't exist at all. Each time the feeling had reared its ugly head, it'd been easy to shove down— for lack of reciprocation or access, or simply because it had only been on a physical level.
This time was different. This time, wrapping himself wordlessly around Delight like a choking storm and exploring every inch of him he was allowed, trailing his mouth over sensitive places with sharp nips and wet kisses, acquainting himself with the most intimate details of his lover (he shivered to think of him as that now), he knew he couldn't avoid it. Whatever it really was— he'd soon find out, he thought.
Even when the storm had settled and the passion faded to contentment, he was reluctant to break their closeness. He lingered near, anxious, fussing over him with affections turned soft and tentative again as if the intensity from before had never existed at all. His teeth combed gently through his scruff, countless words bubbling up in his throat and dying before they could escape. All he could think was that he really hoped it was— good, even though they hadn't gone all the way just yet, even though he wasn't quite ready for that.