Broken Antler Fen teal

Can be a one-post if you prefer or we can have a separate thread about the aftermath; I don't have a strong preference. <3

Eljay felt relief when Teya called. He'd been worried to see her gone, worried for the length of Ibis' disappearance, too, though he hadn't shared any of these thoughts with Maia. She had enough to grieve for, and Eljay didn't want her to worry for any more of their pack. He kissed Maia see-you-later (with all that had happened lately, good-bye or even bye was never on his mind so he always stuck to see you later) and then he made his way towards the hill where Wraen was buried.

A worry stirred in the caretaker's heart for Brecheliant when Teya told that Ibis had passed away. Wraen's dream... Too many they had lost, and he feared how small they were becoming. Eljay swallowed thickly as he processed the news, silently admiring Teya's strength through all of these adversities. She did not cry now, her grief and pain seemingly turned into power. Eljay agreed easily to help bring Ibis home; she should be buried here, in her home, with her family.

Eljay expected to find a longing for Redhawk Caldera in his heart, but instead, he found that all he wanted to do was stay here and honour Wraen's wishes for this place, for Brecheliant, so that it could continue to be the place that she wished for it to be. So that it could continue to be this place for those who were left: for Teya, who reminded him of his daughter and whose strength shone like a diamond before him now, even in the dreary rain; for Bridget, who Eljay did not know very well but who had helped with the children now and again, and who had been the beacon of strength they needed when they had found Wraen's body; for Livia, who he had only just met but seemed to fit Brecheliant's mold like a glove; for Ibis' children, so they had a home to grow up in, with loving parents who would make sure the mother's love they would never again feel was doubly compensated; for Akavir, who Eljay did not know well but he had loved Ibis; for Sylvie and Hymnal, his two beautiful children, perfect in every way, who deserved not to be torn from their home; for Maia, who needed more than anyone for Brecheliant's — for Wraen's — legacy to be alive and who deserved to be happy; and... for himself, because he had left Redhawk Caldera to forge his own path, and here he was. For him, too, this place was a reminder of his long-time deceased friend. For him, this was a place where many wolves lived that he loved and that he wanted to find happiness. They might not be many now, but they were pack, and he wouldn't abandon them; found that he couldn't, even where he had expected the desire to run back to Redhawk Caldera and cry forever. He couldn't do that.

When Teya first mentioned they needed an Auspex, Eljay didn't think much of her gaze on him. He thought she was just letting it rest on him for a moment while overlooking the crowd. He nodded at first, but when she asked him — please — and then said that she would stay as a Raven but that he would be Auspex, shock fell over his rain-draped face. Me? he asked, blinking in surprise. Weren't they supposed to pick a wolf from their midst? From the Ravens? Why not Teya or Maia? He had no experience in being a leader.

Yet she asked him, and though he was clearly surprised, it meant that she must see something. He could see how Maia was too riddled by grief right now to be an Auspex for the pack. But why not Teya? He found the question on the tip of his tongue, but unable to say it. His mouth was dry despite the rain dripping down the sides of his muzzle while he tried to formulate an answer; tried to think of what he wanted to say. Yes? No? Ask questions? But no matter what Teya's reasons were for not wanting to be Auspex herself, there were reasons, so what did it matter then whether he agreed?

When Wildfire had died, he hadn't been able to take the helm to their pack and to be there for his pack mates. He hadn't been able to be there for anyone for the longest time. He wasn't sure if the grief of all the losses he had suffered before — a mate, both his parents — had hardened him now, or that perhaps it was because he had to care for Maia and be strong, or perhaps because while he'd loved Wraen as a friend, she hadn't been his sister and Ibis hadn't been his long-time pack mate with who he'd started Brecheliant. Perhaps his distance to them made it easier.

When Wildfire'd died, he hadn't been able to, but now he felt suddenly strong. Trembling, he realised, and every dent in his self-confidence shouting at him not to accept because he could never lead a pack — but strong. I'll do it, he said eventually, almost solemnly, as if he was taking a burden on himself rather than being promoted. That's how it felt, too. Not like a lofty admission of his competence, not the recognition that he had wanted from Towhee in the months before he had left Redhawk Caldera. No. It felt like a burden. But it was a burden that he was willing to carry, for these wolves.

For his family.