Redhawk Caldera Fire away, fire away.

Well, Eljay had gotten about as far as Towhee that it was a communication error and that the timing was awful. But he was trying to get to the next step, the one where he was trying not to lose Maia. He was about to speak again when finally Towhee continued talking to add more.

It made sense in a way, though there was a flaw in the logic in that it felt again as if his feelings didn't matter as much as Maia's. It had always felt as if everybody else's feelings mattered more than his, his entire life, as he had always put his own aside for everybody else. He didn't understand what had changed; why had it suddenly become so hard to be that way? Why couldn't he just go back to being selfless? Why'd he suddenly found confidence laying on the floor someplace, the confidence and audacity to speak out that he wanted others to think of his feelings, too?

Or... at least to think about that. He hadn't dared say it out loud yet.

Eljay frowned as he looked at his paws. He said, I just always pictured our children growing up at the Blackthorn den. I mean, I also considered the other thing, right? I did think about it. I did think that Fennec could... And... He sighed again as he tried to gather his thoughts and pinpoint what precisely didn't sit right with him. Well, she just said it as if she couldn't live any other way. I just hoped she'd... Eljay paused briefly. I thought she'd ask me, and we would talk about it. Like — Together. Now it just felt as if it was a choice that was fully up to him, ball in his court and all that, rather than decision that they both had a share in, a choice they would make together.