Redhawk Caldera Fire away, fire away.

Eljay nodded at Towhee's words. She was totally right. And he had thought of those things a lot. Even Weejay had mentioned them a lot. That he might have to make that choice sooner or later. It just hurt that he was making it alone, rather than with Maia. And it hurt that by Towhee's own logic to Maia, it wasn't about having a family with him. It was about having a family at the Fen. And that stung, because he had hoped that for both of them, those things were at the very least equal.

Yeah, I know. I just hoped that... He sighed as he tried to explain, then shook his head in a 'never mind' kind of gesture.

Towhee spoke again, and this time she said something that struck a whole different chord. He had been sad about what she said about Maia before, but now... Now, it was about him and his children. It had stung Eljay that Towhee hadn't even told him about her pregnancy, and it had stung him that she hadn't even stopped to consider that he might want pups with Maia.

Now though, it seemed that not only that was the case, but she also felt that at this point, they couldn't support another litter. That if he wanted it, Redhawk Caldera might not be the place for him.

That she might tell him 'no', if he asked.

Eljay swallowed thickly at that, and he tried to process everything. He tried to process the anger this made him feel. He was never angry, but now, he felt it well up in his stomach. He couldn't express it in any constructive, helpful way, but it was there, simmering, snapping about itself.

So... If I would ask you for permission to start a family here... He looked at Towhee, his expression hard to read, neutral, a little distant even; not much like his usual sensitive, soft and expressive self. I couldn't...?

Well, then. That made the choice a lot easier, he thought bitterly to himself.