Greatwater Lake Not the Man I Once Was

The way he seemed to light up when she admitted that she wanted to keep seeing him pretty much sealed the deal for her. There was no way she could wipe that look from his face now. She still had warnings screaming in the back of her mind that this was very much a bad idea, but for whatever naive reason, she cared more about making him happy. Why she cared so much about that was currently beyond her scope of understanding; she barely even understood what all she was feeling. 

It may have seemed like giving her all the control was a good thing, but it honestly made her feel more anxious about everything. Why did she have to be the only one who held the power to end what was between them? Are you saying nothing would make you want to end it? she asked. If I hold all the control, what happens when you don't want to see me anymore? Because if things went badly, maybe he would decide this was more trouble than it was worth. She knew his grim words matched with his playful nudge were meant to lighten the mood, but it didn't; it only made her brain explode with more reasons why this might not be a good idea and in return made her feel even worse about ignoring all of it to be with him anyway. Sorry, she wasn't feeling very playful right then. She offered him a roll of her eyes and a shake of her head. That's not something to joke about, she told him, raising an eyebrow. She hated to think what he might do to make her want to kill him. Just the thought made her chest tighten, and she moved closer so that she could nuzzle her face into the soft fur of his neck.