Redhawk Caldera Starship enterprise

Much had happened over the last few days; Redhawk Caldera had opened their home to the wolves of Drageda while Wildfire healed from her mysterious abuse. Elwood often made a point of stopping by the den where she was resting, and Finley had recently told him that Thuringwethil had decided to leave Wildfire here to continue to recover while the rest of her pack returned to their home. One other wolf would stay to keep an eye on Wildfire, and although the circumstances were not ideal, Elwood was still strangely happy to have his niece back in the caldera, if only for a little while.

There was another wolf that had been on his mind since Drageda's arrival, and that was Eljay. Now that things had settled into something of a routine, he first sought out @Finley and they headed together toward Drageda's campsite. He was nervous and excited to talk to his son, to find out where he had been since leaving the caldera and how he had come to join Wildfire's pack. As they drew near to Tailfeather Creek, he glanced at Finley with a small, tight smile. "Ready?" he asked.

A moment later, he tipped his head back and loosed a low call for @Eljay as they halted near the stream.

Finley was quiet as she strode along at her mate's side. She hadn't managed to get Eljay alone in the times she had visited Wildfire. There was always someone around, some distraction to be tended to. But now, with the Drageda wolves packing up to go, there were no more excuses Fin could come up with not to face him. Her own cowardice just wasn't going to cut it.

She said nothing as Elwood spoke, just gave him the look one might see upon the face of a mouse trapped in a corner by a cat. She still hadn't sorted out her feelings over Eljay's reappearance. After the initial shock and elation over the fact that it was confirmed that her eldest was alive and safe, she was left with the awful guilt that she had been such a terrible mother to him that he had left them without a word. And even worse, a part of her felt... betrayed. As though she had any right to that emotion.

Her ears pressed against her head as Elwood sent a howl through the air for their son. She leaned her shoulder into his, thankful that at least he was here to support her, and to save her ass when eventually she said or did something completely idiotic.

It was super weird being back in Redhawk Caldera now. Everything about this place called to Eljay, screamed at him to never leave again and to stay here forever. He didn't want to have to leave again, but he knew that he had to, or he would never grow out of the role of dweeb that Nightjar had justly called him — he'd never be a wolf who could contribute to a pack. Just being here made Eljay feel immobilised and weak and weird; not that he didn't feel all of those things at Drageda, but... He had to try something, and being here meant that he would fall back to old routines. He was scared of the Heda and that was probably a good thing; he hadn't wanted to come back here at all, hadn't wanted to leave Drageda territory after he had only just settled there, but because she had commanded him he had gone anyway.

He'd mostly played with the pups whenever they weren't happily prancing around their healing mother and stayed out of the way of everyone important, stuck to his own while he thought of how badly he wanted to see mommy and daddy again, but he knew that he shouldn't. They had to move on too and they had moved on, surely. Their lives were happier without him, he could only imagine. Lagan was there to help take care of the pups — not that they needed caring anymore; Towhee had grown so big! — and Eljay wasn't needed, so it was better he take himself away to enrich their lives.

While he was considering this and staring at his paws he heard the call. An ear directed towards it and he fidgetted before he got up, took a deep breath and started making his way down to the stream, where daddy was waiting. Eljay bit his lip as he approached, only to find out mommy was there too. His tail and head hung low and submissive and he licked his lips in subconscious submissive gesture as he approached, his movements awkward and like he had no idea what even to do.

He knew that Finley was leaning against him for her own comfort, but it was just as reassuring to Elwood. The silence that hung in the air was thick and almost suffocating as they waited for a response from their son. He wasn't quite sure what to expect; Eljay had seemed to be his quiet, timid self when they saw him on the day of Wildfire's collapse at the borders, but Elwood didn't know how the time away from his home and family might have changed the boy.

Eventually, Eljay approached, threading his way along the riverbank with head and tail slung low. He seemed even more nervous than usual as he licked his lips and averted his eyes from his parents, and those gestures made Elwood's heart twist painfully. It was all he could do to stop himself from begging Eljay to stay at Redhawk Caldera when Thuringwethil and her followers left.

"We've missed you," Elwood finally said after a pause that seemed miles too long. He glanced at Finley, then returned his yellow gaze to Eljay. "I'm glad you've been staying with Wifi," he added with a faint smile.

It didn't take Eljay too long to approach his parents. Finley's heart caught in her throat as she saw him. He looked just as downtrodden and nervous as ever, and she wondered for the thousandth time in her life how she had been so terrible a mother that her son walked with the constant look of being recently beaten within an inch of his life. She took in a breath to steady her emotions as Elwood spoke for them both. She gave a small nod in agreement and offered him a smile, not trusting herself to speak just yet.

Mommy and daddy didn't seem mad at all, though Eljay thought maybe it was a good thing. At least it meant maybe they thought what he had done was a good thing too, that he really needed to leave after being part of the pack for so long and still being so... well, dweeby. Daddy was the one to speak. Eljay wished that they would breach the distance and hug him but he knew he had to be strong. Knew he had to show them that he could be strong, even if he did not feel it at all right now.

Tail wagged a few hesitant and careful beats as daddy spoke. What would've become of him had he not found Wiffle? Maybe Eljay would never have found Ty either. He wondered how Ty was doing. Wished he was brave enough to make more trips outside of pack territory and visit her some time. "I'm sorry I left," he murmured and he looked away. Maybe he meant 'I'm sorry I couldn't make myself more useful at home' or 'I'm sorry I was ever born at all' or 'I'm sorry I disappointed you'. He wished he could see into their heads so that he knew if they were happier with or without him, now, so that he knew if he had made the right decision.

Finley still seemed unable to speak, and Elwood shifted ever so slightly to press his shoulder comfortingly against hers. His gaze never left Eljay's face, though, as a range of emotions shifted his expression. There was an apology, and while it was made with only four simple words, it was weighted with a thousand others that remained unspoken. Elwood shook his head gently and moved to close the gap between them.

He reached out to touch his son's shoulder with his nose, then withdrew just enough to talk with him. "It's okay. I understand. We just wish you had told us, but -- that's in the past now," he said. He certainly didn't want to make Eljay feel guilty for the decision he had made. With a small smile, he added, "Why don't you tell us about your adventures and how you ended up with Drageda?"

Eljay took a moment to respond, but when he did, all he could murmur was a quiet apology. Her mind exploded into questions and emotions, but she leaned into Elwood to steady herself, heedless of the fact that she was probably about to knock him over she was already smashing herself so hard into his side. She cast her gaze to her paws as Elwood spoke to their son of forgiveness, reminding herself that she had far more to beg forgiveness of than her son ever could. He pushed the conversation forward, asking about the time he'd been away and about Drageda. Fin's mind remained firmly planted on the why did you leave me??, but still she said nothing, keeping her eyes downcast in an actually rather Eljay-like way.

Eljay wasn't quite sure if daddy really did understand when he said that he did. He frowned thoughtfully while he was asked for his stories of Drageda. Eljay looked up at mommy, who looked emotional but the emotions were all ones he couldn't place very well. "I... I didn't know where to go so I just... walked." Truthfully, Eljay still didn't know how to get back to Drageda right now so he hoped that Wildfire'd be well enough before winter came around; he didn't think that the Heda would appreciate him being gone much longer.

"I got hungry and then I ran into Wiffle, who lives in Drageda. The Heda wasn't convinced I would be useful so she let me stay outside of the pack for ah..." He didn't remember how long, really. "... And — but then she let me in." He smiled uncomfortably, feeling like he belonged here rather than at Drageda. Everything about this place screamed for him to stay here forever. "I know I should've told you, but I — it was really hard to leave already, and I... I didn't want to be a bother another time..." Eljay looked away and licked his lips after that statement; he hadn't meant to hurt his parents or worry them, but he had drawn a line in the sand and he couldn't go back over it to bother his parents a last time, he had felt.

The boy obliged his father, talking in some detail about where he had been after leaving Redhawk Caldera. Long story short -- or short story short, since Eljay didn't really offer too much description -- he had wandered until he happened across Wildfire and was accepted into Drageda. Elwood winced inwardly when Eljay said that Thuringwethil hadn't been easily convinced to let him into their ranks. He had many skills, but his self-confidence sometimes made it difficult to see just how useful he could be.

With a glance at Finley -- who was still strangely silent, but leaning against him with her full weight -- Elwood said, "You were never a bother." He felt it was important to get that out in the open. And then, even though the past few months had been filled with worry when they didn't know where Eljay was, he added, "I'm proud of you. You made a life for yourself." It might not have been the easiest experience, but he had still done it. And Elwood suspected that what Eljay needed from his parents now was not reprimands or more coddling -- just their support.

Finley's gaze lifted to her son's face as he began to explain what had happened after he'd left. And, more importantly, why'd he'd gone in the first place. In spite of everything, she found herself feeling proud of what her son had managed to accomplish while he'd been gone. She hadn't known the commander of Drageda for very long, but felt more than certain that to earn a place in her ranks was no easy feat. While she had doubted her son's ability to survive on his own outside of a pack, she had never doubted his usefulness inside of one. His skills were of the gentler sort, but no less valuable than those of hunters and warriors - which were rather abundant, considering the natural qualities of their species. It just took someone without their head stuck up their own ass to see it.

She was liking Betty more and more every day.

Elwood spoke her sentiments before she could - that Eljay had never been a bother to them. "We're both proud of you," she said finally. She was still uncertain about how she felt towards him leaving them in the first place, but one thing was very clear: it had been for the best. For him, at least, and that was really all that mattered to Fin.

Eljay grimaced when daddy said that he had never been a bother. It made him feel a bit foolish about his decision to leave, as he had thought that his parents wanted him to — that it was time to — that he needed to make a life for himself instead of mooch off his parents. But the next thing he said was somewhat confusing, as he then said that he was proud of Eljay for making a life for himself. These two things felt very conflicting to Eljay, who didn't know whether his parents were happy he was gone or happy that he had returned. Perhaps he shouldn't solely base how he felt off what his parents would react like, but somehow it still mattered more than any of his own original thoughts what they thought on the matter.

Finally mommy spoke of pride, and Eljay smiled uncertainly. He just wanted to be with them and stay here forever, really, especially now that he was back here. He'd asked the Heda not to bring him but she had insisted, and now this was what had happened... Eljay came closer and nuzzled his nose between his parents while he admitted with a heavy sigh, "I missed you..." I want to stay here forever. But he knew he couldn't.

The two things that Elwood had been waiting for finally happened: Finley spoke to Eljay, and then the boy reached out to them physically. He glanced at Fin, feeling proud of her for feeling proud of Eljay, and in the next moment they were all embracing one another. Eljay's murmured confession was not surprising, but it was still good to hear. There had been plenty of days filled with questioning and doubt, during which they had been unsure of their eldest son's feelings toward them.

"We missed you too," Elwood said, gladly reiterating what he had already expressed. As far as he was concerned, he couldn't say it enough. They might have to accept that Eljay would eventually return to Drageda, but this time, when he left the caldera, he would know that his family loved, supported, and appreciated him.

Fin's heart caught in her throat as Eljay finally came towards them and pressed himself into their embrace. She tucked her muzzle against his back, breathing his scent in deeply. It was so familiar, yet different now in subtle ways. There was less Caldera in his fur, and more sea salt and pine. It felt all wrong, but it also didn't in a way. She almost... liked it. In a way that made her feel completely awful, of course.

"You want to come and meet your new siblings?" Fin asked, not pulling away still, "And Lagan - you're brother is dying to see you." She smiled, her tail wagging gently. How Eljay was going to get to the rendezvous site with his mommy still hugging him was anyone's guess, but she knew how much her son had loved every pup he'd ever met and she wanted him to know the four little terrors that were his newest brothers and sisters.

Finally it was like everything was coming together and falling into place. Eljay felt himself grow a little less anxious and calmer. Being in Redhawk Caldera made him feel all sorts of things and he really wished that he could return here and stay home forever, but knew that he had to move back to Drageda eventually. He'd promised his loyalty to the Heda, after all, and he couldn't just break that. He felt almost like he had left over a big misunderstanding, but perhaps they were just polite, perhaps they just didn't want to hurt him, and perhaps he was more right than he liked to think. Whatever the case, Eljay for now decided to just enjoy being with his parents and he tried to push the thought of eventually leaving this — home, still — behind to the back of his mind.

"I'd love to meet them," Eljay said with a soft smile as mommy said that he had baby siblings that he could be meeting. And Lagan... Part of why Eljay had left in the first place, thinking that he wasn't needed because they had Lagan. Maybe he should see Lagan to remind himself that he no longer had a vital part of this, that he should really head back to Drageda. He nodded, waiting for his parents to guide him towards the pups and hoping he'd have some time left before he had to leave to play with them and get to know them.

Figured this was a good place to fade, hope that's okay! :)

Elwood stepped away after a few seconds, allowing mother and son to hug for a moment longer. Finley offered to let Eljay come meet his siblings, and Elwood nodded his agreement as Eljay accepted the invitation. "This way," he said, as he turned and started to head in the direction of the rendezvous site.