Heron Lake Plateau Halp pls mom
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#1
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After the weird dual crying with Wiffle, Eljay felt super, well, weird. He had felt oddly comforted amidst all of the pain, crying and panic when Wiffle had moved against him and he didn't really know what to do with that. So instead of returning to / staying at the Copse after he'd parted ways with Wiffle, Eljay went to the only safe place he knew: moomy!

Surely, she'd know what to do. Eljay arrived at the borders around dawn and called for @Finley, sounding in a hurry. Only after he called he imagined how this must come across: what if mommy thought he'd come running back to the plateau, leaving his new pack? And also, wasn't it kind of weird to talk about this sort of stuff with your mom when you were almost four? And also, what would he even say because he didn't understand shit all about any of it himself. He just knew he wanted to feel safe again because right now his emotions were all over the place.
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Fin wasn't fully awake when Eljay's voice sounded over the Plateau. She was in that odd half-sleep stage where the scale could easily tip in either direction to put her either back to sleep or wake her up for the day. It was Eljay's call that tipped the scale and brought her up to all fours. It didn't seem like all that much time had passed since her eldest had departed for the Copse, but she knew when it came to her son, any amount of time away from her was too long for him. And she honestly kinda felt the same.

The Blackthorn grinned wide when she saw him at the borders, looking anxious and worried, just like he always did. She closed the distance between them quickly and  nuzzled his cheek affectionately. "Hey there bud!" she said, her muzzle splitting unexpectedly into a yawn. She gave her coat a good shake and fixed Eljay with a sleepy smile, dropping back onto her haunches, giving him the floor to voice whatever concerns he quite plainly had.
 
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It didn't really occur to Eljay that his mom might not be worried for his rushed call, considering he was usually anxious to some degree. He was just relieved when he saw her appear at the borders and let out a sigh. Then came the next rush of anxiety as he had no idea how to explain to his mother what was going on in his life right now. He just knew he was super confused. She greeted him like nothing new was up, even though everything was different now.

Eljay had to restrain himself not to call out 'Mommy!' in desperate happiness when he saw her come into view, and he did restrain himself, luckily. I need advice, he said, coming to the point surprisingly quick, but from then on it all stumbled backwards again. A lot of stuff happened, and just, Wiffle was sad about Bat and then I started to cry too and she sat really close to me and it felt kind of good but then I also had to cry because it's so unfair that bad things happen to someone like Wiffle and -- Eljay choked back a sob as he almost started to cry again thinking about what a big weirdo he'd been. She thanked me but she must think I'm a super big weirdo. I just -- I don't know what -- I'm so confused and how can I ever face Wiffle again? Well, surely Finley knew exactly what was going on and what had happened, now, from this super accurate clear description of the facts.
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As she watched him, it steadily occurred to Fin that this wasn't the usual level of Eljay anxieties here (Elxieties, as she called them). Something more was bothering him, and he quickly revealed just what it was. Or at least, he tried to. Finley blinked at him as he went on and on, choking on tears and fumbling over his words. Through it all, she tried to picture the scene that had transpired between him and her niece, and by the end of it... she really could not see what was so alarming about this.

"You're... embarassed that you cried in front of Wildfire..?" she asked slowly, quirking a brow. She teetered on the edge of her next words for a moment before deciding to go for it, "Buddy, you cry kind of.. regularly. She's probably seen it before, and I'm sure she would never judge you for it. I mean.. she kinda cries a lot too." She looked at the scene again - both of them sitting there crying together over Bat. Yeah, there was nothing even remotely weird about that.
 
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Mommy didn't seem alarmed at all by what he was saying, but then again, she rarely was. She was actually pretty much almost always super serene, now that he thought of it. He bobbed his head in response to her summary and hoped that mommy would come up with some good advice for him, because... Well, because he didn't know what else to do. It didn't seem very likely to him at all that Wiffle wasn't upset about this and that he had nothing to be embarrassed about.

Mommy's next words caught Eljay off guard. Didn't she understand..? He frowned and said: It was super awkward, you're not supposed to cry if -- and you shouldn't say that Wiffle cries a lot because... Yes, Eljay, why even? .. she's gonna be your leader so you should respect her. Eljay instantly felt terrible for taking to his own mother this way. What was wrong with him?! He was quick to correct himself with an under his breath stammered s-sorry, I don't know what's wrong with me! that grew from murmur to spoken out loud as the sentence grew.
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Fin had a feeling that calling him out on his love of crying might be a step too far, even though she hadn't meant it in a bad way. But when it came to it, she was surprised that she had actually offended him, but not in the way she would've thought. She continued to stare at him curiously, not at all bothered with what he'd said so much as just fascinated by the scene unfolding before her. Slowly, something began to occur to her, and she gave him a shrewd frown.

"Eljay... do you have a crush on Wildfire?" she asked thoughtfully. It was the only thing that maybe kind of made sense as to why he would be so distraught over crying in front of her (which she still swore he'd done like ninety times in his life), and also why he would've been offended by her statement because it disrespected her. Fin was tempted to smile then, but she held it back, wanting to hear her son tell her she was right before she began to celebrate.
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Eljay's fidgeting stopped quite suddenly as mommy asked him if he had a crush on Wiffle. What? No. That was a weird thought. She'd been in his life forever. He just didn't know why it was different now. What? He looked rather incredulous about the suggestion, really, because he felt that nothing he'd said really indicated that in any way.

No? I don't... think so. Though to be honest, having never experienced love in a romantic way, Eljay wasn't sure what that would feel like. But if this was it, well, count him disappointed. He'd expected it to actually feel nice all the time, not this swirl of anxiety about every single thing he did and she did.
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Eljay denied it, but Finley was not in the least bit convinced. If anything, his denial made her all the more certain of herself. She let her smile loose, but kept it small for the time being. She didn't want to upset him again, but at the same time, she was getting extremely excited about the idea of the two of them together.

"Are you sure?" she asked, "I mean, have you thought about that possibility yet? She is a girl, and you're a boy, and you've known each other for a long time, and she's very pretty..." Fin had to stop herself from continuing. She was definitely getting too excited, and she didn't want to overwhelm him with it.
 
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Asking Eljay 'are you sure' was always a bit weird because of course he wasn't sure. He'd never been sure about anything in his life. Except maybe his unconditional love for his mommy. Anyway, he looked thoroughly confused and like he had a hard time figuring it out. I dunno... he muttered and listened as mommy went on to explain all the good sides to Wiffle. Which she did have, but then again, mommy had all of those things too and he didn't have a crush on her, right?

How can you tell? he wondered out loud. If it... a crush? Or if you're just weird? Eljay was used to being weird to most others his whole life so he thought it was just him being weird, really, as he tended to.
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Eljay was uncertain, but she had gotten him thinking. He had that pained look on his face that, had it appeared on her face meant indigestion, but on her son's face meant thought. Finley tried to hold herself together as she waited for him to comment. She didn't want to push the conversation herself. She knew her son well enough to know that he would just agree with whatever she said if she said it in a way that made him feel like she really, really wanted him to. It was useful in some cases, but in this, she really wanted to know the truth.

His question made her pause to think. It was a very good question. There was a lot about love and romance that was just plain weird. I mean, Elwood loved Finley and had been a loving, devoted mate to her for four years. That was just weird, seeing as it's Finley. She didn't really know a good way to answer, based on what she knew. "Well... When you guys were together, did you feel happy?" Fin asked, then paused to clarify, "I mean, I get that you were both crying. But did being with her make you feel happy, in spite of the crying?"
 
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Mommy's next question didn't really clarify things entirely. Eljay tried to think back but it was hard to weave a way through all of the confusion and determine the actual feelings that were going on. He frowned in his thoughtful way still, then decided: I.. I don't know... He was beginning to doubt himself a little, but at least he was feeling a whole lot calmer now. Sometimes life was just confusing, and maybe this was just one of these times. Or maybe he had a crush on Wiffle, who knew. He certainly didn't.

Thanks, mommm. He stretched out the 'm' a little because he almost went to say 'mommy' but then decided he was too old for that stuff. He was almost four, after all. I.. I guess I'll just give it some more thought. He just needed to sort his thoughts, he guessed, to get to the answer. Yeah, he'd felt happy - so he didn't really answer the question correctly, but Eljay was only about 60% sure he was happy and he didn't want to rely on facts that he didn't know for sure - but he was also confused, in pain, and a little angry at the unfairness of the world to give Wiffle such pain, so it was really hard to sort his thoughts.
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Eljay didn't know the answer to her question, which Fin took as a definite 'yes'. She resisted the urge to display her reaction, which inwardly was a mix of all out celebration and melting over how adorable it was that her grown up baby boy had his first crush. She wondered how Wildfire would feel about all of this. She knew her goddaughter was hurting, and women who hurt often turned to whatever shoulder they could find to cry on. Maybe romance would blossom between them from there, though Fin couldn't be too sure. Eljay was as far opposite from Betty as an individual could be. That seemed to suggest her son might not be Wiffle's type... in more ways than one... But, she had run away from Betty. Maybe the opposite of Drageda's commander was just what she needed right now.

Finley was sure to spend ample hours considering this situation in the future. For now, Eljay took her attention back with an interesting version of mommy. She quirked a brow at him, but remained silent as he continued. "Well, there's no need to stress yourself over it," Fin replied when he was done, "You can't force your feelings. All you can do is just keep being there for Wiffle and see where it goes. And I really don't think you need to worry about her judging you or anything like that. She's known you her whole life. I'm sure you have nothing to feel embarassed about."
 
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Eljay was glad that mommy didn't press the issue further. He'd rather just forget about the possibility because it only confused everything even more. He listened to mommy's advice and bobbed his head. Okay. I -- I guess I can do that. He nodded again and said: Thanks, mommy. Eljay wasn't sure what he'd ever do without his dear mommy (luckily the thought of outliving her hadn't really crossed his mind yet).

That sort of naturally concluded their conversation but Eljay being Eljay he kept sort of hovering around waiting for mommy to finish the conversation officially instead of just saying bye and leaving.
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Eljay tentatively accepted her proposition. She could tell he wasn't too certain of anything at all yet, but she was confident he'd get there. While he fell quiet, she began to imagine the two of them together. It wasn't a new thought; she'd considered it before when she and Elwood had pondered arranging a marriage for their eldest. That was back when Wildfire was with those dragon wolves - a place that Fin had never really thought fit her very well. This picture fit much better. She needed to make sure this happened.

"Wanna grab something to eat before you head back?" Finley offered. Eljay didn't seem to inclined to run off immediately, and while he hadn't been gone all that long, she'd still missed him and wasn't inclined to hurry him off immediately either.

wanna fade? <3
 
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yes, i'll archive! <3

Mommy offered something to eat, and Eljay accepted this with a wave of his tail. I'd love that, he agreed softly and Eljay followed mommy so they could eat something. He let his thoughts simmer for a bit as he ate, while mommy's mouth was full and she couldn't bombard him with more thoughts and questions. Then he went back to the Copse, still feeling confused and not prepared for what he'd find back there.