Broken Boulder so deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me

Continue without Xahi for now?

Maybe this is unhealthy. Alarian fought the urge to flinch away from the cold, distant voice in his mind. It was a thread of logic among the hurt— maybe this is dramatic. But hadn't he lost so much already? Hadn't he hurt enough by now? Something in him held briefly to the knowledge that this was naive, that he had no reason to believe it would ever be enough.
When his friends arrived, the boy straightened slowly, ashamed that they had seen it. He had needed just a moment— just one second to wallow in the misery of it all. That was too much to ask, and suddenly Ali felt foolish for having wanted it. There was never a time to break anymore, not since he had joined this group. If he only knew how to stop, he thought, perhaps running away would not be so tempting.
Lennon is gone. The new Governor said stiffly, not daring to look directly at Korei or Xahi. I've searched. The scent's stale.