Ocean's Breath Plateau walrus fat

oh my lord I apologize for this wall of text please just skim

The panther drew in another sharp, unsteady breath at the promise in his seal hunter's voice. Oh, how he knew it! Their bond ran to a depth Dutch hadn't known he possessed. Not for the first time, he felt — called to action, But he was uncertain as to what action he was meant to take. So he only held Chakliux a little tighter before, reluctantly, pulling away.

The look on the seal hunter's face made him wonder, briefly, if he too felt that an embrace could not convey the strength of feeling behind it. He divined, however, that he must instead be wondering where Dutch had been all this time.

"We were following a ravine," Dutch murmured, his voice still low as he drew his seal hunter further away from the sleeping pile. They were still in his line of sight when he sat with his shoulder braced against a coastal cypress, but they would not disturb their slumber. "Looking for Nutuyikruk," he went on, explaining. "Months ago, now. We were travelling along a ravine when the weather took a strange turn. The rain was so thick we could not see through it, and then the earth rumbled beneath us and the ground began to fall away. I made it to safety, and Valiant did not."

This was the first of his many failings on the journey, and Dutch looked away from Chakliux, out toward the ocean, so that he would not have to see the judgement or absolution in his eyes.

"He was buried. I could not see him, at first, but I stood at the edge calling his name for — for a long time," Dutch said quietly, his voice reedy once more. "Eventually, he pulled himself from the mud. He answered me, and then he did not. I looked for a way down, but — it was dark. The way was very far. I'd found no path before the earth rumbled again. This time it was the floods coming down the ravine. The water — "

Here, he had to stop and swallow down the lump in his throat. Even knowing the outcome, the memory still filled him with grief and dread.

"I was so afraid," he admitted, though under forgiving starlight, he knew this was only natural. Of course he had been afraid. "The water washed away the mud, and I could see him once more. Sometimes he swam, but other times he only... floated. And I followed his body down the river, further and further from home. An impossible distance! It was daylight again before I lost sight of him. I followed the ravine anyway, and I found him again the next day. Alive! But still so far down. He was hurt. He couldn't stand. He just lay there on a muddy embankment, and we could only pray that the water would keep going down, that I could find a way to reach him..."

The threat of losing himself in these memories forced him to distance himself from the narrative. He cast his gaze downward for a moment before looking up at Chakliux once more.

"I did. Eventually," he said, steadier now. "And brought him to a safer place. But he could not make the climb to higher ground. We made camp there, but most days, I only dropped food over the edge. The way was not easy." His eyes fluttered shut. He was tired. "I caught Katmai's scent on a hunt, and I followed it. For weeks. And when I found him, he was with other wolves who meant to keep him. I killed two, but a third ran instead of fighting. We returned to Valiant. I thought I would find his body, but somehow, he was still alive. Just... so weak."

There was a part of Dutch, even now, that wished he would've found him dead. The guilt might have been greater, but meeting his brother's eyes after abandoning him had been one of the hardest things he'd ever had to do.

"So we fed him," said Dutch. "But many weeks passed before we were able to pull him from the ravine. I pushed and Katmai pulled. And we have been traveling since then. Through a mountain pass instead of alongside the ravine. The way was... difficult. And the wolf that got away came back in the night. We were all weak, by then."

But Dutch had killed him, too. An ear and another life was not too great a price to pay for his son. But all this time away... it was difficult for the panther to decide what the right choice should have been. If he should have abandoned Valiant long ago. If he should have written Nutuyikruk off before they'd even come to the ravine.