Arrow Lake clanging shields, companions tramping, bronze prows, men in bronze,
wearing my dream like a diadem in some better land.
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#6
A smile came to her lips at Reina’s acquiescence, and the slumbering, studious mind of hers roused in preparation for whatever sorts of words were to arrive next. Instead, once Blodreina finished, the gleam pressed thin and fainted into a paltry echo of itself. A ghost curled up in the corners of her lips. It was a highborn’s smile; the reluctant sort which only remained out of courtesy. ”We... there is...” Argent eyes eluded the words when the rest of Aurëwen could not, a readying intake of breath following. In this moment, she envied gazes, and the blameless emotions they could hold.

The green-seer shivered, and knew it wasn’t only from the rain. She didn’t want to know what belied in her own gaze, but rather than prolong this dance around reasons, she lented, ”We have had a quarrel, again. A fortnight ago, I went to ze Lair with ze purpose of foraging, and ended up fighting to get them, instead.” And even if spring had made her fevered and foolish and rather off-kilter, the fault was still with her. The muscles in her back rippled, tensed, for whatever onslaught Reina might dole out. ”I thought of why I’d set out that day, but... I didn’t think of ze children, of Verx, if I’d gotten my neck snapped. I didn’t, and now...”

The meager smile faltered entirely, then, and it took everything within her to keep step with Blodreina — to not take flight, to not be so damn flimsy. Salty-stupid tears that she hadn’t shown to anyone in weeks  ( aside from her little sun-and-stars )  crested in the cradle of dark lashes, and Aure made do with a sniffle and a diligent swab at her muzzle, her eyes. ”And we haven’t spoken since.” And there was nothing more she despised, these rifts that only made it all more entangled between them.

It seemed that Mahler hadn’t been the only one to mistake why Verx lingered at her side — only to help raise the children, just as he’d said — and she couldn’t meet Blodreina’s gaze. She knew even less of loving than of how to properly mother; knew even less of how to properly reign; and all of which she felt utterly inept in. She understood that love wasn’t simply giving your heart and vowing it to another; it was an action, not only in sweet nothings. Love was a promise of responsibility and endless understanding, too.

And hadn’t she been industrious in the tending and adoring of her children? At the very least, tried to be? ”Now, I look ahead. I try to. I... I would ask Verx to teach me, this Trig, but...” Aure was exhausted to her marrow, but her toiling for Dragomir and Isilmë was meant achingly from her heart and soul. She loved them as much as she loved herself — follies and faults be damned. She loved Vercingetorix with every breath she took; missed him, and sorely missed whatever intimacy they might’ve just found. But... ”Perhaps you can tell me how to make amends to him in his tongue,” the silver scoffed, a flicker of an inscrutable smile as she finally looked back to Blodreina.