Totoka River Old faces

@Valette

Steady had left the packlands early that morning, once again, to try and find food for the pack. The adults all seemed to be contributing to feeding the pups at the expense of themselves, and it was beginning to show. Steady's own body was leaner than usual, his belly sunken in as a telltale sign that he was underfed. But, though they were sometimes hungry, the pups didn't have to beg for long before they got meals, and that's what matter the most right now. Surely, the greens of the land would return in full, and with it, their prey. They just had to stick it out a while longer.

He had followed the river starting at Gyrfalcon's Peak, through Ravensblood Forest, and onto the beach, where it emptied out into the ocean. He had hoped what little prey was left would need the water, and therefore he might find something. But not one hint of food had passed his nose or his eyes. He sighed, sitting back on his haunches as the ocean breeze filtered through his coat.

Not sure if she is still with McTavish so I will be vague about that.

Valette had learned a vital skill from the huge loner she met up with. The skill of fishing was really valuable for the young girl, and it had determined her survival as a lone wolf with the lack of prey. As a loner she would not be able to hunt big prey, yet seeing that those were gone all the wolves were out for the smaller kinds that she ate. Fishing was new to her, and annoyingly, it did remind her of her father, yet it also fed her now in these hard times.

Valette was out on the beach, sometimes there where some weird creatures around here that could live in the sea and on land. She did not know what they were, but they were interesting her. The girl often tried to chase them or even bite them. She was still a youngster after all. Now her lithe frame was trotting over the beach, to think that she had been plump once, was gone now. The girl was still a bit mournful about losing her family, her PHX family. How bad of her. She felt horrible. Her eyes then settled on a familiar figure... Steady! But... no. He was in Mason's pack and she was not sure if she wanted to see him. But, now he had probably seen her, so she could really run off, though she was tempted to. She kept her distance and eyed at him. Maybe he was hunger driven crazy too.

Steady had closed his eyes momentarily as the wind rushed over him. Any other time, he might have thought it soothing, as if it could heal the wounds of his broken soul. But, no. Nothing could heal him. The rain could wash his pain away, the wind could not carry it away, the once-rich valleys could not absorb it into their soils. But, maybe... Maybe time could mend it to something he once was. Maybe time could give him back the purpose he once had. 

He opened his eyes, and caught a glimpse of moments, his head jerking in the direction of the wolf. It was not someone he had really ever expected to see before. His head tilted, his ears perked, wondering silently why she didn't come closer. His actions before her the last time they had met was less than what Steady had wanted to show, but he hoped that hadn't put her off. 

His lack of confidence that she wanted to see him didn't stop him from standing and walking towards her, a slow, lumbering pace that gave her plenty of time to leave if she wished. He stopped several yards from her, a soft smile pulling at his lips. Hello, Desna, he greeted, ignorant of her name change. He remembered she had been strong in the face of her mother's death, had dealt with it much better than he had. She understood better than he that Scarlett had needed death to release her from her pain.

Valette stood frozen when Steady saw her. She sat down with her ears back a bit. Being along made her less confident that she was last time she saw Steady. He was also a very big wolf, which she had not really realized before. The girl glanced at the other and gave him a quick smile in greeting. She was not sure what she was going to do. If she would go to Silvertip then she could never leave that place again. Valette realized in her time alone that she was now completely free, no ties to anyone. She could go wherever she liked.

The girl dipped her head, not sure if she should tell him about her new name change. The girl looked still a bit ruffled. "Hey Steady," she spoke and ducked her head a bit. When she had been going to Mason that was when she ran into all those bugs and gotten lost. It was clear in her fur that she was a loner now, and maybe Steady could connect the dots too that she was a loner, and had not yet knocked on their door. Her hazel eyes fell into his. "I.. um.. yeah," she mumbled, somehow feeling guilty and she was not entirely sure why.

She had changed. The confident wolf that had met he and Mason at the borders of her pack did not now sit before him. Her body had changed, her fur ruffled, not smooth, and she as a bit thinner. Well, most of them were, what with prey being gone and all. None of that really surprised him. It was her expression, her demeanor, that struck him confused. They were not friends, but they were not strangers, either, so he supposed he expected a more familiar greeting. She was nice enough, but... Something just wasn't there.

She mumbled a few words, obviously lost on what to say. He regarded her quietly for a few moments, thinking on what he should say. What was there to say? It was obvious she was not with a pack, as she no longer smelled of one, and he considered inviting her back to Silvertip Mountain with him, unaware she had been socializing with Mason. Times have been hard on us all, he commented finally before shifting his gaze away momentarily. The wolves of Silvertip had dwindled, and he knew the chances of them disbanding grew stronger every time one more wolf left. They didn't have enough wolves to do patrols, to find food, to recruit new members... Each wolf in the pack needed to do it all, and finding prey took up the most time. They needed more help. You're welcome to come to Silvertip Mountain, if you like, he said softly, leaving the invitation open so she didn't have to make a decision now if she didn't want to.

Valette looked at Steady, knowing the invitation was coming. The girl was not sure what to do. Everything was so complicated. Her hazel eyes looked at the darker male and slowly nodded because times had been hard. She had lost everyone. The girl looked at her paws for a moment, before looking up. There it was. The girl slowly nodded. "I am not sure. I lost everyone. My father and brother, then my mother, my sisters followed. I went to see my bother and father but it turns out I truly lost them, then I came back to my pack to see my step father being evicted, the couple that inspired me broken up. Then once we traveled away from the Phoenix lands I lost my pack. I am truly alone now. No real ties to anyone," she spoke, slowly and quite steady too.

The girl looked at him more determinedly as if she had found power in her own words. "I am not sure if I would want to bond myself to anyone again. I only lose my loved ones or the ones I am close with. I am doing pretty okay on my own, maybe it is just better that way. I know Mason might not like it. But, if I join your pack I think he will ask more from me that I currently want," she spoke, thinking about the possibilities and how she did not want to break Mason's heart. If she would 'disappear', correction, if Desna would disappear then Mason's might forget about her.

He listened, a frown forming on his maw as she told her story. It seemed she had been dealt a rough hand since he had last seen her. She had lost many of her loved ones, and her entire pack. And then she convided that she wasn't sure she wanted to form any more bonds, afraid she would only lose them, as well. It seemed she had spoken to Mason about this already, and was worried about his nephew wanting more than she could give. 

He sighed before speaking, his voice soft. Desna, the only ones we lose are loved ones. Because they matter to us, it hurts every time it happens. We don't hurt over the loss of a stranger, but they die everyday, don't they? We just don't know about it. I know it hurts to lose someone, I do. I've just lost my brother, he confided in her. It was possible Mason had already told her of Fitz' passing. It's your choice whether you want to make new friends, or join a pack. But, I hope you see how much more enriched your life would be with someone who is there for you. He paused, unsure whether he should touch on the topic of Mason or not. In the end, he chose to comment. My nephew is a good wolf. I don't believe he would try to push you into anything you didn't want. He truly did believe that. You only need to tell him upfront. 

He knew Desna had a lot on her plate, and he didn't want to push her himself. I'll leave the invitation open. I know you're overwhelmed with all the decisions you feel you have to make. So, if ever you decide to come, you'll be welcome, even if it's just to say hello. He hoped life would be kinder to her. She was a genuine wolf, and she derserved some stability, be it on her own, or with a pack.

Steady made excellent points she had not realized herself yet. But in her eyes all her loved ones were gone and dead. Mason and Steady were just friend in her eyes, not loved ones. She would still be sad if something would happen. The young girl listened though, and she took his words to heart. So at least that was saying something.

Though telling Mason to his face sounded really scary. The young female nodded. "Thank you. I will think of your pack, most definitely, now I just really needed to figure out me," she admitted. The girl did step closer and gave him a nudge. "For me it has just been too intense, I need some time alone, even though my instinct says to join. I want to grow from this, not turn into something bad," she spoke.

He sensed her rejected coming, and was ready for it. He understood the reasoning she gave, and that she needed time to find herself again. He could not fault that in the least. His tail wagged as she nudged him, and he returned the gesture, wishing he could lend her some of his strength. Will you come see me, regardless of your decision? I'd like to know you're doing okay, he asked softly. He would support her, no matter where she went.

He figured she would probably wander for a while, find new friends hopefully, and maybe one day join a pack. He hoped they would keep connected through it all.

Valette looked at Steady and watched him regardfully when he asked her some commitment. She stayed quiet for a moment and then shook her head. "No. Because I will not know for sure if I can keep that promise," she spoke to him, which was actually really honest. Yet, she also didn't want any commitment to anyone, and not someone to report to what she was doing, probably also the reason why she was not tempted to go to Reek's pack.

The female looked at Steady with hazel eyes. "But if I wander past, or if I feel like seeing you then I will come visit," she spoke, it was not a promise that she would come by for sure but it was at least something Steady might be able to work with.

He sighed, glancing down before returning his attention to her. He gave her a small grin. I admire your honesty, he said genuinely. She could have lied, said she would come by, gave him false hope. But, she was realistic and he appreciated that. 

He went to her with the intent to give her neck a friendly nudge. I do hope you'll feel like coming by sometime, he said honestly. It wasn't to push her, but he did want to state that to let her know she was wanted, and would always have a friend. 

With that, Steady turned and started in the direction of home.

Valette nodded in return. There was not much for her to say other than goodbye wishes as the other left. She herself made her way more to the coast, she had never seen this type of land and was very curious about it. It meant that she could explore as long as she wanted, discovering herself and seeing what the world had in store for her.

-end-