Stone Circle And I end the story that we didn’t even get to start

Laurel was glad that he didn't press it. Instead more apologies flowed from his mouth and while Laurel was grateful that he didn't press the subject further it was also a lot to take in. She frowned as he said that he wanted to be there for her now and that he wanted to be relied on. The words sounded foreign when mentioning Xan -- he had been many things in her life, but never reliable -- and though Laurel was afraid she also felt a spark of.. something.. somewhere deep down, something of a desire.

A desire to have someone like that in her life, someone she could rely on and someone who would love her. Indra had been that for most of her life but now she was gone and Laurel knew that it would never be the same. She wasn't sure she could go on, but she had to, each and every day, not because she chose to but because that was what life was about and what it had always been about. And being your own anchor wasn't as easy as being someone else's, having no one was hard and she wasn't sure how much longer she could do it before she made a stupid mistake that would cost her her life. The worst part was that Laurel was not so sure she even cared about that last thing anymore. What if...

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

She looked at the ground, away from him. I'm scared, she admitted. Not just of him -- because he was a man and all they had ever done was hurt her over and over again with pretty lies and harsh actions and thoughtlessness and violence -- but of putting even a small crumble of her heart in his paws, of giving him a small part of herself. And at the same it was so tempting, it was the only thing she could do, the only choice she could make because what else did she have? What, if not for Xan, did she have left to live for?